The history of Steph's recovery as taken from e-mails

10/15/98

Dear Pastor Ford:
At about 5:30 am this morning my wife, Stephanie, was in a serious accident and at 2:30pm she still hasn't regained consciousness. She is in the University Hospital in Colombia MO in the Surgical intensive Care Unit, she does not respond to stimuli but does become agitated from time to time and they sedate her to keep her from injuring herself further.
She has 3 fractured ribs and two injuries on her head and minor scrapes and bruises on the outside of her body, but is bleeding inside her head, they don't know if there is damage to her neck or spine yet. I will be going out to Missouri soon as I can get my car licensed ( Monday ) and have no way of knowing what will happen after that...Lab reports will be in at 3:pm our time and I'll know more at that time....Pray that I will be strong and be aware of the leading of the Holy Spirit and act accordingly and that Steph's pain will be minimal and for her recovery will be swift according to the will of God....

Stray

10/16/98

Stephanie is in a coma at the University Hospital in Columbus MO as a result of an accident Thursday am. She has 3 fractured ribs, no abrasions or lacerations, but severe trauma to the head in two areas and has a shunt in her head to drain of fluid that is creating pressure on the brain, She does not respond to stimuli of any kind as of 4am on Friday, There is no way of telling at this point if she will recover or
not, although she has moved all of her limbs.

10/16/98

She can't have any flowers or gifts of any kind in her room but she can have balloons

Her condition is stable and unchanged, they are keeping her sedated right now till the swelling in her head goes down, in a day or two. She is responding to pain stimuli, she is being fed with a tube and she has an IV and a shunt, x rays showed no damage to spine so they raised her head a little. If you put something in her hand she will squeeze it, something like a new born infant but they think it is an unconscious reaction at this time. when the medicine starts to wear off she starts struggling and
pulling at her gown and tubes, I told them that's just normal that she always wakes up grouchy.

Her mother and father are there with here all the time and her sister Cherry is there days. The hospital gave them all beepers to wear to keep in contact..

I have about got things wrapped up here. Derald, my brother is going to load my car on his lowboy trailer along with a container and we will ride together to Columbia starting Sunday afternoon.

I gave the hospital Derald's beeper number so they could reach us if they had too.

I know that Steph can't have any things in her room, but if anyone wants to send her a message by this e-mail address I will print them out and present them to her when I get there, she will probably be awake then.

10/17/98

Steph is about the same, her family is convinced that she is responding to them but nothing real obvious, the Dr's don't think so. At this time they want her to wake up and become aware of what is going on around her, the medication that she is on is to calm her and make her comfortable not to knock her out. and the sooner she will respond the better at this point. She is still hooked up to every machine man has devised for life support. She went for another scheduled cat scan today and no change in the brain, ( there is no physical damage ) her brain pressure is 15, what ever that means, and a slightly elevated temperature.

I called the florist and ordered a balloon for her and they delivered 8 balloons and I guess one of them
was huge, so they had to be taken out of the room. Sheesh!!

I'll be finishing packing tonight, and will load the car on the trailer deck of my brother Derald's truck
tomorrow and head to Columbia MO. I have a lap top and will try to keep in touch as we travel and
when I'm at the hospital on a daily basis for a while..

10/18/98

Arrived in Columbia 3am and went up to see Steph ... it was hard for me to recognize her with all the swelling and black and blue eyes and tubes, braces, bandages, electrodes. They tried to let her breath on her own yesterday and she couldn't, she was fading in and out of consciousness for the 20 minutes that I was there I couldn't get a handle on any consistent reaction to voice, I honestly couldn't tell if what I was saying was getting though, she squeezed my hand but she squeezed her gown in the same manner, so...I told her what all the people back home had said in thier e-mail,
the best I could remember and tried to tell a joke or two, but ........

