* You believe every dog is a lap dog

* If you are cold, you put a sweater on your dog

* You have a picture of your dog in your wallet, but not one of your kids

* You often claim that it was love at first sight with you and your dog

* You have your dog talk to your friends on the phone

* You can't fully enjoy yourself without your dog

* No matter how large your bed is, it is not large enough for you and your dog(s)

* You spend more on clothes and food for your dog than you do for yourself

* You have no problem kissing your dog on the lips, even knowing where they've been

* You believe it is your duty to talk to, pat, and even feed every dog in the neighborhood

* You let the neighbor dogs sleep over

* You believe there is no such thing as a naughty dog

* Your vet and grooming bills exceed your rent

* When you need someone to talk to, your dog is your first choice

* You sit on the floor if the dog got in the chair first

* You talk to your dog when you are driving. She answers

* Your dog taught you to fetch and roll over

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