The meeting culminated into marriage. One which
came almost immediately under the shadow of Hariharan's non-happening career.
"For months on end, I would get to sing only the odd jingle or two,"
says Hariharan. "And yet, I wouldn't give up. I would be out the whole
day making futile rounds of meeting people, and come back, feeling low and
do riyaaz for six to seven hours at a stretch to work myself out
of depression."
However, it wasn't his physical presence or absence at home that worried
Lalita initially. It was his mental absence even when he was by her side.
"I used to be so coiled up all the time that I couldn't enjoy anything
completely," Hariharan admits. "The tension of not having achieved
anything was constantly at the back of my mind. It was especially awful
on our first New Year together, when we had to sit at home and watch television,
simply because we were too broke to go anywhere!"
Meanwhile, Lalita would sit for hours at the window at night, worrying about
his career and their life together. "I used to wonder what would happen
if Hari's career didn't take off soon," she says. "Where would
he fit, and where would I fit into his life... Then, I would go up to his
music room to listen to him doing his riyaaz and a large part of
my worries would disappear." |