CAPRICORN December 22 - January 19
You are an upholder of tradition and authority. This is because you lack
imagination and creativity. You cannot take honest criticism. Not even
from your mother. Most prison guards are Capricorns.
AQUARIUS January 20 - February 18
You are an amiable person who likes to be popular. You need to be around
others because you cannot stand yourself. When alone, you do weird things
to your body. Sex change operations are common among Aquarians.
PISCES February 19 - March 20
You are a kind and gentle person. Your sensitive nature has given you the
reputation of being a patsy and a lughead. Your lack of ambition is
directly related to your lack of talent. Pisces make good ushers.
ARIES March 21 - April 19
You have great energy and are always enthusiastic. Your vivaciousness is
nauseating to others. You concentrate on future success to avoid
confronting your past and present failures. You have strange relationships
with people much younger than yourself.
TAURUS (Bull, color blue & pink) April 20 - May 20
You are steadfast, even stubborn, in your ways. People who know you well
describe you as a pighead. You enjoy music but the only thing you can play
is a radio. You are a communist.
GEMINI May 21 - June 20
You are very exuberant and enjoy expressing yourself. Your friends think
of you as a busy-body and a bore. You brag about your versatility but deep
down you know you can do nothing well. Most welfare recipients are Geminis.
CANCER June 21 - July 22
You are a very patient person. You can fall asleep waiting for things to
happen. You have a keen memory and often recite boring, obscure things to
your few friends. Cancers are easily influenced and many have actually
drowned when told to go jump in the lake.
LEO July 23 - August 22
You are a very proud and trusting person. Others are constantly taking
advantage of you. You do not realize what is happening to you because
basically you are very stupid. You are the laughing stock of any group.
VIRGO August 23 - September 22
You are very methodical and like things in order. on the other hand, your
personal appearance is usually a mess. You think of yourself as
descriminating, while others think of you as cheap and selfish. You are
amoral.
LIBRA September 23 - October 22
You are very affectionate and sympathetic towards others. You enjoy
sobbing. You talk a great deal about justice, but no one trusts you. Most
Libras are alcoholics and dope fiends. People look at you with pity.
SCORPIO October 23 - November 21
You are a very domineering and opinionated person. You do not care who you
must step on to get to the top. you laugh during funerals. Most Scorpios
are shot in the back.
SAGITTARIUS November 22 - December 21
You have a vivid imagination and are always trying new things. Your
friends think you are a pervert. Honesty is so important to you that you
even admit to doing increadibly dumb things. Nudists are almost always
Sagittarians.
(
geocities.com/hanson_c)