10/19/98

Thank you for all your e-mail, it's a comfort to know that so many people care even though there isn't much that can be said that hasn't all ready been said. Steph's condition hasn't improved at all and now she has a worsening case of phenomena to deal with. I think this will be the last update unless there is something specific to write about. Several times a day I drive my car through heavy traffic to the hospital, turn into the dimly lite parking garage provided to those who have loved ones in the hospital. I pass hordes of people, most in groups of two or three talking in soft tones about an individual or event that brought them here. I walk down a long carpeted hall way to the elevator which takes me to the 6th floor, and walk down another long hallway till I get to the double doors of the neurological intensive care unit where a phone hangs conspicuously on the wall. Dialing 2-2115, I get the woad clerk who relays my request to enter to Stephanies nurse, who then decides if I can come in or wait for a few minutes. As the huge door gives way to the pressure applied to the wide bar that unlatches it, a new and unfamiliar world emerges full of strange sounds and nurses and doctors bustling around in their lab coats and surgical gowns with stethoscopes around their necks. A nurse greets me with a smile and reassuring voice and usheres me in to a room with a nurses station in the middle with cubicles all around it partitioned off with sliding curtains. Steph's cubical is in the corner and you approach form the foot of the bead. You can't see her face at first for all the tubes and neck brace and when you lean over her you look for features that are recognizable as Stephanie. Her face is swollen and black and blue, and with tube going in and out of every where there is a place to stick a tube. There is no way of knowing if she understands what I am telling her, but I go over the course of events of that day and talk about the e-mails I get, I hope that mentioning names of friends in Washington will spark some fond memories and be therapeutical, but...........
Sometimes I try to follow tubes to see which of 4 machines they are hooked up to and what they do, but I give up. There is a monitor above her bead that monitors more bodily functions I didn't know we all had, but the hardest thing for me to deal with is when her mother comes in and pleads with
her daughter to wake up, watching her child for any sign of response. We are all going through difficult emotions but I feel my pain is nothing in comparison to Stephanies mother is going through now.

10/20/98

Yesterday when I went in to visit Steph her skin was much better, before it felt like a balloon that you put just a little too much water in, when you were a kid. She also was using her eyes more, so we hope that is a good sign. It may have been a slip, but the nurse said there is damage to the brain and before this they were saying no.
Steph still is not breathing on her own, she has phenomena real bad, but they can control how much her respirator works and how much she has to work to breathe and they have tried to wean her from the tube but she isn't ready yet.
They are looking for response to command, they figure if she can put one thumb up or two fingers up, that is communication, anything less is wishful thinking,
I got an dive apartment of my own, better get a job though and quick, was offered a job for $6.00 an hr. I'm holding out for more.
I found out that the 15 was ICP Internal Cranial Pressure and they regulate that with a valve on a little tube coming out of her head.

10/20/98

Just got back from visiting Steph and there was levels of consciousness that we have never seen before. She had her eyes open wider than before and it was a focused look and she moved her gaze from one person to the next as they talked. I never had much faith in the squeeze the
hand thing but tonight it wasn't just a squeeze it was more like a death grip, I think she recognizes people and I think she understands what is being said when she is not drugged up.
She also had her neck brace off.. and they are going to do an operation to drain the excess brain fluid from her brain into her stomach. She is still not using her right hand at all.

10/21/98

Thank you for your letters. I wonder what the future will be like with Steph, she seems to recognize individuals, I hope that is not just wishful thinking. There is no real communication going on yet, and she is not moving her right hand at all, she really has a mean grip in the left one though, it's far more aggressive than simply gripping something put into your hand, the thing that I am puzzled with is that she does not just clasp your hand she works it with her fingers and sometimes she will even loose
your hand and sometimes she will search for your hand with hers and sometimes she just grabs her gown and starts working her gown with her fingers,,,,

10/30/98  .....  e-mail sent by Stray's brother to his wife while visiting Stray

Am at Stray's
well leave this evening ,going to see Steph ,after we do laundry
this place Stray is living in is very small, all one room, but only $250.00 a month
Stray all ready is starting to do badly
I think I have A load from Phoenix well be going to tx, San Antonio area, not set in stone yet.

11/02/98

I really hesitate to say too much about Steph cuz of the sensitivity of it, I hope she don't remember any of this because it truly worse than hell, while we were visiting she woke up and something was wrong but there is no way to communicate and she was in an extremely agitated state, one feels so totally helpless.   don't know if she was aware of who she was or who we were there is no way to tell, she was either in horrible intensive pain some where in her body or plum scared out of her mind for some reason. We can't do any thing to help this condition.

