Final Fantasy VIII Another Life

*WARNING: THERE MAY BE MINOR SPOILERS IN THIS CHAPTER*

Hikaru Shino sighed as he leaned back on his chair, as he stared at the
computer screen in front of him, biting his thumbnail in frustration. A bad
habit that he wasn't able to get rid of in his younger days, he turned to
look at his roommate, Kenichi Miyamura, a tall, lanky young man with short,
black hair, who was staring at him as though he had gone mad.

"I'm not going to Aya-san's party. Period." Hikaru tried not to look
irritated. It had been the fourth time that Kenichi had asked him.

"Are you REALLY sure? I mean, Aya-chan's your best friend"

 he thought sadly. "I'm sure, Ken. I need to finish
this."

"I really can't believe you passing up on an oppurtunity to party just
because of that." Kenichi waved his arm towards the computer, indicating
the project Hikaru was working on.

Hikaru glared at Kenichi. He was not in the mood to be bothered with things
like this.

Kenichi held up his hands, as if indicating surrender. "Alright, alright,
but just don't blame me if you miss all the fun." With that, he made his
way out of the dorm room.

Drinking tea from the mug on his desk, Hikaru stood up to get some more tea
from their makeshift kitchen. The silence in the room only lasted a few
seconds before a familiar voice interrupted it once again. "Are YOU really
sure you're not going?"

Hikaru's answer was to grab a pillow from his bed and throw it at the head
sticking out of the slightly open doorway. Kenichi pulled his head outside
and closed the door quickly before the pillow could hit him, laughing.

Hikaru smiled in spite of himself. With that, he sat back down and his
chair and continued the grueling task of sorting out the bugs in his
project.


A good five hours later, Hikaru laid on his bed, exhausted. Kenichi was
still not back from the party. He glanced at the clock. <1 AM...Like he'd
be back THIS early, > he thought with some amusement.

Taking a clean towel from the pile of clothes beside the bathroom, he took
a long and refreshing shower, getting ready for bed. As soon as he slumped
on his bed, the door opened and Kenichi came in. "Oh man, Hikaru. You just
missed the party of the century!"

"Let me guess...all the girls stripped and danced naked for you?" Hikaru
gave him an amused smile.

"Nothing like that...although I wish that would happen." Kenichi chuckled.
"You should have gone, Hikaru. You would have seen just how sexy Aya was,
especially with that body-hugging outfit of hers."
Hikaru groaned. 
"You stink like hell."

Kenichi took a sniff from himself, before muttering, " Must be the
alcohol..." With that, he
entered the bathroom. Soon, shower sounds could be heard, mixed with some
off-key singing.

"Pipe down, will ya? I'm trying to sleep here." Hikaru put his head under
his pillow.

"I thought you'd might want me to sing a lullaby for you." Kenichi chuckled
with some amusement.

 Hikaru mused while trying to shut his
brain off from Kenichi's listening. But as soon as he closed his eyes, his
exhaustion from earlier finally took over and sleep came readily to him...

*****


Hikaru opened his eyes. He was standing on a vast field of flowers, under a
clear, blue sky.

 Hikaru took a step forward. Looking around, he saw
only flowers and petals, being blown by the wind into the air in a
kaleidoscope of colors and fragrances.

Hikaru breathed in the scents of the flowers around him. 
With that, he flopped down on a flowerbed and enjoyed the tranquility of
the scene in front of him. He has always enjoyed watching nature since his
childhood, helping him forget the troubles of the world and making him feel
peace within his heart.

As Hikaru stretched his hands over his head, he noticed a single white
feather being blown by the wind together with the petals.  Pulling himself into an upright position, his eyes
followed the feather's direction, and noticed someone standing in a
distance from him.

 Her back was turned on him, and she was
wearing a blue, sleeveless blouse, as blue as the sky itself, the bodice
snugly fitting her hips, and had a long tail of cloth extending towards the
ground. Her shoulder-length, black hair partly covered a pair of
embroidered wings sewn onto the back of her outfit. Standing, Hikaru called
out to her.

The girl didn't seem to hear him, as she continued to stand as still as a
stone, the rippling of her hair and cape the only signs of movement from
her.

"Hey!" Hikaru called out again, this time walking slowly towards her.

Again, the girl continued to ignore him, watching the petals dance to the
tune of the wind in front of her, as Hikaru continued his way towards her.

When he reached the girl, Hikaru lightly tapped her shoulder. Slowly, she
turned towards him, her graceful movement accenting her feminine curves
beneath the outfit, as the world suddenly turned white...

*****


Hikaru woke up groggily, his fatigue from the night before not entirely
gone. He looked over his shoulder at the other bed in the room. Kenichi, so
far, was still in dreamland and isn't gonna wake up until before lunchtime.

 , he mused as went by to his daily morning
routine, namely taking a quick shower and getting ready for his morning
classes. Glancing at the mirror for a quick check, he ran his hand through
his short, somewhat unruly brown hair, took the books on top of his desk,
and quietly made his way out of the room, leaving the still-asleep Kenichi.

Books in hand, he decided to get himself a quick bite. Walking briskly
towards a nearby diner, he noticed a very familiar girl waving at him.
Smiling at her, he waved back as she quickly walked towards him.

"Shinami-chan, ohayou." A pretty girl with straight, black hair flowing all
the way to her back, she had cute, little black eyes that could only come
from someone who was from Chinese descent. She was wearing a sleeveless,
blue sundress that was cut short above the knee, exposing her shapely legs
that could make any guy stare.

