Here is my letter in retort to the editorial published in the San Francisco Examiner titled: "Fight Over Adoption Secrecy"!
It would be one thing, if adoptees did not know that they were adopted, In my case, I am a 39 year old male adoptee. Granted birth parents have rights, and in all actuality, But, unless there are circumstances surrounding the adoption that warrant closed records, After all, as adults, aren't we supposed to be held accountable for our actions? One more point. Are you aware of how expensive it is to have a professional search performed?
but once they know, the mind takes over!
As they say, "Curiosity killed the cat!"
I have known since I was six years old, that I was adopted,
for the adoption was finalized well after my seventh birthday.
Why is it, you may ask, that I've waited this long to begin a search?
Basically, I did not wish to hurt or offend my adoptive parents, whom I love dearly.
My adopted mother has passed on.
Its been over 5 years now, and my adopted father has encouraged me, "To find out who I am."
He knows it has not been easy for me.
I put my adoptive parents through hell,
all the way through my teenage years and beyond.
I had a very reckless disposition,
due to low self esteem, and a lack of self worth.
I was searching for answers in all the wrong places, and in all the wrong ways.
This is all directly related to my adoption,
or the feeling of confused and bewildered abandonment, that came with it.
Is it necessary for adoptees to go through their entire lives in this detached and uncertain way?
Absolutely not, with a little help from the bureaucracy!
they have done adoptees a huge favor, by choosing life, for us!
I thank the Lord and my birth mother on a regular basis
for providing me with the gift of life!
such as rape or incest,
the records should be made available to responsible adult adoptees.
And, if there are extenuating circumstances surrouding the adoption,
should the adoptee be told about it at all?
And as parents, aren't we held accountable for or children's actions?
So how come birth parents seem to be exempt from this common rule of civilization?
Why should adoptees or searching birth parents be exploited, by some search organization,
when the information could be made available for virtually no or little cost?
Once we know, that we are adopted, we will search.
It is only a matter of how.
Through legal or illegal means?
Haven't we, as adoptees, been put through enough already?
It must end somewhere!
David L. Blatter
Proud Former Member of Bastard Nation
db49erfan1@yahoo.com
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