Hijab: I've been Liberated

It is late in the afternoon at the University of British Columbia
and I have been cooped up in this library for hours, trying to 
compose a thesis for my American Literature term paper. Deciding 
that a break would help clear my thoughts, I leave the confines of 
the library to sit outside, only to hear a female voice come up 
from behind me to ask: "Just how is it that you can live with 
yourself from day to day wearing that THING on your head and 
letting THEM control your life?"  Granted, it is an original line, 
a creative way to break the ice, yet why the code words? Only 
because I've been yelled at in public before for reasons connected 
to my appearance do I know what this woman means. 

Code word # 1: "head thing"= 30inch X 30inch yellow and maroon flower 
patterned polyester belend, a piece of cloth I happen to be wearing 
to cover my head and neck; Code word #2: "them"= all Muslim men 
who, sinisterlike with their dark beards, heavy accents, and 
hidden Uzi's get a rush out of making women their life-ling 
slaves. 

Having deciphered all this quickly, I turn to face the stranger-a 
cross looking thing-I smile politely and signal to the empty chair 
beside me: "Would you like to have a seat?" HIJAB, the head to 
ankle covering that leaves only the face, hands and feet visible 
in public, has made me a very patient Muslim woman. The brave 
individuals who have mustered the courage to verbally express 
their opinions about my scarf havent been the most trying. There 
are many who cant formulate words coherant enough to communicate 
their disapproval, and so, rely on simple gestures and sign 
language. Walking through downtown Vancouver, I've been fingered, 
spat on, scowled and cursed at. Stepping into an elevator, I onve 
traumatized a man who could do nothing but shuffle into the corner
of the empty lift and mutter "What the f---? WHAT THE 
F---?!?!?!?!" I have to take the agitation, the horror, even the 
hatred in stide. But never will i be silent about it.

I can ignore the flagrant distortions no more than i can deny the 
fact that i am a Muslim living in Canada. Who I am and what 
popular culture thinks i am, has become a tug-of-war--competition 
of who can explain the status of the Muslim hijab-wearer 
convincingly. The media tells the public that I am a weak freak of 
nature who has been forced to subjuct herself to the tyranny of 
Muslim fundamentalists. Catherine Meckes asseses that wearing 
hijab is "some kind of twisted logic" beacause it entraps women 
like animals in a cage. The Muslim dress code, she argues, 
is a form os hiding from society so that I dont have to deal with
the realities of my "natural habitat." Ms. Meckes seems to be 
familiar enough with the Western culture to know that women are 
constantly objectified, used as commodities, tools to sell beer 
and boost sales for the next football season. Sadly enough though 
she views women who wish to distance themselves from this 
commercial degredation with fear. She finds women who cover 
"disturbing" and wished that she didnt have to confront them on 
their "home turf." 

Pardon my feeble-mindedness, I've pinned my scarf on too tight and 
squeezed reason out of my brain....just WHO is running away from 
the truth? I have chosen to set myself apart from millions of 
Canadians, placed myself in the way of ridicule by a society that 
demands women to conform to certain ideals, I have refused to hide 
in the crowded university hallways and malls by looking the way 
Cindy, Cosmo, or Calvin Klein think I should- all because I'm a 
spinless caged rodent?!?!  I have rejected the hip-hugging jeans, 
the breast-enhancing halter tops, the poofy hair and made-up face, 
and accepted hijab so that I can be appreciated for my intellect 
and personality rather than my figure or fashion sense. When i 
face a classmate or colleague i can be confident that my body is 
not being scrutinized , my bra-strap or pantyline visible. I have 
repudiated the perverted values of our society by choosing to 
assert myself only through my mind. I understand my "natural 
habibtat" very well thank you.

I fully comperhend the distorted image of the "ideal woman", but 
the difference between me and the Catherine Meckes's of the world 
is that I am NOT afraid to defy those standards. Islam liberated 
me from THAT prison.

Perhaps hijab is so misunderstood because it is prescribed by a 
religion that makes bold, shocking statement: Women are precious 
creatures who have the right to be valued for who they are, and 
not what they can juggle. When i decide to start wearing hijab, my 
mother pulled me aside and posed this question: "If you found a 
diamond that was exquisite in every way, would you show it to all 
your friends, let them gawk at its dazzle, caress it, or would you 
covet the stone and protect it by preserving its natural splendor?" 
Once you bear something for all to see, the second you display 
something for its beauty, you objectify it and diminish its value. 
because its worth is bulit on its ability to attract, when it no 
longer elicits awe from onlookers it becomes worthless. Is it a 
wonder that neck lines keep plunging every year?- more cleavage 
means women wont bore oglers, the commercial industries, 
and the rest of society for awhile. But when will those skirts quit 
shortening?? For how long will women remail sex objects??

Islam tells us that every woman is a jewel and when she respects 
herself enough to preserve her beauty for herself and her loved 
ones, she rejects being objectified by a society which does NOT 
value her. Only the dearest pple in my life know me without hijab 
beacause they love me enough to value ALL of me. John and Jane Doe 
dont love me or care for me, so why must I meet their notions of 
an "ideal woman" if they are meaningless to me? It is the desire 
to please popular culture that makes 15 year old girls want to fit 
Kate Moss's jeans by sticking their fingers down their throats and 
wretching three times a day . It is the unattainable Perfect Body 
society has conjured that make "fat", "ugly" girls splatter 
themselves on sidewalks because theyre just "not thin and pretty 
enough". AND THEY TELL ME ISLAM OPPRESSES WOMEN?? 

I am thankful that I am not suicidal or psychologically unbalanced 
because i can't meet the demands of my culture. I am fortunate that 
my concerns and goals in life lie on a higher plane than the 
dictates of a pretty fashion industry. I am quite content with my 
religion, for it values my power to achieve great things through 
my mind, not through my body. Whether I am physically beautiful or 
not, you have no clue. Perhaps this fact is disturbing for 
Catherine Meckes and the library stranger because they are not 
ready to meet a woman who can get by without her looks. Then 
again, perhaps it is because they are just ignorant of the (WHAT 
IS IT?) facts. Either way, I dont need anyone's sympathy, I am not 
really that scary, and your anger does me no harm. 

I am not under duress, or a male-worshipping female captive from 
the barbarous Arabian deserts. 

I'VE BEEN LIBERATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!