"Ohayou, Hikaru-kun." Shinami had always been one of Hikaru's closest
friends, and ever since the incident with Aya, she was the one who had
helped him get back on his feet. Since then, he already had harbored
feelings for her. Special feelings more than friendship. Together, they
headed towards the diner.

"By the way, I didn't see you yesterday at Aya-san's party." Shinami looked
at him as if she were scrutinizing his every move.

"I...I had something I really need to attend to." Hikaru sputtered out.

"Really? Kenichi said you had a bad cold yesterday...You seem fine now."
Shinami had an amused grin on her face.

"Uh...gomen."

Shinami gave him a concerned look. "I know you're still uneasy whenever
Aya-san's near, but you really have to get over this."

"Ah...yeah, I guess so..." Hikaru managed a weak grin.

Shinami sighed, as they entered the diner, and sat at a booth near the
door. "Well, I guess I couldn't really blame you for feeling that way."

They continued with their conversation as they ate, before continuing on to
the university. Hikaru then accompanied her to her college building before
heading towards his.

As he arrived in his classroom, he noticed that it was still empty. Funny.
The room should be packed by now. Taking his usual seat by the window, he
watched the people outside stroll about, going by their usual duties.
Sometimes, he enjoyed such moments.

"Is this seat taken?"

So occupied was he in watching the people outside that he didn't notice the
question. It was the tap on his shoulder that snapped him out of his
reverie. Facing the person who tapped him, he caught his breath.

Standing beside him was probably the most beautiful girl Hikaru has ever
seen. Long waves of black hair, with streaks of brown on the sides, flowed
down past her shoulders, framing a heart-shaped face with pretty, dark eyes
and rosy lips. She was wearing a white shirt cut low enough to show two
silver rings hanging from a chain around her neck and tight, blue jeans
that showed off her shapely figure.

Hikaru tried hard not to stare, although failing miserably in the process.

The girl looked at him questioningly, an amused smile on her lips. "I asked
if this seat was taken." She motioned towards the seat beside him.

Hikaru struggled for something to say. He has always been very shy when it
comes to girls, especially pretty ones.  "Ah...ah...yes...ah, I mean... no, it's not," Hikaru managed to
stammer out.

Grinning, she sat on the empty seat and looked at him curiously, before
bursting into laughter.

"What's so funny?"

Barely containing her laughter, she managed to answer before erupting in
another fresh round of giggles, "It's...It's just that it's the first time
...I've seen someone look at me like that!"

Hikaru felt his cheeks burn. 

Stifling her giggles, she looked at him, her amusement showing in her eyes.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to laugh at you. It's just that you looked so
cute awhile ago, with that expression on your face." She gave him another
amused grin.

"Uh...heiki. It's just that..."  He could just feel his cheeks growing hotter by
the second.

Placing her chin above her hands, with her elbows planted on the desk, she
leaned towards him. "It's just what?"

"Ah...iiee, it's nothing." Hikaru could feel his heart pounding in his
chest. He was never this nervous before. Well, at least not in front of a
girl. He managed to catch his hand before it reached his lips, his bad
habit trying to take over again.

She glanced towards the window, then asked, "So, what's interesting about
the outside? You seem to be in a trance a while ago, staring through the
window like that. Are you looking for someone?"

"Ah...no...well, I ...I sometimes enjoy watching people go by. Kinda makes
me feel peaceful...you know, that sort of thing..." Hikaru trailed off.

She gave him a warm smile, as if agreement to what he had just said, and
then, extended her hand. "I'm Rin Hoshino."

Hikaru responded by returning the handshake. "Hikaru Shino. Yoroshiku."

As their conversation continued, Hikaru felt more and more relaxed around
her, as if she were an old friend to him. Although he never knew why, he
had this little inkling at the back of his head that he knew her at some
point in the past. Soon, people started to come into the room, with the
guys either staring at Rin in admiration or glaring at him in jealousy.
Hikaru felt a little uneasy with all the guys staring at them.

At the corner of his eye, he saw Aya enter the room. She was a pretty girl,
with her long, wavy, light-brown hair held by a white
hairband, wearing a short, red dress that fit snugly on her hips. She
glanced at him, a little surprise showing on her face, before heading
towards her seat, followed by her boyfriend, Ryuji Sasahara. Ryuji, on the
other hand, glanced at Rin, admiration showing in his eyes, before sitting
on the empty chair beside Aya.

"Hikaru?" Hikaru gave a start. He realized that his thoughts started drift
towards Aya again. Even after a year, he still had some feelings for her,
even though how little it may seem. "Ah...gomen. I was just thinking."

Rin gave him an amused smile and then leaned forward and whispered to his
ear, "About the girl that just came in?"

Hikaru stared at Rin.  He was about to deny the fact
when the arrival of their professor, a short, dark man with a voice as flat
as a ruler, cut him short.

As Hikaru opened his book, he mentally groaned to himself.  Then he caught Rin looking at him,
amusement showing in her eyes again. Smiling, she opened her own book and
proceeded to the assigned pages of the lecture.



*****


Only three hours have passed since the start of Hikaru's classes, but it
could have been more like a lifetime to him. Finally, his last class
dismissed and he started to gather his things, when Rin tapped him on the
shoulder.

"Neh, Hikaru-kun. How about having lunch together?" For the first time,
Hikaru noticed that she was just as tall as he was, as she
flashed him another of her warm smiles.

"Sure. I'd love to, " Hikaru replied, trying to ignore the looks he had
been receiving from the guys ever since before class, while gathering his
books under his arm.

"Then, let's go." Grabbing his hand, Rin proceeded to lead him out of the
room. Hikaru was trying hard not to blush. They might have just met awhile
ago, but to other people, they could have been a couple already, with Rin
holding his hand like that.

