twist

Twist

On that unlucky night
when i saw tears in your eyes,
when we were sitting by the road side
with your feelings of shyness, unsafely and loneliness in the fight.

I took a brave decision
to fight by your side,
to never let you engage alone in the fight
and to make your foes night too tight.

but soon i realized,
we are not friends any more
we are not together but alone,
because I failed to prove my strong words.

I couldn't lend you my shoulders to cry
because you never accepted my offer,
I couldn't stop the event and be by your side
because your foe was a friend of mine.
the day after I couldn't dry your tears
because you had other friends on whom you relied.
you made me distant, and I could not wash away your tears.

you didn't trust me,
how could i come near you.
my friend-ship couldn't help you
because for me you were never that kind.

that's why I am no longer your friend
that's why I am no more at your surroundings.

my friend-ship only hurts you,
it never helped you.
How can we be called friends then?
being together but far away from heart and souls.
how can we be then friends?

Sorry to say dear!
but we are not friends,
we do not have any relation.
only you proved to me is
that I am a stranger,
a stranger who cannot understand you,
who do not have patience and is possessive,
always interfering in your life.
that's all I am from your view.

If that is the case so,
then strangers have to go,
to a place which is silent,
to a place which he calls a home,
where he has friends and no foes,
where he has this diary, his past,
his dreams and his future aims.

where there is no place for you,
where he will forget all the memories associated with you,
except of those who stud by his side
except those who helped him washed away tears.

so lets forget the past behind
and enter the doors of future,
future that is not certain for you, for me.
so forgive me for my every sin.

This was a twist in my current life, It changed my position and the way I used to interact. with some friends. This incident showed me some facts about being a good friend or not. I couldn't help my friend. But every one knows the reason why? I am not possessive but yes I just warned my friend that be away from bad guys not from other people. I am never jealous, in my life time, I got jealous only once and that was teenage, I.L.M Peshawar . That's all I have to say, Such a close friend misunderstood me, that I am something else not a friend. I know the way I acted but my intentions were always clear. May be you all have never experienced a guy like me. And that's why all thought in the same way that I am like Obaid. Several times I have conveyed my message but still every one misunderstood and I have to return to my old path, Where my principles are stronger than my desires. And this time again I am choosing the hard way. Every one follow easy way but rare people chooses my way. And one more thing to add, I am not that person who when isolated by the opponents give up. I have never given up, yeah temporary for a few days its hard but i know making myself busy and diversifying my activities make me survive, this is the only art of forgetting. And I have master it in 5 years. But I never wanted nor I had ever expected that it will end this way. Although it has to be ended but not in this way. And today I just feel that I wish My friends remain happy for ever no matter i am there or not. Only their happiness matters. And I know one day, (that day won't be soon) my friends will realize why I chose this way. And very few people can go on my path, and some when choose my path always stuck by memories but I am not that one. I am stronger enough to survive every disaster. And this minor disaster for me is just a piece of cake. But only thing that matter for me is that I chose a friend, and first time I had a wrong decisions, but still being a friend I chose this way because my friend is happy being far from me. I hope now my friend can keep away from bad guys as I am no more there to inform them about others thoughts. For me, any one who just say a word against my friend, I will be there to have a stand. And that is my possessiveness. But interfering in friends personal life is never my business. I never stop my friends from making new friends. But always I and my friends wanted to protect the group not stop each other from personal contacts. Personal contacts are there but not part of the group. From my point of view for the best interest of group I expelled 2 people out of the group who used to fight with each other and was breaking the group. So that's the difference of views, from my view my group is still there. that's why I am not isolated. But what ever, I am still satisfied, but it shouldn't have ended like this. We had to go but not in this way. In start also I knew something will happen and just imagine I was the one who took this decision, and I was the one who at start said that we will leave for our real journey but in a manner that we should remember each other in good words. But this didn't happened. Right!! Any way what ever the ALLAH Almighty want, I am happy in his happiness. Because he knows the best. And I hope he also help my friends. Although I have a problem that my actions were opposite to my intentions that is why some one misunderstood my words of desires. but how can they don't know my story, when they know everything how can they think like that about me, But there are few people who knows the reality and the rest now will have the idea when they rethink. The journey never ends when one person dies, or leaves. every ones journey of life will continue with twists. So is mine. Only I desire was to have a good enjoyable time, but a friend whom was with me always used to make my mood off on every event. And on every event I also upset my friend, so that's the reason parting was in best interest of friend-ship.