Before Fast
Thursday, September 11, 2008
My plan is to fast four days, from Friday September 12 2008, trough Monday. This will be hard for me since I have never spent a day without eating.
I have decided to do this because I am suffering from anxiety. My work is abysmal. I am wasting my days unable to concentrate. Instead I of working I end up surfing the web; imagining weird situations, or getting excited about weird projects that I should not be starting. This is one of such projects.
To be honest, I was interested in fasting for 16 years. I was in a small town in a Croatia when I read the book from by a natural healer. Being an impressionable young person (I was maybe 14 then), I was immediately fascinated by meditation, yoga, and fasting among other things. I decided to fast right then and there. Therefore I did what book advised me to do, and I visited a village hospital to see a doctor. I waited for maybe an hour in the waiting room with lot of sick old people. Once my turn came I anxiously told the doctor of wanting to fast for 10 days. Her eyes got all large and she said angrily "who told you that was a good idea?". I do not know what I replied but that was the first and last time that I attempted to fast.
Like I said earlier I am confused and anxious at work. I am also suffering from daily headaches for many years now. I am overweight, and I frequently have a heartburn. Frankly I feel out of control. I need to do something drastic or I feel like I will loose my job. I hope that this fast gives me a jolt that I need.
At work I have something that I need to finish by September 19th which is in 8 days. I will probably need to go to the office over the weekend which will be during the fast and which will not be easy. Right now I cannot focus at work. Fasting may make this much worse.
From what I have heard, first three days are the hardest. I can expect headaches, vomiting, pain, etc. It is almost time to sleep. Tomorrow I start fasting. Right now I will have some fruit and go to bed. I am very anxious.