BULMA’S PREGNANT

PART ONE : It's Blue

"Please, please, please don't turn blue. Just don't turn blue!!" Bulma begged. The small strip blithely ignored her and started to turn a pale blue "Come on, I swear I'll be good from now on. I'll be strong the next time. I won't give in, even if he begs." The home pregnancy test wasn't impressed by her promises and serenely continued from light sky to an intense, almost royal blue. "Oh no, NO. I can't be pregnant. Damn pills, what good are they? What on earth is Vegeta going to say?" She was afraid to even contemplate it. "Ok, calm down Bulma. The box say's 99.7% effective, right? It could be wrong." She crossed to the phone to make an appointment with her gynecologist first thing in the morning. "No need to tell Vegeta until I'm sure..."

Vegeta came in from a long day of training. It had been about a year since he first started staying at Capsule Corp, and he was stronger than ever. *I'm close, I can sense it.* he thought to himself. *I will be a Super Saiyan. I have to get stronger. Then I'll crush those androids and prove to everyone that I am the superior warrior, not Kakkarot* He headed for the kitchen in search of food. Bulma was sitting at the table with several empty bowls and a far off look in her eyes. *She must have been really hungry, she never eats that much.* He walked up behind her and touched the back of her neck. "So serious Bulma-chan, did you screw up on a invention or something?" She glanced at him, but she didn't respond. *Hmm, that's not like her. She's always got something to say. I wonder what's wrong?* He didn't ask though, feeling concern for another still felt odd to him. Instead he got his food and sat down beside her in silence.

**Oh Vegeta, still too afraid to show you care. I know you do though. I can tell because you're still here. Will you ever tell me?** Bulma stood up, and began hesitantly "Vegeta??" He set aside his 6th helping and glanced up at her. "Um, **I think I'm pregnant**. Well , you see... **We're probably going to have a baby**. That is ...**I want to have your baby**." then more forcefully, " I'm going to be going somewhere in the morning, so you'll have to fend for yourself. Try not to blow up the building while I'm gone! **Coward**" He narrowed his eyes. *Why is she always ordering me around?!* "I'm perfectly capable of 'fending for myself' and I will do exactly as I please." "Fine!!" she screeched as she leapt to her feet. "Go on blow yourself up. I won't be here to patch you up!" With that she stormed off.. *Hmph, must be PMS. It has been a while since her last cycle. Uh, uh-oh....*

Bulma sat by the phone a week later in a slight state of shock, the test was positive. **I'm going to be a mother. Damn, I wasn't expecting this. Where the hell is that baka when I need him?** Vegeta had been conspicuously silent since she'd blown up at him at the dinner table and he'd taken off somewhere that morning and hadn't returned. She wasn't surprised at his absence, he often took off to train outside the gravity room. But he was usually pretty conspicuous about it , zooming past her window rattling the glass so she knew he was leaving. Suddenly a wave of nausea hit her sending her flying to the bathroom. After giving her offering to the porcelain god she leaned miserably against the shower door. "Shimatta, how long is this going to last?" she pulled down a washcloth and wiped her mouth, "Damn you Vegeta! Where the hell are you?"

Meanwhile, at the local library the mighty Prince of Saiyans was elbow deep in maternity books completely oblivious to the library staff's fearful glances. "Let's see, the lack of a menstrual cycle in addition to increased appetite and morning sickness are the usual indications that you may be pregnant. Yeah, all that applies. Hmm, average gestation is nine months. Changes in stamina such as lethargy or even increased energy are not uncommon. Many women begin to report the infamous cravings...Okay, labor..... Iya, that's disgusting!!!"

PART TWO: Late Night Munchies

Six months later Bulma was digging through the pantry at 2 a.m. "No, no, nothing looks good... Hey Vegeta!!" He stumbled into the kitchen. "What is it woman? Can't you tell I'm trying to sleep?!" She ignored his surly attitude. "Vegeta, could you go to the store and get me some apricot tofu and pickled anchovies?" He gave the appropriate look of disgust and crossed his arms in his usual arrogant pose. "What do I look like a servant?" She didn't even acknowledge him and continued her list "Oh and some lemon ice cream and that soy sauce with the crystallized ginger in it too." A small tick started in his eye, "Bulma, it's 2 a.m. can't this wait?"