"So, what about that girl awhile ago?" Rin asked, while on the way to the
campus cafeteria.

"Girl? What girl?" Hikaru wanted to avoid talking about the topic. Even
though a year had passed since the incident with Aya, it was like reopening
old wounds to him.

"The girl that you were thinking about, the girl with the red dress and
brown hair." Rin had an amused, yet somewhat mischievous smile on her face.

"Gomen, Rin-san, but I don't think I can talk about that...at least, not
yet."

Rin had a look of understanding on her face. "Gomen ne, Hikaru-kun. I
didn't realize..."

"Iiee, you don't have to apologize. It's just...I'll probably tell you in
due time, when I'm ready."

Rin at first had an unreadable look on her face, then gave him a comforting
smile that seemed to fill the emptiness that had come from thinking about
Aya within him.

Hikaru smiled back. "Arigato, Rin-san."

A few moments of silence passed between them as they continued on their
way. As they entered the cafeteria, Rin asked, "So, you're a junior?"

"Ah," Hikaru replied. "How 'bout you? Are you a new student here?"

"Transfer student," Rin corrected. "I came all the way from England."

"England!? Wow, that's pretty far, but then again, you don't look like
English to me."

"That's because my parents are not English," Rin said, giving him another
amused smile, while sitting on a nearby empty booth. Hikaru followed suit,
taking the empty seat in front of her.

When they were both seated, an odd look suddenly came into Rin's features,
as Hikaru saw her visibly stiffen, staring towards something, or someone
over his shoulder. Grabbing her books, she gave Hikaru an apologetic look.
"Gomen, Hikaru-kun, but I just remembered something I have to do. I'll see
you tomorrow!" With that, she walked hurriedly towards the direction she
had been staring at.

Hikaru's eyes followed Rin as she disappeared among the crowd of students.
 He tried to find out what Rin had been staring
at, but all he saw was throngs of students milling around the campus.
Sighing, he started towards the line of students waiting for their
lunches...

*****

Rin walked hurriedly, almost tripping over a crack on the pavement. Giving
an irritated grunt, she looked around for the one she was following. After
2 long years of searching in vain, she might have finally found a clue to
her goal, and she wouldn't let a small thing as her pride get in the way.

Rounding a corner, she desperately searched for that someone. 
Seeing him, she almost ran to catch up to him. As she neared him however,
he suddenly turned around.

"Why, hello there. You're the new transfer student, right?" A tall, young
man with slick, brushed-back light brown hair and brown eyes, Ryuji
Sasahara was dubbed as one of the best-looking guys at JIT, and also had
been one of the most notorious playboys around, although now it seems that
he finally found his place beside Aya Nakagawa.

Rin, a little surprised, managed to utter a confused "Eh..." before Ryuji
suddenly scooped up her hand and kissed it.

"It is truly a pleasure to meet you. My name is Ryuji Sasahara." Ryuji gave
her one of his "killer" smiles, as he released her hand.

Rin knew of Ryuji's reputation. "Rin Hoshino. Nice to meet you." Rin
returned his smile with a simple one.

"Perhaps you might want to join me for lunch? Then I could give you a tour
of the campus, just to let you familiarize your surroundings." Ryuji still
retained that smile of his.

"Gomen, Sasahara-san, but I just remembered that I really have to do
something. Maybe some other time." With that, Rin turned to go, but Ryuji
lightly held her shoulder.

"Some other time...I'll remember that." Ryuji smiled at her again before
releasing her shoulder, then turned around and walked towards the campus
gates.

Rin stared at his back. He had been very like him. Like someone Rin used to
know in the past. Someone Rin used to like, or maybe even love.

As Rin turned around and walked towards the opposite direction Ryuji had
gone to, she whispered the name of that someone, "......Seifer..."

*****

Hikaru glanced at the open textbook beside him as he took a bite from the
sandwich he was holding. Normally, he would have gotten more for his lunch,
but for some reason, he wasn't really hungry. 

His thoughts were interrupted by a sudden pat at his shoulder. "Yo Hikaru!
Heard you were with a hot girl all morning!" Kenichi had a wide grin on his
face, one that he always wears whenever it concerns his biggest interest:
girls.

"It wasn't exactly all morning," Hikaru replied, as Kenichi took the seat
in front of him. "I just met her in class, and we just talked."

"Talked!? Only talked! Man, if I were you, I could have asked her out
already!" Kenichi had a disgruntled expression on his face.

"Well...actually, we were gonna have lunch together, but something came up,
so she had to go."

"Aw...poor Hikaru, he got dumped even before they had their first date..."
Kenichi gave Hikaru an amused look. "Her name?"

"Rin Hoshino." Hikaru popped the last bite of his sandwich into his mouth
before closing the textbook he was reading.

"And?"

"She's a new transfer student from England, and don't go asking me for her
number. I didn't get it." Hikaru took a sip from the cup of coffee in front
of him.

"Aww..., oh well..." Kenichi at first seem disappointed, but after a shrug,
the wide grin slowly creeping back. "So, what's her score?"

"Hmm? What score?" Then Hikaru remembered that he and Kenichi always had a
kind of "scoreboard" when it comes into rating girls. "Ummm..." Hikaru
thought about it for a second. "I'd probably give her a ten."

"Ten!? She's that gorgeous!? Man, I definitely have to meet her." Then a
very amused expression came into Kenichi's face. "Wait a minute, the only
girls you have rated so far with a ten are Aya and Shinami." Kenichi gave
Hikaru a very mischievous smile.