11/03/89

Steph is still not coherent, spent a few hrs with Cheri yesterday and we had a good visit. I can't stay here, my health is going down hill it's just a matter of time so I'll be headed to CA the last week in November but I'm going to stop and visit along the way so maybe the 2nd week in December I'll show up. Well keep in touch along the way..I have to get real serious about making a living and I can't rely on my talents so I'll do something else.. I'm still interested in buying and selling,,, I'm looking in to doing a little of that here just to get the hang of things..

11/04/98

HI
Didn't go visit Steph this evening and will not, seen her this am.
The Dr.'s took her breathing tube out but she was not able to breathe with out it so they stuck it back in. I helped Margie with her computer today, she brought everything but the power cord but we went and bought a new modem anyway I put it in but will have to wait til they go down to their place next week to get the power cord and the spike suppressor bar and then she will have her computer here in Columbia, she is complaining about not having her e-mail. Took the CB out of their car that I put in when we moved from CA. Did my laundry at the laundry mat, came home and checked the e-mail and downloaded the photos that Fay had sent me and printed them out.

I think I want to go see if I can keep my house in Ephrata..............( instead of moving to CA ) I think I can and I want to try....

11/04/98

I just got back from visiting Steph, she is the same, today the tube comes out. (veneration) Norm and Margie, Steph's parents, said that Steph followed verbal commands from the nurse today, funny how we hang on to the smallest detail.
I have to face the fact that I can't live here unless I take all the drugs and my insurance don't cover me here in MO anyway. So the sooner I can get established to where I can support myself the better. Maybe if Steph remembers me or want's to live with me then I can have the means to support her when the time comes..which
the earliest projection would be one year. There is a line of thought that just after the accident that there may have been a time she didn't breath and may
have starved the brain of oxygen for too long.

11/6/98

Did have an enjoyable time at Dean's ( my oldest son, that I went to visit) and that kid really does have his act together. I'm not used to baby's, (Steph's and my first graddaughter) but I held it a couple of times. and we just visited for two days.....
I may not be able to save the house in WA but I have to try.

11/06/98

Steph had the breathing tube removed from her mouth and surgically installed in her neck, I'm not sure that that is good but at least it will allow the congestion in her lungs to clear. She responded to "I love you" twice today with a big smile and I watched as the nurse took her right hand and asked her to raise one finger then raise 2 fingers and then make a fist and she did it perfectly and immediately,
but she was unable to follow voice commands with the left hand at all.
I looked back as I was leaving the room and she was watching me leave so there is definitely thought process going on there..... She has no facial expressions except for a response to something some one said and it goes away immediately. I think she
has to relearn all of her muscle control and her body is not doing what she want's it to. but we are incouraged by what we saw today.

11/07/98

I had a real conversation with Steph last night, although it amounted to something that resembled 20 questions and she has only 4 responses, nod, shake her head, smile and frown, and it lasted for only 10 minutes and she drifted off, but it
was coherent. This morning she doesn't remember a thing and was for the most part in la la land. But I think we will have our Stephanie back in time, a little worse for the wear maybe. I regret that at this time I am called to Washington to take care of some business, it couldn't come at a worse time and there is no way out of it. But I'll be back to visit her as often as I can. I will see her in about an hr and then I'll leave early
in the am, spend the week end with my son in Missoula Montana.

11/08/89

I had a nice visit with my son and brother in law in Missoula and arrived yesterday in Ephrata, WA . made a few stops and visited for a while, but now the work starts, finishing up details in WA. Exploring my options.
I may not be able to get insurance in CA, where I would like to establish residence, and I am discovering that there may be some public assistance that is available to me at this time, so until I know .... everything is up in the air.
Margie, Stephanie's mother e-mailed me a couple day's ago about Steph but no real news as of that time, Cheri, Steph's sister was involved in an accident and ended up with whiplash, that with Steph's brother falling off a ladder
a couple weeks before and fracturing his wrist and tail bone, the medical industry is having a hay day with the States. What ever develops from my being in WA, I feel my place is in MO for the time being, but it's not just being in MO, it's all
in how I get there and having life's little ducks all in a row when I go.