She turned to him and a familiar glistening started in her eyes. *Kuso, she's going to start crying. I hate it when she...* "How can you be so callous?", she bawled " I just want a little food. I need to keep up my strength if our son's going to be healthy." He dropped his arms "Bulma you ate more than me a dinner, and...." The tears began to flow a little faster. "Kuso!! I'll go" She brightened up instantly, "Great, here's some money. Make sure to get a lot and don't take too long or the ice cream will melt." Vegeta grumbled as he pulled on a shirt and shoes on his way out the door. He powered up and flew off toward the all night grocery.

He landed in front of the door startling the elderly man who was gathering errant carts. "Do you need a cart sir?" he asked pushing one towards the rather imposing figure of the mighty prince. Vegeta gave a hmph grabbed the cart and went into the store. "Let's see apricot tofu, pickled anchovies, lemon ice cream, and soy sauce. Iya, how can she eat that stuff?" He went down the aisles grabbing huge armloads of tofu, anchovies, and ice cream. Then he got to the soy sauce aisle, only there was no sign of the requested brand. He'd made the mistake of bringing home the wrong brand before and it wasn't a error he cared to repeat.

He shouted at the stock boy "You, where is the soy sauce with the crystallized ginger in it?" The teen looked up "I'm sorry 'sir we no longer stock that brand." The tick above his eye returned. Vegeta grabbed the guy and shouted "What do you mean you no longer stock it!?! We're in the heart of Japan and I can't even get a bottle of soy sauce!?!" The young man stammered "It, it was an imported brand. It's still available in specialty stores." Vegeta began to growl and sent the hapless youth flying down the aisle. Luckily he landed in a toilet paper display. Vegeta grabbed the food he had so far and went through the automated checkout.

He went to the phone booth and looked up specialty stores. He found one listing for a specialty store that was still open. He couldn't fly since the heat of his ki shield would melt the ice cream so he tied the bags securely then set off on foot. He made it there in record time. *Hmph, too easy.* He went to open the door but it wouldn't budge. Then he noticed the sign. Out to Lunch, back in fifteen minutes. *Lunch at 3 in the morning?* He looked through the glass and saw a young woman slurping up noodles behind the counter. He pounded on the glass.

The girl looked up and shouted "I'm sorry sir you'll have to wait a while." That tick was back again. "I just need one item, let me in this instant you baka human!!" The girl frowned "I'm sorry sir I can't do that." Vegeta clenched his fist and managed to count to one before he ripped the door off it's hinges and stormed into the store. The girl cowered in the corner vehemently wishing this store had an alarm system. The saiyan prince marched up to the counter "Where is the soy sauce with the crystallized ginger?" he bit out. The terrified clerk pointed down the proper aisle. Vegeta grabbed the industrial sized can tossed enough bills to pay for his purchase, and hopefully the damages, then strode out the door.

Then he noticed the ice cream had melted. He began to shake with fury "Kuso, could it get any worse?" He knew he'd get an earful if he returned with melted goods so he powered up and flew top speed to the mountains. Once there he buried the half dozen cartons in the ice, arranged the remaining goods within his ki shield so they wouldn't freeze, and sat down to wait for it to re-freeze. A few moments later he felt a familiar ki approaching. *Urgh, of all the mountains in Japan he has to pick mine.*

Piccolo stopped mid-flight and dropped down to ground. "Vegeta, what are you doing here? I thought you were training at Capsule Corp." Vegeta gritted his teeth. "I was." Piccolo crossed his arms, "So what are you doing here?" The tick returned in full force. He sprang to his feet and shouted "I go where I please namek!!" The two warriors began to stare each other down. Then an ominous howling broke the air they both stared into the gloom. Suddenly a huge pack of saber-toothed wolves descended on the pair.