Hikaru almost choked on the coffee he was drinking. "What do you mean?"

Kenichi clasped his hands together in front of him, blinking his eyes
prettily at Hikaru like a love-struck girl. "Oh, is this the feeling they
call love? My heart is pounding, my mouth is dry, I can't seem to say
anything. Oo, I'm so embarassed!"

Hikaru could literally feel a giant sweatdrop on the back of his head. "I'm
not falling in lo-"

"Hikaru's in love!?" A voice behind Hikaru suddenly interrupted him.
Turning around, he saw Shinami with a lunch tray in hand and a bottle of
water in the other, with an amused smile on her face.

"Mou, Shinami-chan. Not YOU too!" Hikaru mock-glared at her, while she just
answered with a sugary-sweet smile.

Grinning, she sat down with the two of them and turned to Kenichi. "So,
who's the lucky girl?"

"Her name's Rin Hoshino, and from what I hear from Hikaru and the others
out there, she is definitely hot! H-O-T! hot!"

"Rin Hoshino? The new girl?" Shinami looked at Hikaru, taking a sip from
the bottle of water she had bought.

"You know her?" Hikaru looked at Shinami, surprised, drinking from his cup.

"No, but almost all the guys in my class are talking about her. I'm a
little surprised that you've met her, considering that you always freeze
and seem to turn into a tomato in front of a pretty girl." Shinami gave
Hikaru an amused smile, as she took a bite from her sandwich.

"Yeah, like right now," Kenichi added, with Hikaru almost spitting out the
coffee he was drinking, while Shinami was trying hard to contain her
giggling.

 Hikaru thought darkly.

"Well, I guess I'd better leave you two lovebirds now. Besides, I have a
class in..." Kenichi glanced at his watch. "Shimatta! I'm late!" With that,
Kenichi hurried towards his college building, waving goodbye to both of
them, while Shinami erupted in another fresh bout of giggles.

Hikaru grinned at the retreating back of Kenichi as Shinami's laughter died
down. "So, Shinami-chan, how's the play going?" Shinami had been a member
of the Theatre Guild ever since she entered JIT, and she had been given the
lead female role in their latest drama.

"It's doing fine, although I'm afraid going to be postponed again due to
the theatre repairs." Shinami sighed, then leaned forward towards Hikaru.
"By the way, you haven't forgotten your promise, have you?"

"Promise? What promise?" Shinami gave him a dark look. "Jodan, jodan. How
could I forget? I promised to help you with your lines 'til the big day. "

Shinami smiled sweetly. "You'd better."

Hikaru cleared his throat. "By the way, Shinami-chan, how 'bout watching a
movie this afternoon?" Although Hikaru had gone out with her many times in
the past, he still felt a little nervous every time he asked her.

"Sure! It has been a while since we last went out together," She replied,
giving him a warm smile.

"Great! Then I'll wait for you in front of the movie house."

"Okay. 4 o'clock, neh? Well, I'd better go now. I have a Psychology class
in ten minutes." Taking a drink from her bottle, she gathered her things.
"Ja ne, Hikaru-kun!" With a wave and a smile, she walked briskly towards
the cafeteria doors.

Hikaru sighed happily. This may be his chance to finally tell Shinami about
his feelings. Gathering his own things on the table, he walked out of the
cafeteria and towards his dorm, a smile slowly creeping in his features.

*****


Hikaru glanced at his watch, as he leaned against the wall beside the movie
house. Eyes scanning the people passing by the theatre, he waited patiently
for Shinami.  Just when he was about to approach the phone booth near him
to call her, he spotted Shinami walking hurriedly towards him.

"Gomen, Hikaru-kun. I was caught up in some last-minute work for the play.
Did I make you wait too long?" She was wearing a sleeveless, striped green
shirt and tight white jeans that wrapped around her slender legs.

Hikaru stared at her for a split second before answering. "Heiki. I just
arrived a little while ago."  "Well then, let's go inside.
The film's gonna start any minute now."

"Un!" Shinami smiled, as Hikaru led her towards the ticket booth. Entering
the theatre, it didn't take them a long time to find seats, even though the
place was packed with people. The movie started as soon as they sat down.
The movie was a love story about a guy who fell in love with his brother's
fiancee. Although Hikaru wasn't much into drama, he was fascinated by the
film's story line, probably due to the fact that he had a lot in common
with the movie's main character, but his mind was filled with other
thoughts.

With a glance towards his side, Hikaru saw Shinami staring at the movie
screen, too entranced by the movie to notice him. With that, he began to
wonder.  He suddenly felt a pain in his
chest, as he remembered a time like this in the past. 

Making a deep sigh, he started to reach towards her hand, but pulled back
quickly as she finally noticed him staring at her. "What's wrong,
Hikaru-kun?"

"Ah...eh...iiee. Nandemo..." Hikaru could feel his cheeks burning. At that
moment, he felt that he could just melt to the floor in embarrassment,
although Shinami didn't seem to notice due to the darkness of the theatre.
Giving him a puzzled look that melted into a small smile, she turned her
attention back to the film.

Hikaru leaned back on his seat.  Making a
disgruntled sigh, he shifted his attention once more to the film,
momentarily putting what he was about to do out of his mind.

*****


Evening came as Hikaru and Shinami strolled casually in the park after
having a hearty dinner at one of the nearby restaurants. The park grounds,
usually filled with playful children and dating couples, was now empty, as
Hikaru and Shinami sat on one of the benches, quietly enjoying the peace
and serenity of their surroundings.