11/09/89

I don't think I will be able to get insurance in CA that is affordable that will cover my arthritis, but I'm still looking. The people I know in town seem to think I would do good if I opened up another sign shop, and I have gained a few allies
along the way it seems, and I haven't made everyone mad at me.
Elaine built a fire in the fire place last night, first time I enjoyed a fire in my own home, it was really an pleasant experience for me.
The weather here is a little gloomy, I never noticed before how desolate this place is this time of the year, must have had my mind on other things then.
I haven't maintained my diet very well and I could have done better. So now I'm trying to get back with the program, I walked about a mile this am and will have salad for lunch, need to go get me some water to drink,, will do that after I take Kelly to school.
If I can generate a certain amount of gross sales in signs then I can go into Biz and make the payments on this place, and if not then I can't make the payments on this place and will have to move on to other things. I do have a financial consultant that I am staying in close touch with, just for an anchor of reality.
BUT every thing is up in the air now, I'm just poking around trying to find out what is the best thing to do, it will be the end of December before I will know for sure..
I wish I had a Bosh here to make cheese and butter, Elaine does have a Osterizer though... I enjoy having Elaine and the kids around, I must be getting older. I try to help her out as much as possible whether out being a
pain in the you know where... I hear that Steph is coming right along in her recovery, It just slays me to have to be here now. but I want to fly back for X-mas.
However things end up it would be nice if I could have a place ( where ever that may be ) for her to belong, if she decides to come stay with me.

11/23/98  Sent by Steph's Sister

Happy Holidays to All:

Steph continues to make progress. Her spirits are good and she is working hard on various therapies. She is on physical therapy to get the left leg working again. Apparently her leg does not respond to her brain's command, so she is in essence retraining the leg to respond via a "different route" through the brain. But yesterday she, with help from a therapist and my dad, walked up and down a flight of stairs. She also is walking
the length of a hallway with a walker. It is not easy for her, but she gives it her all and I know that she will regain the use through hard work.

Of course, a part of her extraordinarily fast recovery is due to the love and devotion of my parents. They are there each and every day to be her "cheering section" as well as to help her with things she is still unable to do completely by herself. The world would be a much better place if everyone had such wonderful parents.

She is still working on her swallowing. Some part of her throat isn't opening as much as it should. But she is able to eat at least some food...she had some chocolate pie a couple of days ago and I know she, like I, is chocolate lover so she enjoyed that!

If any of you would like to give her spirits a boost this Christmas season, I know she would enjoy a phone call. Her voice has improved enough now that she is able to talk on the phone. You might think she sounds a little breathless, but she is working on that with a therapist and is making progress on that also. So if you call, just know that her voice will be a little breathless sounding and not real strong, but it is not uncomfortable for her to talk. The phone number if (573) 817-2703, then just ask for Steph Well's room and they will transfer you.

I think those of us who love Steph have a great
deal to be thankful for this Christmas season.

Merry Christmas,

Sent by Steph's Sister

I saw Steph on Tuesday but didn't get this note out, so I had better get going.

She was moved to the Rusk Rehabilitation Hospital on Tuesday afternoon. Mom says she is doing good, but is certainly has her moods
now!

On Tuesday a.m., before they moved her, we went to see her at the hospital. I had seen her on Monday evening and she was smiling, etc. But on Tuesday a.m., she tried her best to ignore us!! She wouldn't look at us or really communicate much with us. I said "You mean I drove for 2 hours to get here and you aren't going to even talk to me" and she
shook her head "no" and closed her eyes. It really was kind of funny how she just chose to ignore us. This is the first time she acted like that...shows the stubborn States coming out!

But it is so WONDERFUL to see her personality coming out again.

I think she was probably upset as she knew she was moving and was unsure what
to expect. They have told us from the beginning that she will have periods of anger and that it is part of the brain injury and not to take it personally!!

Anyway, we had a good laugh when we left over her little temper tantrum!

The trach is out completely so she can talk a little, her voice is not strong yet... it will take some time I am sure.

She is looking wonderful. She has great color in her face. We went out and bought her some sweat suits for the rehab hospital and a pretty nightgown. I am making her a couple of sweat suits today.