The Z warriors began to toss the unsuspecting wolves aside like so many stuffed dolls when a new sound suddenly broke through the fray. "Avalanche!!" cried Piccolo. That did it!! Vegeta fired up his ki and sent an immense blast at the oncoming snow. It split around him, effectively burying Piccolo and the wolves. The mighty Saiyan stood there heaving for a moment before glancing over at a huge pile of snow, the sight of the half buried namek did wonders for his mood. He smirked, grabbed the amazingly intact groceries, making certain to leave some ice around the ice cream and set off for home. Still buried in the snow and surrounded by a rather shocked pack of wolves Piccolo sighed "That guy can be so annoying."

A tired, ragged, and worn Vegeta landed in front of Capsule Corp. a little after dawn and took his packages inside. He heard some voices coming from the kitchen as he walked down the hall. He recognized that voice, *It's that baka Yamacha. What's he doing here?* He strode into the kitchen where Bulma was eating a large dish of lemon ice cream covered in soy sauce, and sprinkled with anchovies and chunks of tofu as Yamacha noshed on some tea and pastries. "Hey, Vegeta" she grinned pointing to a rather large pile of packages. "Look what Yamacha brought! All my favorites!! Wasn't that sweet of him?"

PART THREE: The Labor

It was raining buckets when Bulma Breifs went into labor. Vegeta was out in the tempest dodging lightning bolts and her parents were enjoying a rare moment of affection in front of the fireplace. She hated to interrupt them but she couldn't very well fly into the clouds after her mate. "Um, Mom, Dad, I think it's time." "Time for what dear?" her mother asked as she rearranged her mussed hair. "I imagine she means it's time for the baby dear" said Dr. Briefs. "Oh, OH MY, hold on dear I'll go get your bags. Honey you go get the car." Mrs. Briefs ran to the closet and pulled out a suitcase and a package of Dinocaps, as Dr. Briefs braved the storm to pull around the car.

High above in the clouds, Vegeta felt the sudden ripple of excitement move through what he was begining to think of as his family. He saw Mrs. Breifs chattering a mile a minute as she ushered Bulma into the back of the van. *It must be time for the baby* he thought. Bulma looked up into the sky, the lightning was blinding, but somehow she could sense him up there. **I'll be waiting for you Vegeta-sama.** Dr. Briefs got them to the hospital without incident and the staff immediately whisked her off. "Where is the father?" asked a nurse just as a rain-soaked figure strode through the doors of the maternity ward. "That's him now" said Bulma.

The nurse took a rather critical look at the mighty prince and clucked her tongue. "We can't let you into the birthing center like that." Vegeta gave her a look that had leveled many a warrior, and got not so much as a twitch in response. She sent the orderlies and Bulma along to her room and continued to stare unblinkingly at the saiyan prince. "Come on then, let's get you cleaned up." Vegeta's jaw dropped, she was just like Bulma, were all women like this?

Twenty-hours later he was wishing he'd run when he had a chance. "AAAAAGGHHHH!!!! IYAAAA!!! I HATE YOU VEGETA!!! " Bulma's screams rang through the room as the exhausted doctor and her staff kept vigil. "IF I GET OUTTA THIS I SWEAR I'LL BEAT YOU TO A BLOODY PULP!!" Bulma grabbed her mate by the hair and slammed his head into the bed rails in time with that statement. *By Kami*, thought Vegeta as stars began to spin in front of his eyes *how the hell do humans survive this?*

"Hey I didn't do it by m..." he never got to finish that ill-conceived statement. Bulma managed to pick him up and send him flying across the room. *Kire!! How did she manage that?* Just then a loud wail pierced the air. Vegeta got back to his feet and got his first look at his new son. "Would you like to cut the cord?" asked the doctor. Vegeta nodded but ignored the scissors sending out a minute ki blast to sever the cord. "There, at least we can do that like a true saiyan." The doctor balked at the unorthodox method, but said nothing. The entire labor had been unusual. "What about the tail?" she asked. "Do you want us to remove it?" "Hai." said Bulma at same time Vegeta said "No." Bulma glared at him and said "We'll decide later."

END