Hikaru gave a small, contented sigh. He enjoyed moments like this, and he
knew Shinami enjoyed them as well, as he made a glance towards her, seeing
a peaceful expression on her face.

 Bracing himself, he forced out the words,
"Uh...Shinami-chan...Ano sa..."

"Hm?" Shinami turned to look at him questioningly, the light of the park
lamps reflecting on her dark eyes and her shiny, dark, flowing hair, making
her seem like an angel from the heavens.

"I...uh..." For some reason, his tongue seemed to be frozen as he stared at
Shinami.

"Neh, honti ni daijobu? You've been kinda listless tonight. Is something
bothering you?" Shinami's eyes had a look of concern, as she brushed a
stray lock of black hair from her face.

"Ah...iiee, it's nothing. Nothing really." For a moment, Hikaru panicked,
then regained his composure.

Shinami had first a dubious look on her face, but was replaced by a warm
smile, as she leaned back on the bench, her gaze turning back to the
peaceful scene in front of them.

"It's really peaceful here tonight, neh, Shinami-chan?"

"Eh...it's rare to find instances like this here in Juuban nowadays..."
Shinami gave a small, peaceful sigh.

 "Ano sa...Shinami-chan...do you still remember
that rumor a couple of months ago?"

"Hm? What rumor?"

"The one where they thought that we...um...we were..." Hikaru tried hard
not to let his voice tremble.

"Oh. THAT rumor...don't worry about it. Somebody must have thought we were
having a relationship since we were always together at that time." Shinami
had a small look of amusement on her face. "I thought that rumor already
died out back then, since we both denied it."

"Well, actually...I...uh...kinda didn't tell the whole truth at that
time..."

Shinami turned towards him, a surprised look on her features.
"Hikaru-kun...what do you mean?"

"The truth...the truth is...that I've had feelings for you ever since you
helped me back on my feet after what happened with
Aya...Shinami-chan...I..."  "I...I...I love
you..."

A moment of silence passed between them, as Shinami seemed to let the
meaning of Hikaru's words sink in. 

"I...I don't know what to say..." Shinami seemed to be confused. "I'm
sorry, Hikaru-kun. I don't think I can ever..." Shinami's voice trailed
off.

Hikaru knew what she had meant. That she can never return his love, that
she can never have a place for him in her heart. He felt a new pain inside
him, so new, so intense and yet so similar to the pain he felt a long time
ago, threatening to swallow him, to engulf him in its torturous grip.

Hikaru closed his eyes, trying to ease the pain, trying to forget what she
had just said, as he blinked back tears that threatened to flow. He
realized that no matter how he had tried...no matter what he did...he would
always be alone...

"Neh...Hikaru-kun? Are you alright?"

Hikaru finally opened his eyes. "Ah...eh...I'm alright...it's kinda getting
late now. Saa, kai ruu masho..."

Shinami gave him a weak smile, as she slowly stood up. "Eeh..."

As they walked in silence towards Shinami's house, Hikaru had a blank look
on his face, as he brooded on his thoughts, although Shinami never seemed
to notice since she, too, was occupied by her own.

Hikaru felt a storm of emotions coursing within him. Anger at how things
were, disgust at himself for ever thinking of doing what he just did,
sadness at Shinami's rejection, but most of all, loneliness...Although
Hikaru kind of expected this discouraging response from Shinami, it was
still different experiencing the real thing.

As the duo reached the steps that led to Shinami's home, Hikaru softly
said, "We're still friends...are we?"

Shinami looked at him for a moment and answered, "...Of course...Oyasumi,
Hikaru-kun..." With that, she turned and opened the door, glancing at him
for a short moment before slowly closing it.

Hikaru sighed, as he walked stiffly towards his dorm, his thoughts focused
on Shinami, how beautiful she looked, how her smile always seem to brighten
up his day, how she would never love him...

Hikaru blinked back the new tears that seemed to hover at the edge of his
eyes, as a sudden blast of cold night wind blew past him. Ignoring the
chill, he kicked a nearby cola can on the ground and watched it bounce off
a wall and onto the street, as he continued his way towards his dorm,
silently grieving at his loss...

<...I'll always be alone... >

*****


Shinami slowly brushed her hair, as she silently brooded on her thoughts.
 As soon as
she put down her brush, her door opened, and a middle-aged woman with
shoulder-length black hair the same shade as Shinami's peeked inside. "Neh,
Shinami, are you alright?"

Turning towards the woman, she answered, "I'm alright, Okaasan. What made
you ask?"

"Mesume, you've been very quiet ever since you came home a while ago. You
never acted this way before, ever since childhood. Your father and I are
extremely worried about you." Shinami's mother, Akiko Fujiwara, entered her
room and sat down on the bed of her daughter, worry in her still lovely
face despite her age.

"Iieee, Okaasan. It's nothing. It's just that..." Shinami's voice trailed
off. She didn't exactly know how to explain to her mother what had just
happened.

Her mother seemed to understand despite her inability to express it out.
"Personal problems...neh?"

"Eh..." Shinami's thoughts were a bundle of confusion right now. She really
didn't know what to do. Gathering up her courage, she asked, "Okaasan...how
would you tell a guy that...that it's best that if you two would just be
friends and nothing more?"

"Hmm...that would be hard, Shinami, since no matter what you say, you will
always wind up hurting that guy's feelings...I think it would be best if
you told him early ...then probably give him some time on his own..." Akiko
gave her daughter a comforting smile. "It's Hikaru-kun, isn't it?"

Shinami's eyes widened as she gave her mother a stunned look. "You knew!?"

"Of course I knew. I've noticed since the first time he came here that he's
a little bit timid and listless whenever you're around. Only a man in love
would look like that." Akiko had a look of amusement on her face.

