"Park"

By Shaun Blankenship

SCENE: Arnold, Gerald, Sid and Stinky are walking home from playing baseball… plus Park. Who’s Park? If you don’t know, then you aren’t a Hey Arnold fan. Park is a back-up character used from time to time. He’s in maybe four episodes. The only episode that comes to mind at the moment is Cool Party. He hung out with Peapod Kid at Rhonda’s house and eventually left with him to go to Arnold’s party. He has like a mop top hairstyle. Recognize him?

ARNOLD: Aw, man, that was great! Did you see that! I was caught between second and third, and then Eugene dropped the ball and I was able to make it home! Aw, that was a great game!

PARK: Yeah.

ARNOLD: Hey, you talked!

GERALD: Usually you just walk with us until there’s no one left to walk with.

PARK: I talk!

STINKY: Yeah, but you don’t say much.

SID: Most of the time it’s just, "Hi, Arnold."

ARNOLD: Hey, leave him alone! So Park, what are you going to do this afternoon?

PARK: [Gasps.] What time is it?

GERALD: [Is wearing a Wacko Watch.] It’s about 4:58.

PARK: Oh, my gosh! I gotta go! Bye! [Starts running down the street.]

ARNOLD: Wait! [Park is out of view.] What was his problem?

GERALD: I do not know.

SCENE: Park walks inside his home. There’s nothing special about his home, and his parents aren’t there. His rooms are painted with a shade of olive green. His kitchen connects into his living room. His living room has only two pictures hung on the wall: one of Park, one of him and his parents. The only furniture in his living room is a couch right across from the TV and a coffee table in front of the couch. He sits down on the couch, grabs the TV remote from the coffee table, and flips the TV on. He get up from the couch and grabs a video tape from off the top of the VCR that sits on top of the TV (It’s a console). He pushes the tape in and hits record. The TV show starts. What’s the show? A cartoon called "Ross and Co.". We now focus on the TV show:

ROSS: [A high-school kid in blue jeans and a red and white shirt. The sleeves, collar, and area connecting them are read, but the back and front are white. Him and another kid, John, who I’ll leave to your imagination, are sitting at a kitchen table.] How are we going to come up with fifty boxes of chocolate frogs?

JOHN: I know, we can make our own!

ROSS: [Gasps.] How are we supposed to make all these chocolate frogs?

PARK: Where do they come up with this stuff?

SCENE: At lunch, Park sat with Arnold the next day.

ARNOLD: Well, it’s great to see you at the table.

PARK: Yeah. Hey, Gerald, you want my curly fries?

GERALD: How much?

PARK: Fifty-cents.

GERALD: You got yourself a deal! [Park slides Gerald a little cardboard dish with fries in it. He now has no more food in front of him and pulls out a magazine.]

ARNOLD: Hey, what you got there?

PARK: Oh, this magazine I bought. There’s an interview with Frederick Thompson.

ARNOLD: Who’s that?

PARK: [His eyes get wide and his jaws drop.] Who’s Frederick Thompson? He’s the creator of Ross and Co.; one of the greatest cartoons of all time?

GERALD: Ross and Co.?

ARNOLD: You know, that cartoon with the kid in Albany, gets into weird adventures…

GERALD: Oh, I’ve seen that cartoon. [Pausing.] I don’t really like it.

PARK: How can you not like it? It’s perfect! It has everything! Adventure, Mystery, Romance; yet simple enough to relate to! It’s the only reason to watch TV!

ARNOLD: Hey, calm down. You must really like this show.

PARK: It’s more than a show. It’s… it’s… I don’t know. Hold on, I’m gonna go get a thesaurus. [He leaves the table.]

GERALD: No wonder he never speaks much.

ARNOLD: Yeah. So, who’d you choose as your partner for Mr. Simmons’ new assignment?

GERALD: He decided not to let us choose, he’s going to decide.

ARNOLD: When did this happen?

GERALD: When you went to the bathroom.

SCENE: Park is in class. Mr. Simmons is rambling but Park is writing.

SIMMONS: Alright, now for our project, we’re going to make a diorama!

HELGA: Didn’t we just do this a while ago?

SIMMONS: Yes, I know, Helga. We did make these not too long ago, but this time we’ll be making dioramas of your imagination! I want you all to make a scene with the diorama at random with each of you contributing to a part of it. Then I want all of you to individually write a story based on the new scene created on your special dioramas.