My neck and back (from the whiplash) hurt quite a bit, but I can work for an hour or so and then lay down for another hour to get rid of the aching. I saw an orthopedic doctor on Monday as the pain in my back was severe. She told me it will take anywhere from a month to several months for it to heal. If it isn't better by December 1st (when I see the dr. again) then I will begin physical therapy. But I am suppose to keep active as much as I can.

Sent by Stephanie and her mother

Hi. I am trying my first attempt at using the computer since the accident. so bear with me!
I can move my left leg better, although the L knee still buckles and some times the calf wants to go into the shakes in the muscles. My swallowing is less than what you could wish for, too, but I am making all attempts to correct it. I have 4 or 5 different problems in my throat, only 2 they are not worried about . I have to keep my fluids intake up to 1500cc per day. I have thickener in it to
prevent my choking on it. because the accident caused them to put me on a vent , and between it and the trach for almost a month my throat don't send the correct signsl thru so that the right valves will open or close pluis my throat is RAW. Mom helps me keep track of how much I
need to drink that day yet. I have full use of my R shoulder

That's about all I have to tell you about me. Sounds like Ardith and Merle are doing well. I have Physical therapy for 1 hour of one on one with a physical therapist two days a week. I tell Bev that she is as tough on me as a Nazi. I'll tell you you feel the pain when she makes you move!
The other three days a week I have the triple special! This is organized for people who have had a stroke(1) or a spinal cord injury(2), and (we must not forget the !) head injury(3). We work
together as a group on these days. On Tuesdays we work out in the pool.

So altogether, I'm doing pretty good!!!!!

Stephanie


PS by Marge (Steph's Mother)

There are days when things go really well and then there are days when nothing wants to work right! Sometimes her memory is good and other times it seems to be retrogressing. It is really hard to know just where she is in her recovery.

Today I had her at the computer all morning doing computer games so she wouldn't just go back to bed and sleep. I feel one of the reasons her mind doesn't always function real sharply is that she spends too much time sleeping and not enough time working it. That is about to stop. I also told her it was time for her to do some e-mailing so this is her first attempt.

On Tuesdays sometimes Steph and I go to Camdenton and help Norm with the paper route. She is really slow in wrapping papers, but it gives her something to do where she feels she is helping--and every paper she rolls is one we don't have to!!

4/20/99  Sent by Steph's Sister Cheri

I just wanted to send a short note to everyone to give you my "update" on Steph. 

She is doing really well...it makes me SO happy to see her determination to become   self-sufficient.  Her spirits are great and are helping her with the great strides forward she is making.

There are still  many things that are a struggle for her... and I am sure will continue to be so for a while yet... but I can see a little more progress each time I see her.

She still needs a walker to help support herself when walking but she is working toward using a cane only... hopefully someday soon.  Her left leg still does not move easily...sometimes it follows her "orders" and sometimes it doesn't.

Her swallowing is continuing to improve slowly. She is determined that this is a good time to lose the weight she has wanted to lose for some time so she is careful with what she eats.

She is now able (most of the time) to swallow liquids without the thickner she has been putting in the past 5 months, but there are still times when it just doesn't go where it is suppose to.

It also seems like her voice is beginning to return to normal.  Every once in a while her "old" voice breaks through for a few words.

And best of all, I see the old Steph there more and more.  Her memory continues to be a bit of a problem, but it is also continuing to improve.

Steph and I have talked and we both agree that she still needs to stay here for a while. That way she can continue to receive the outstanding therapy that has made all of these wonderful improvements  possible.  I cannot tell you all what a wonderful job Rusk Rehabilitation Hospital has done.

I think more each week that I see her that she will someday be able to resume a great deal of her past life.  I am still unsure if she will ever be able to nurse again, and Steph and I have talked about this possibility.  But with her determination I am beginning to think anything is possible some day.

She has been losing a great deal of hair, most likely from all the medications she must
take.  But Steph, Mom and I went wig shopping last week and she got a really cute wig that looks great on her.  She in now a "redhead"... she said she had always wanted to be one... and with her fair skin and freckles the red hair looks very natural!    Our poor family now has 3 redheads to deal with!!!

Anyway...it is wonderful for me to be able to spend this time with her and watch all of her progress.  It is especially so when I think of how far she has come the past 6 months......

She enjoys your emails...she will be at my house most weekends so feel free to send them here anytime.

Cheri 

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