Shinami blushed. "But...but I thought that was because he was really shy
so..."

"Looks like you've still got a lot to learn about boys, mesume..." Akiko
waved her finger at her daughter, before both of them bursting into giggles
like old high school best friends.

"Well, you better get ready for bed. You still have classes tomorrow, neh?"
Akiko strode over to the door.

"Okaasan," Shinami said before her mother left. "Arigato, Okaasan.
Oyasumi."

Akiko smiled warmly at her daughter before closing the door. "Your welcome,
mesume. Oyasumi nasai."

With that, Shinami closed off her night lamp and laid on her bed, sleep
slowly coming to her as she whispered, "Gomen, Hikaru-kun..."

*****

Hikaru opened his eyes. He was standing again in the same field of flowers
that he had dreamt in the past.

 With that, his eyes scanned for the girl with
the blue dress, but was only greeted by the colorful shades of the flowers
on the ground and the petals in the wind. Sighing, he sat down on the
flower bed. 

[I'll be here...] A hauntingly, familiar voice suddenly rang through
Hikaru's mind, as he stood up abruptly. "Who's there?"

[I'll be waiting for you...] Hikaru walked forward, searching for the
source of the voice. Eyes scanning his surroundings, he shouted, "Who are
you? Where are you!?"

[I'll be waiting for you...so...] Hikaru started to run. For some reason,
he knew the source of the voice was the girl in blue.

Just the, a flash of blue caught Hikaru's eye. It was the girl, with her
back turned on him again, the long tail of cloth of her outfit moving in
perfect harmony with the wind, as with her black hair. A pair of white,
ghostly wings suddenly sprang from the embroidered ones on her back,
scattering numerous crystalline feathers in the wind. A single feather,
shining with an unusual white light, floated towards him, as he easily
reached up and caught it.

Staring at the glowing feather on the palm of his hand, Hikaru gasped and
jerked back his head as thousands of visions filled his mind. Flashes of
memory that weren't his own, illusions of events and places foreign to him,
portraits of faces unknown to him, all seeming to tear his very sanity away
from him.

Abruptly, he threw the glowing feather away, gasping, his knees giving way
as he sank to the ground.  Staring at the ground for
a moment, he looked up to see the girl in blue in front of him, still with
her back turned to him, but somehow losing the wings from earlier.

"Who are you? What are you doing to me!?" Hikaru said vehemently, as he
stood up gingerly, reaching out to touch the girl's shoulder. But as soon
as his fingers met with the blue fabric, a blazing, light emerged from
where he touched the girl, covering everything in white...

*****

Hikaru suddenly sat up, gasping. Sweat glistened on his temples as it
flowed down his cheeks and neck, soaking the white shirt he was wearing.

 Throwing the covers off him, he glanced at
Kenichi in the other bed, still asleep in a very awkward position.


Looking at his alarm clock that read 3:00 AM, he stood up and went to the
makeshift kitchen of their dorm room. Pouring himself a glass of water, his
thoughts suddenly reverted back to what had just happened between him and
Shinami, as he tried to stop the tears that threatened to emerge once
again.

 Taking a drink from the glass, he sighed sadly. Somehow,
things never really worked out for him in things like this. Leaving the
half-full glass on his desk, he climbed back to his bed,
and soon fell into a light, dreamless sleep.

*****


Hikaru slowly climbed the stairs up in his college building, a depressed
look on his face. As he had expected, Shinami had deliberately avoided him
all morning, talking with a pair of girls Hikaru knew as her acquaintances.

 he thought sadly, as he
remembered a time like this a couple of years ago, only now, he had no one
to lean on, no one to help him face the pain. Giving a deep, sad sigh, he
entered his classroom...

...Only to see a familiar figure sitting on the seat beside his.

"Ohayou, Hikaru-kun!" Rin's smile was exceptionally bright this morning.
Although normally it would've made him smile also, it failed to lift up his
heavy mood.

"Hikaru-kun? Doshitano? You look depressed, " Rin asked as soon as Hikaru
was seated on his usual seat.

For a moment, Hikaru was tempted to tell her. Tell her about Shinami, about
his pain and loneliness... "Iiee, it's nothing, Rin-san..."

Rin gave him a look of concern. "I know something's bothering you..." She
put her hand on his shoulder. "Look, Hikaru-kun, whatever it is, I think
it's best if you-"

"Gomen, Rin-san...but I would like to be alone for now." Hikaru looked
away, a sad expression on his face.

Rin had an unreadable expression on her face. " ...Sou ka? Gomen ne,
Hikaru-kun."

Rin never spoke to him again for the rest of morning, which made Hikaru a
little bit guilty of what he had said to her. Just as his last class for
the morning ended, Hikaru turned towards the seat beside him. " Anou,
Rin-san, I'm sorry about what I said earlier... "

Rin merely gave him a small smile. " Don't worry about it. I'm the one who
should be apologizing to you, being so insistent and forward like that. But
I'm sure things'll work out fine, whatever it is that's bothering you. "

"I hope so," Hikaru answered with a sad look.

"Now, to make up for yesterday..." Rin grabbed his hand and proceeded to
drag him out of the room, into the hallway, and through the main exit of
the building

"Cho...chotto matte...Rin-san, where are you taking me?" Hikaru sputtered
out.

Rin gave him a playful look. " *We* are eating outside, and *I'm* treating.
"

" De...de mo..." Hikaru tried to object, but nothing seemed to change the
strong-willed girl's mind about making up for their lunch yesterday. After
making their way out of the campus, Rin stopped in front of a small, rustic
café with am unusually large sign that said, "ABCB Café".

