The Graft

THE GRAFT Deep beneath the darkened veil, down within the depths;

in the caverns of the mindless place,

where neither light nor sight doeth pierce....

there throbs a monster who sucks the life

from whence its own life begets.

Rich it is, and decadent....ruler above the earth....

All within to it does bow;

and all within of worth

upon its alter its possession to be,

to give it life and breath.

It feeds, it grows, it breathes...absorbing all in greed.

The hollow bones, sucked dry of life

lie scattered, dry as dust....

its feeding frenzy has left behind

in the wake of its gathering lust.

All pity choked, all wounds left bare.....oh butcher of life to be.

It sucks the marrow from the life, the breath of all that's free.

Its foulness sore, pervades each cell,

its stench invades each beat.....

of heart, of soul, of mind, of life

consuming all that's free.

Within the deep it feeds, it grows....ever increasing it is....

until every nerve, and fiber and sinew

within its clutches it holds.

Its life was sparked, its breath began, within my life of years gone by...

and deep within, with silent toil....it spread it sucking coil.

Thus years ago, in its sunless crypt, unseen, thus left unsealed....

its spirals grew, and stretched and stole

the life that in me lived.

And now I find, I have within, a demon, dark and deep....

no prying eye, no listening ear can ever hope to reach.

But its breath, which stench does permeate

not only my living day....its webs of fear come creeping in

to my dreaming life as well.

My thoughts it colors, day by day...

reactions within its hold it claims....

My choices I try in vain to keep, from out of reach of its sway.

I look around, I see the world, with lingering light o'er spread.

The gold tipped trees, the robins bold, the cockoo with stolen nest.

The bursting sun, the wild boar's fun, all held within life's fest.

Yet I, I long for place to find; a sweet drop of this life to taste....

And yet, in vain, for the monster inside,

to my drop of life lays claim.

This monster, it coils, it snakes its way, it breathes it own life

in to my day....

And never from its clutches can I ever hope to flee,

for its being lives in me.

So intwined, this grafted life....

it takes my joy and leaves its strife.

It drives me on, I know not where...

and my littles inside, who with this body I share...

their lives are painted with its gloom,

their hearts do shudder from its doom.

Completely in its snare, they abide,

for they have no where else in which to hide.

An ironic fact, with this monster I see....

for from out of its womb, some of my children were born.

In its digestion of me, I find it conceived....

and from our unwilling union was born....

when from out of my heart, and out of my soul,

with its claws, the pieces were torn.

How can these children have any hope,when this monster....

it is their sire???

And any life from me they begot, was put out by its fire?

For when I look and listen, inside....

When I close my eyes and I feel....

These little children, down deep they hide

and I wonder, are they for real?

With little hands, they cup their pink lips, as into my ears they breathe....

with shuddering tongue, and heaving lung,

they whisper this monster's name.

And what might you think this monster to be?

This monster that consumes all of our lives?

That sucks out the marrow of our day,

and haunts our nights with strife?

"'Tis fear, 'tis fear, 'tis fear," they say.

And yet...my mind, it wanders thus....

If 'fear' is its strands, its strength and its life

what beats within its heart

Tell me, what roots does this monster have,

what origin of life.....

that bears as its fruit, this frightening load....

this fear that beats in my heart.

Closer, and closer, it rises within...

up from the deep it does billow...

as if no longer content it be, to bow,

as a weeping willow.

"'Tis time!! My time has come!!" it shouts,

"to take possession of this soul!!!

This life I live, this life is mine,

forever in my hold!"

Oh God above, even You it tries,

to hide in our innermost soul.

To wrap up in fear, in terror and dread;

even You, to clutch in its hold.

You've promised your truth is a light to our path,

a light to our innermost being.

For the Word of God is powerful; it is light....

it brings freedom, and it is living.

Sharper than any two edged sword...

it pierces, "even to the division of spirit and soul."

A discerner of thoughts....

a divider of marrow and of joints.

Then God in heaven, hear now my prayer.....

as upwards I cast my eyes.

Can You not, with Your sword divide

This monster that is grafted inside?

But spare, I beg You, the children who hide.

For when you cut off the fear inside,

the fear who is their sire....

replace now his half, with Your strength, and with love of your fire.

Have mercy on us, for we are but dust....

and to dust we shall return.

But my prayer now is this, that to glory we'll be,

and not to the dust of the earth.

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