PARK: [Ignoring the teacher just writing. We hear his voice speaking what he’s writing.] Frederick, I have to tell you that I am the biggest fan of your cartoon show. I never miss it and know almost every episode by heart. I’m not some psychotic stalker or nothing, but I just know that I need to meet you. You’re my idle, almost a god. [Thinking.] Well, not a god, but you get the idea. You’re my hero. I found your cartoon at a hard time in my life and it’s made me feel better about myself and being myself. This note is to thank you and tell you how important this show is to me. And maybe see if I could get a thank you at the end of an episode or something. But only if you can, I’m not about to demand it. It’d be nice if you could, or just name a character after me. Sincerely, Park. [Taps his pencil at the side of his desk and starts writing again.] P.S.: Will Gloria ever tell John how much she loves him? I mean, this is just starting to get corny. She should just tell him already with no excuses. [Park takes the note and folds it, he puts it in his pocket.]

SIMMONS: …and Park, your teamed up with Rhonda.

RHONDA: Um, I’m teamed up with who?

PARK: Me, Rhonda. I’m Park. I was at your cool party, remember?

RHONDA: Ohhhhhh, you. Okay.

SIMMONS: Oh, one last pair. Helga, you’re teamed up with Arnold.

HELGA: [Her eyes widened and she falls out of her desk.]

ARNOLD: [Runs over to her desk to help her up.] Helga! Are you alright? Are you hurt?

HELGA: [Gets up and almost knocks Arnold down by pushing him.] Don’t you ever touch me again! [She sits back down. Arnold goes back to his seat. Gerald is sitting across from him.]

GERALD: Man, you’re always getting paired up with Helga. I think Mr. Simmons is trying to tell you something.

ARNOLD: Nah, it’s just coincidence.

GERALD: Arnold! We’ve been over this before! How’s it a coincidence that for maybe all but one school projects, you’ve been teamed up with Helga Pataki? Eventually you’d think that you’d be teamed up with someone else!

ARNOLD: What about when I was teamed up with Rhonda and Nadine?

GERALD: That’s one time out of a hundred! Wake up, man! Wake up.

ARNOLD: Gerald, things happen. Sometimes there are no explanations. Sometimes you have to believe that some things just happen.

GERALD: Arnold!

ARNOLD: I said my peace, Gerald. It’s a coincidence.

GERALD: Fine, live in a fantasy. But I’m tellin’ ya…

SCENE: On the way home, Park is walking alone. He is running down to the mailbox and mailing a letter. He then runs home and jumps on his couch, hits record when "Ross and Co." comes on. After the beginning credits that seem like something out of West Side Story (Familiar?), there’s immediately a commercial break. Park is in his kitchen looking through the cabinet while the commercial is also heard in the kitchen.

TV: Hey, kids! Don’t forget to check out the MDTV party bus riding through your town! We’ll have fun and games, prizes and wacky suprises! And we’re coming to your town! Monday through Thursday, don’t miss live music by hopALONGcassidy! Friday, we’ll have Frederick Thompson, creator of "Ross and Co.", signing autographs and auctioning a signed animation-cell from one of his classic cartoons! [Park was holding a bag of cheese curls that he immediately dropped on the ground on his way back to the living room.] That’s right kids, grab the folks and have some fun downtown all week! Coming to your city this week at the city fair grounds.

PARK: Oh my gosh! Frederick’s coming to town this Friday! I gotta tell some one.

SCENE: Arnold is sitting on his couch reading in his room and his grandpa answers.

GRANDPA: Hey, short man, one of your friends is on the phone. Can’t remember his name… Mark? Art?

ARNOLD: Park?

GRANDPA: Oh, yeah, right outside of the garage. The Packard should be fine, I don’t think anyone is going to actually try to steal that old piece of junk.

ARNOLD: No, is it my friend, Park?

GRANDPA: Maybe. Anyways he’s still on the phone if you want to talk to him.

ARNOLD: [Gets off his couch to answer the phone in the hallway under his room.] Thanks Grandpa. [Picks up the phone.] Hello?

PARK: ARNOLD! ARNOLD! YOU’RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS! YOU’RE NOT… OH MY GOSH! OH… I CAN’T BELIEVE IT! ARNOLD! ISN’T THAT AMAZING?

ARNOLD: [Recouping from Park’s screaming.] Hey, calm down. Isn’t what amazing?