" Irrashai. " As they entered the café, a tall, pretty girl with long, blue
hair greeted them and motioned towards the last empty table near the far
end of the café.

" I never thought this place was so popular." Hikaru said as soon as they
were seated.

Rin gazed at the other people in the café. " I've been to this place with a
friend once, only that it was never this packed. "

< Boyfriend, probably. > Hikaru thought glumly, idly drumming his fingers
against the table.

Rin leaned forward towards Hikaru, then suddenly asked. " So, who's the
girl? "

" Wha...what!? How did you..." Hikaru stammered, genuinely surprised. <
Does she know...!? >

Rin laughed. " I was just joking. " Then her expression suddenly turned
serious. " Wait a minute. You mean the reason you were so depressed this
morning was because of a girl? "

Hikaru looked away, a sad expression on face. " Shinami-chan isn't just a
girl... "

He sighed, then gave Rin a serious look. " Back then, I was still in love
with this certain girl, a high school friend of mine. Her name's Aya... "

" Aya? You mean *the* Aya Nakagawa? "

Hikaru nodded, before continuing. " Aah. We were still college freshmen
back then. She was my first love...Although we were kinda close in the
past, when I finally told her about my feelings, she became...distant and
cold....It was like every time she sees me, all her warmth and friendship
from the past seemed to be replaced by a mask of icy aloofness, as if she
never knew me at all... "

" I never talked to her again. I know that it isn't the best thing to do,
but every time I see her, the pain and loneliness would always be there...
" Hikaru closed his eyes, still feeling the remnants of his grief even
after the years.

" This was the time when I met Shinami. She was my classmate in a Sociology
class during my freshman year. At that time, I was really lonely and
desperately wanted someone to talk to, somebody who would help me face the
pain. Shinami was the one who did that. She would always seem to brighten
up my day by just being there...and..."

Hikaru gave a deep sigh. " Perhaps that is why I easily fell in love with
her... or...

...perhaps she reminded me too much of Aya when we were still in high
school... "

A moment of silence passed between them as Hikaru looked at Rin sadly. "
I'm sorry. I shouldn't be dumping my problems on you... "

Rin leaned closer to him, her eyes reflecting a deep sadness within them. "
No, it's okay. I know it's really hard to get by without someone to talk
to. Don't worry. I'm here to listen. "

" Arigato, Rin-san. " Hikaru gave Rin a small smile, before continuing, "
Yesterday, I told Shinami about my feelings... she... "

" ...this morning when I tried to talk to her, she avoided me like a plague
or something...I knew then...that the same thing's happening all over
again... " Hikaru looked away, unable to continue.

Then he felt something warm and soft touch his hand. Turning back to Rin,
he saw that she had placed her hand on his, a sad expression on her face.

" Rin-san?"

Rin sighed. " I guess...we are both the same... "

" The same? " Hikaru had a little look of surprise on his face.

" Two years ago, I met this guy named Squall. Although he was good looking,
he had an antisocial personality and was very direct and rude. Back then, I
was in love with this other guy, but he had an accident and we all thought
that he was dead... "

" But I didn't really grieve much for him. I guess I wasn't in love with
him, maybe it was only infatuation, but still... "

" Anyway, Squall was the one who helped me back to my feet. By just being
there whenever I need him, by just being his very self, he made me feel
like I can do anything, like I can take on the world..."

" He also started to change. He was no longer as rude nor tactless as
before. Then we both realized we were in love with each other... "

" But we had an accident. He...he almost died saving me. " Rin closed her
eyes, a few tears sliding down her cheek.

" When I recovered after the accident, I heard that he had lost his
memories and disappeared, and right now, I'm still searching for him. " Rin
brushed the tears from her cheek." I'm sorry, I must look like an idiot,
crying like this. "

" Iiieee, it's okay, " Hikaru told her. " We *are* the same...still
searching for the right one in our life...although you have already met
yours, while I... "

" Don't worry, Hikaru-kun. I'm sure the right girl's just around the
corner...You just have to look a little bit further, " Rin said, a peaceful
yet sad expression slowly creeping into her features.

All further conversation about their sad past was halted by the arrival of
their food. Even as they ate, they still continued to talk, although this
time, about less depressing matters. By the time they finished their meal,
they were again both in good spirits.

" Now, I'd better go. I still have some researching to do, " Rin told
Hikaru as soon as they left the café.

" Wait a minute, Rin-san. I..."

Rin stopped in her tracks. " Hm? "

" I wanted to ask why you told me those things...I mean, we had just met
yesterday..."

Rin gave him a mock-frown. " You also told me about yours..."

Hikaru looked away, a little embarrassed. " Ah...ah...sou...but..."

Rin gave him a secretive smile. " You really want to know? "

Hikaru looked at Rin just in time to see a very amused expression on her
face.

" Perhaps, it's because you remind me too much of Squall, with that mark
between your eyes. Ja ne. "

Hikaru stared at Rin, dumbfounded, as she walked away. He didn't know
whether to feel flattered or confused, touching the birthmark between his
eyes.

*****


Hikaru waved goodbye to Rin as she walked towards the gym. After five weeks
of having lunch together everyday, their friendship dramatically rose from
being acquaintances to being close friends.

A hand clasped Hikaru's shoulder. " Yo Hikaru! You didn't tell me you're
dating her. " Turning around, Hikaru stared right into the face of a
mischievously grinning Kenichi.

