10 ways to drive your human crazy

• Demand attention by insisting on trying to eat any reading material which may be in use. The Sunday Paper works best for this. There is so much crinkley paper to make lots of noise with!
• Encourage excersise by hiding or running away with the mail.
• Verbalize a lot and possibly resort to destroying furniture to keep the food dish full.
• Wake your humans up one minute before the alarm clock by sticking your paw up their nose. Works every time.
• Bark loudly to alert sleeping humans that there may be a piece of paper dancing around the yard with the wind. Also, you may alert your human of the fact that someone may even be driving by the house.
• To gain the most attention in the shortest amount of time, sit and stare (at nothing apparent to the human) and don't move. This will drive them nuts, and will prompt them to get down on the floor with you. You can do the same to a wall or ceiling and the bravest of humans will start believing in UFO's in a hurry!
• Show them who is boss! Get UNDER the covers on the bed! Also, commandeer the pillow!
• Whenever you run around the house at 423 mph, you should incorporate your Human as a Rebound Spot. This teaches them to pay attention to you!
• Train your Human to give you FRESH water every single day! If they do not, start sticking your face in their water cup!
• When your Human yells at you, for something you may or may not have done, be sure to suddenly, as if you just thought of it and your very life depends on it: yawn.