PARK: Hold on. [Panting.] Frederick Thompson is coming to town! Friday, he’s gonna be here! Here, Arnold! Here!

ARNOLD: Well… okay… so he’s going to be here. Good for you, Park.

PARK: Arnold, you don’t understand what this means to me! The creator of…

ARNOLD: I know, we went over all of this at lunch. I’m glad your happy, Park, but I have homework I need to get back to.

PARK: Oh, I’m sorry. I’m just… so exited! I can’t believe it!

ARNOLD: Well, you have a nice day.

PARK: Yeah, same to you. [Hangs up. Arnold just stood there, hung up, and went back to his room.]

GRANDPA: [Still standing in Arnold’s doorway.] So, what’d your little friend want?

ARNOLD: He just wanted to tell me something, nothing important.

GRANDPA: Well, okay. Dinner will be done around seven. Gertie’s making lime covered lamb tonight!

ARNOLD: Grandpa, why do we let Grandma cook? Why can’t we just order pizza or something?

GRANDPA: Are you nuts? Do you know how much it would cost to buy pizza for all of the boarders? Now don’t be silly, be down at seven. I have a new boarder to tend to.

ARNOLD: Okay, Grandpa. [He gets back to his book.]

SCENE: That Friday, there is a carnival going down in the fairgrounds. There’s rides and everything, but Park is standing in line for a stage set on the back of a truck trailer. A desk is set up, and many people are going up to the desk and getting autographs from the man at the table. Park is at the very end of the line and Sid and Stinky walk up to him.

SID: Hey, Park, what’s going on?

PARK: Can’t you see? I’m in line for an autograph.

STINKY: Well, who the heck is up there, the president? I reckon this line’s a mile long!

PARK: Frederick Thompson is up there. [Sid and Stinky stare blankly.]

SID: Okay, then. Well, we’re gonna be over here, having fun. Good luck with your… whoever. [They both walk away.] Boy howdy, what an idiot.

STINKY: Yeah, I reckon that kid’s dumber than a bag of hammers, since hammers don’t have no brain and why in the world would anyone need a bag of hammers? One or two would be enough, but a whole bag…

SID: I get the idea, Stinky. [Park still waits in line. Slowly, little-by-little, the line dwindles down until there’s only four people and Park at the end.]

PARK: I’m almost there! I’m almost there!

FREDERICK: Your welcome. Next. [The four people walk up and Fred quickly signs a glossy picture of himself for them.]

PERSON#4: Oh, thank you! What do you do again?

FREDERICK: Next!

PARK: [Almost frozen in front of Fred.] H-H-Hi.

FREDERICK: Yeah, hi, how ya doin’? Who should I make this autograph out?

PARK: Um, my n-n-name is P-P-P-P-

FREDERICK: Yeah?

PARK: [Gulps.] Park.

FREDERICK: Huh, Park. Is that short for something? Parker?

PARK: [Leans on a metal rail behind him to make sure no one falls off the stage on the truck trailer.] Uh… I don’t know. My parents… [The bar bends and Park gets shoved down. When he falls, his balance swivels and he falls off the railing and to the concrete on his back.] Ow…

FREDERICK: Aw, man! Can we get an ambulance? Hello? [The security guards around Fred (What? Do you think he’d be there unprotected?) call on their 2-way radios and an ambulance comes to pick Park up off the ground and into the ambulance.]

SCENE: Park is in the hospital with his eyes closed. Arnold, Sid and Stinky are there in his room. Park groans and starts to come to.

ARNOLD: Park?

PARK: [His eyes open and he looks around.] Huh? Where am I? Who are you? WHAT’S GOIN’ ON?!

ARNOLD: Relax, Park, it’s me! Arnold! Sid and Stinky told me what happened at the fairgrounds.

STINKY: You sure did take a bad fall there.

SID: Yeah, you were just like… errrrrreewwwww, pwooossshhhh!!!

PARK: What? Where’s Fred?

ARNOLD: Well, he left a business card with the ambulance driver in case your parents want to press charges with the trailer rental company. He also left you your signed picture.

PARK: I didn’t get to tell him how big of a fan I was! I didn’t get to talk to him at all! I didn’t really say anything!

ARNOLD: Calm down. At least you’re all right.

SID: You got your signed picture. Isn’t that enough?

