..SURF GIVES ADVICE.. 

Who is Surf?: He is a surfer who feels compelled to help others

What type of advice can he give?:

Is Surf Educated?: Nope, so take it all with a grain of sand "in your bathing suit"

ARE YOU READY TO ASK SURF!!!

SURF WILL RESPOND EVERY WEEK TO SUBMITTED REQUESTS...

SURF'S LATEST ADVICE

Dear Surf, I am 40 years old and slightly overweight and want to surf but don't know how. Should I start? Am I able?

>>>Yo Braw, you sound like a major howlie. Surfing bodacious waves is hard man. Anyway I don't want any porkos out doggin my line ups. Surf suggest you not start, chickonas dig older men that are ripped with major muscles. Stop sucking twinkies and go to the gym. It will payoff...Surf

Hey Surf, I've always wondered what the difference is between a crocodile and an aligator. can you help me? also, what's the difference between blue cheese and gorganzola? help! Karl

>>> Aligators can be found on preppie shirts from the late 70's ('yuck Surf would not get caught dead in one') and a crocodile can't...Surf

>>> Karl Dude, Your stretchin Surf's talent. My bodacious food knowledge is limited to flavors of Ben and Jerrys, but here is what Surf thinks.. Blue cheese is depressed and Gorganzola is expressed!! "as in cut the..." ... Surf

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