" I'm not dating her, Kenichi. " Hikaru brushed off Kenichi's hand from his
shoulder. Whenever Hikaru saw Kenichi with that grin on his face, he always
knew what was next. " We're just friends. "

" Yeah, that's always how it was in the beginning. 'Yeah, we're just
friends.' But later on, WHAM! 'Rin, I love you.' 'Hikaru, I love you, too.
' " Then Kenichi held his hands in front of him, closed his eyes and
puckered his lips, as if he were kissing someone in the air in front of
him.

" Knock it off. " Kenichi had no idea how depressing Hikaru's past loves
were.

" You mean to tell me that you have absolutely no interest in her!? "
Kenichi's eyes were wide in disbelief, his face creeping into a shocked,
comical expression.

" It's not that I really have no interest in her...it's just that...I'm not
really ready for a relationship...plus she already has someone in her
life... "

" Really? Aww...that's too bad...Hikaru lost his chance at the pretty
babe... Oh well, Hikaru better luck next time. " With that, Kenichi went on
his way, but not before giving Hikaru a very amused wink.

Hikaru mentally groaned. It was during these times that he just wanted to
kick Kenichi in the spot where it *really* hurts. Well, at least for a guy
anyway.

As he walked back towards his dorm, Hikaru couldn't help thinking about
Kenichi's words.

< Am I really falling for Rin? My heart seems to tumble whenever she's
there...> Hikaru shook his head. < I'm *not* falling for Rin. She already
has Squall...but...why am I so afraid to fall in love again? >

By the time Hikaru reached his empty dorm room, he realized that the reason
was because he was afraid. Afraid that he might feel the pain and
loneliness once more. < I'm not going to fall in love. I'm not going to
ruin my friendship with Rin, > Hikaru mentally told himself as he entered
his room, silently closing the door behind him.

*****


It was dark when Rin left the gray, three-story building where the
detective she had hired worked. As she slowly went on her way home, Rin
quietly brooded on what the wiry old detective had told her.

*****

" I'm sorry, Hoshino-san, " the detective had a sad look on his wrinkled
face. " But so far, no results. I've searched hospitals, hotels, and even
government records. Nothing indicates concrete evidence that someone with a
name of Squall Leonhart nor matching the photo you gave me would have lived
in Japan nor entered it from a foreign country. I am truly sorry. Perhaps
it might help if I consulted with my colleagues in other countries... "

" Iiyo, " Rin interrupted. " Thank you for the offer though.... "

*****

< Squall, where are you? > Looking up to the serene, night sky, she sighed.
< Please, Squall. I...need you. I'm already...so tired of...searching... >

As she reached her home, she climbed up the stairs that lead to her rented
apartment, where she was greeted by a large, brown dog with a white coat of
fur underneath.

" Hello Angelo. " Rin knelt down and shook the dog's ears after setting
down her things in a nearby table. The dog, as if sensing her depressed
mood, gave a small whimper, as it nuzzled her cheek with its nose.

" When, Angelo? When will I find Squall? " Placing her arm around her dog,
Rin let a few tears escape from her eyes. " It's been two years since we
both stepped into this world...we've been to many places...met many
people...did many things...but we still haven't found Squall... Angelo...I
don't know what to do..."

Outside, a shooting star streaked across the night sky, disappearing in the
horizon, as small sobs could be heard from inside the apartment, where a
girl grieved from the absence of someone so dear...




Author's Notes:

Well, that took a lot of effort to write. I've finally finished the first
chapter of Another Life. This story has been inside my head for quite a
long time ever since I finished Final Fantasy VIII Japanese version. For
comments and criticisms, email at heero9@geocities.com., but please take it
in mind that this is my first fanfic ALONE. (The first was Tsuki no Wing,
but I'm with Duo, and the rest, so the writing style will probably better
there than here.)

This fic was inspired by the Final Fantasy VIII game and Rinoa Heartily.

Translation Notes:

Gomen/ Gomen nasai : Sorry/I'm sorry.
Iiyo : rough translation >> combination of "That's enough" and "It's
alright"
Iiieee : rough translation >> combination of "No" and "That's not it"
De mo : But
Irrashai : Welcome
Chotto matte : Wait a minute
Arigato : Thank you
Ohayou : Good morning
Doshitano : What's wrong?
Anou/ Anou sa : a sort of expression. Roughly like, "well..."
Okaasan : Mother
Oyasumi/Oyasumi nasai : Good night
Neh : a sort of expression
Aah/ Un : expression of affirmation
Honti ni daijobu : Are you really all right?
Kairu masho : Let' go home
Jodan : way of saying "It's a joke"
Nandemo/heiki : It's nothing
Mou : sort of expression
Shimatta : Japanese equivalent of "Damnit"

Well, you 'd better want to read the translation notes, since I'll not be
putting them in future chapters. DON'T email me asking for the translation
of a certain Japanese word in my fic. Of course I'll put the translation of
new words used, but...-_- As you can see, being a CS Major makes me so busy
that I can only check my mail 4 or 5 times a week.

Copyright: Final Fantasy VIII and all other logos, descriptions,
trademarks, etc. are properties of Squaresoft. Hikaru Shino and other
things included in this fic that are not theirs are properties of the
author, namely me. If you want to borrow them for some reason, email me
first. I've worked hard to make a good storyline for this, and I wouldn't
appreciate the fact that someone would just steal my creation.

Oops. Forgot to mention the ABCB Cafe is from Kimagure Orange Road and is the property of its creator, so it isn't mine. Just wanted cameo something there. Exepct more cameos from other anime and possibly games, in later chapters.

Wing Heart
Finished, September 15,1999
Edited, December 7,1999

    Source: geocities.com/heero_9