Friday night you and your boys went out to eat
Then they hung out, but you came home around three
If six of ya’ll went out, then four of you were really cheap
Cause only two of you had dinner
I found your credit card receipt

I don’t know how dumb you think I am Justin, I know you were with her last night. You said you were going out with a bunch of guys. If that’s true why did you come home smelling like her. I’ve found receipts for dinners and hotels before. I just can’t live like this anymore. You know that I love you, I probably always will.

It’s not right, but it’s ok
I’m gonna make it anyway
Pack your bags up and leave
Don’t you dare come running back to me
It’s not right, but it’s ok
I’m gonna make it anyway
Close the door behind you
Leave the key
I’d rather be alone than unhappy

I’m asking you to leave tonight. I’m not going to live like this anymore. You’ve always come back to me, so I know on some level that you do love me. You just don’t love me enough to be with only me. I don’t even think you love her, you’re just afraid of being gay. We’ve been through this so many times. You always promise that it will never happen again, but it does happen again.

I’ll pack your bags
So you can leave town for a week
The phone rings and then you look at me
You said it was one of your friends
Down on 54th street
So why did 213 show up on the caller ID

I’ve been through all of this before
So how could you think
That I would stand around and take some more
Things are gonna change
That’s why you have to leave
So don’t turn around to see my face
There are no more fears and tears for you to see

I’ve packed your bags for you to go on interviews overnight. I know you don’t go alone. I know that sometimes you meet her. I know she calls here and you lie about it. I also know that she doesn’t know we’re lovers. I heard you tell her you love her. You might as well have ripped out my heart. She doesn’t love you; she loves what your name can do for her career. I know that you know it too. There’s no way you couldn’t know it.

Things have to change. I need to be with someone who isn’t afraid to love me. I’ve put up with this too long. I’ve forgiven too many times. I can’t do it anymore. I’m going to move on and begin my life. I know it won’t be easy. For more than a year you have been my life. I have to start living for me, not someone who is afraid to love me. I want someone who isn’t afraid to be seen in public holding my hand. I want someone who isn’t afraid to show the world that they love me. I want someone who isn’t afraid to let me love them.

I won’t let you see me cry anymore. I won’t let you see that I’m afraid you’ll cheat again. It’s not worth it to me. I need to keep my sanity. I need to be Josh again. I can’t be the someone who’s waiting at home for you anymore. I’m tired of being your dirty little secret.

Was it really worth you going out like that
See I’m moving on and I refuse to turn back
All of this time I thought I had someone who really love me
It turns out you were making a fool of me

It’s not right, but it’s ok
I’m gonna make it anyway
Pack your bags up and leave
Don’t you dare come running back to me
It’s not right, but it’s ok
I’m gonna make it anyway
Close the door behind you
Leave your key
I’d rather be alone than unhappy

When you come home tonight your bags will all be packed. All that I ask is that you just leave. Don’t try to make me believe you. I can’t do that any longer. I can’t let you hurt me anymore. I’ve hurt too long as it is. I need to move on. Please leave and don’t look back. I need you to do just this one last thing for me.

I can’t see your face as you leave me for the last time. I can’t see those beautiful eyes I get lost in when we make love. I know I’ll never be held in your loving embrace again. I know I’ll never taste those sweet lips or feel you inside me again. The worst part is never hearing your voice again. I’ll even miss the way you hog the bed and all of the covers. I know I hated the messes you’d always leave for me to clean up, but I’ll miss those too.

I hope that someday you realize what you had and threw away. She’ll never love you like I do. When you do finally see this, don’t come to me. I’m moving on, you’ll be too late. I’m gonna make it. You will too, only it will be without me. You had your chance and you threw us away. I won’t be your secret anymore. Goodbye Justin, I love you.

It’s not right, but it’s ok
I’m gonna make it anyway
Pack your bags up and leave
Don’t you dare come running back to me
It’s not right, but it’s ok
I’m gonna make it anyway
Close the door behind you
Leave the key
I’d rather be alone than unhappy

tbc
next: if i could turn back the hands of time