LNN #507 "50th Issue Special"

Real News: Lee Norris Newsletter Back!

          Oregon City, OR, In a press-conference at 9:08am today, to a crowd of 3 reporters and Herman Golly throwing eggs, 50% share holder of the Pinchy-Norris Newsletter, Henry King and 25% share holder James Christiansen have anounced that they will be changing the of the Newsletter back to the Predecessor names, Lee Norris Newsletter. Henry was reported as saying, " I wanted to honor the late Bobot Lee Pinchy, so I decided to strip his name off of the newsletter."  What a very nice jesture.

Baptist Theory
Vacation Photo's

         Well for the last 4 weeks I have been on vacation in Bigcheese, Istanbul, visiting the vast cheese fields of Apple County, Anyway I came back when I heard of the Death of Bobot Lee Pinchy.  I was very surprised the 25% of the company went to me instead of say, Andrea Bonaparte of Jack Lyn PoPo.  Oh well anyway  I was going to share my photos but I left them in the Bathroom and you cannot see them anyway.  And I almost forgot Baptist Chat will not be seen until our season finale because I have to take care of business stuff.  It will be replaced by Classic Newsletter I am sure you will enjoy.
 

 Great Things in American History
Spam oh yeah

         This column will not be very long because I am very very mad.  It should have been me who got the 25% of the Newsletter, It should have been mine, just because I have only been here for 4 months and that Bobot had a bitter hatred of me just because I filled his car with cement and accused his dog of doing his little dooty in my yard, although he lived in another city, in another state.  Anyway Spam was created by two men who were trying to make lunch meat out of rats.  Now thats good eaten!
 

Commy Chat w/ fidel Castro
Pressure in Panama

         I thought I would update you on the trouble between Cuba and Panama.  It seems that Cuba offered Panama a very good deal, Cuba would invade Panama and Hostilily takeover the Canal to help them, the greedy ingrates that they are the refused.  It seems so very likely that Cuba and Panama might go into war and if that obnoxious little Island that is interferring keeps it up I will destroy them myself.  And also........
I HATE HENRY KING!
 

The Art of Sculpting the Contence of your Toilet Bowl

         Exactly How do you sculpt the contence of your toilet bowl you ask, well here we go.  First make sure no one flushes the toilet for a week, then begin.  Plunge your hands into the toilet bowl and grab what you can, you can also use the bobbing for apples stratigy and grab the stuff with your mouth.  Begin to glue the stuff together with a sauter gun and mold.  When it is completed it will work good as an appitizer at a dinner party.

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Redemption is Coming, Can you handle It?