Elephant Tusks!

- last updated 1st August 2001

Hello. Today I'm going to write about elephant tusks. As you may have guessed from the title. There wouldn't be much point in me calling an article 'Elephant Tusks' if I weren't going to write about elephant tusks. That is because it is mislabelling a product, and mislabelling a product is a phenomenon that I am very much against. Although it could be said that labelling 'mislabelling a product' as a 'phenonemon' would be a mislabelling in itself, because a phenomenon is, by definition, something that is out of the ordinary, and the act of mislabelling a product has, sadly, been going on for a very long time and occurs fairly frequently. For example, McDonalds often market their burgers as "delicious", which is patently not true. Moreover, there was an advert in the 1980's for a car, which featured a family driving up in said car into the forest for a picnic, where they were accosted by bears, who, instead of stealing the picnic, nicked off with the car. The implication was that either the car was so easy to drive that even bears could do it, or that the car tasted so incredibly good that bears would take it instead of sandwiches, cake, jelly, crisps, fruit or any of the other delicious things that so frequently make up a picnic. Neither of these interpretations could possibly be true in the real world, thus leading us to assume that some slight product mislabelling was going on. And product mislabelling, ladies, gentlemen and marsupials, goes on all the time! I can't think of another example right now, but the two I gave you above should be more than enough. So I'll be going now, with a cheery cry of "Yodel eh, yodel eh, yodel eh hee ho!" Bye!

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