PARK: Enough? [Stands up from hospital bed.] I’ve waited my whole life to meet my idle and when I finally do, I end up in the hospital before I can really talk to him. We need to find him, Arnold! We just have to! [He pounds his left palm with his right fist and quickly screams in pain.] Ow! Maybe I should lie down…

ARNOLD: Park, it’ll be alright. This isn’t the last time you’ll ever see him again. He’ll probably be around again.

PARK: But what if he isn’t! You gotta help me, guys!

SID: Um, Stinky and me have to go now. I got homework to do…

STINKY: Yeah, I got homework too…

SID: We have group homework to do!

STINKY: Wait, we do have group homework do, Sid.

SID: …More reason to leave! Bye! [They run out of the hospital.]

PARK: Arnold, you have to help me find him! I just have to tell him! I may never get a chance like this again!

ARNOLD: But… you’re bedridden.

PARK: I’ll be fine in a half-hour! I need to talk to him. I just have to or I know I’ll regret it.

ARNOLD: But how are we gonna find him?

SCENE: A montage of scenes. Arnold and Park (Park is bandaged up from his fall) are walking downtown. They stop inside of a hotel and talk to the man at the front desk. They are pointed towards the door. They ask strangers if they’ve seen him and show his picture. The strangers simply shrug and walk away. They keep going around to gas stations, the corner store on Cheffington, and many little shops and such in the town. Nobody came up positive. Eventually, at dark, they go back to Arnold’s house.

ARNOLD: I’m sorry, Park. We looked everywhere; we did all we can.

PARK: Yeah, I know, but… it’s just that… there was so much I wanted to tell him.

ARNOLD: You’ll get another chance, Park. This isn’t the end yet.

PARK: Yeah, I know. Well, I have the autograph, that’s something I guess. I sent that letter not to long ago. He might see that. Maybe I’ll get a letter back or something.

ARNOLD: See. It’s not all bad. Cheer up.

PARK: Yeah. I’m still disappointed though. I really wish I could’ve talked to him longer.

ARNOLD: Things’ll work out, you’ll see! You just have to stay optimistic. [They walk inside and Grandpa is walking out of the kitchen.]

GRANDPA: Hey, where ya been, Arnold? You missed a great dinner! Pookie made lemon-liverwurst casserole! Mmmmm. We saved you a plate; it’s in the oven.

ARNOLD: That’s okay, Grandpa, I’m not that hungry. [Starts walking up the stairs to the boarders rooms where his room’s entrance is located.]

GRANDPA: Well, who’s gonna eat this casserole?

OSKAR: [Walking by.] I’ll…

GRANDPA: Don’t even, Oskar. It ain’t happenin’.

OSKAR: Aw, shoot. I was so close. [Arnold is about to walk in his room.]

ARNOLD: Well, you should go home. I bet your parents are worried about you.

PARK: I called them before we left the hospital. They’re both still at work right now.

ARNOLD: I feel sorry for you. They can’t even show up for you in the hospital!

PARK: It’s okay, they gave the insurance information over the phone to the receptionist. They’ll be home around ten.

ARNOLD: I’m sorry. Do you wanna stay the night? Tomorrow’s Saturday, no school.

PARK: No, I’m fine. Thanks for the offer. I should go home and put this autograph somewhere where it won’t get ruined. Even, I gotta get some sleep. Tomorrow I have to put in some work on that project Mr. Simmons assigned. Rhonda must be furious at me. See ya, Arnold.

ARNOLD: See ya. [Park leaves. Grandpa walks up the stairs to where Arnold is.]

GRANDPA: Gee, what was with him?

ARNOLD: Ah, he’s just a little upset. It’s a long story.

GRANDPA: Well, then you better not tell me. There’s only one other thing that’s going with my mind and physical condition as I get older, and it’s my attention span. [Arnold has not gone up in his room yet. While they’re standing there, a boarder comes out of his room and locks the door.]

BOARDER: Hey! [He throws the keys to Grandpa.] Thanks for letting me check out the room for the week. The rent’s on the nightstand. [The boarder leaves with a suitcase in his hands.]

ARNOLD: Hey, Grandpa, who’s that?

GRANDPA: Oh, just some guy who checked in a couple days ago. When will people learn this is a boarding house, not an apartment complex! But he pays good so I let him stay.

ARNOLD: He looks familiar… What’s his name?

GRANDPA: I think he said it was, let me think, hmm… Hoss… Cross…

ARNOLD: Ross?

GRANDPA: You know what, that might be it. Ross Thompson.

ARNOLD: Thompson?

GRANDPA: Yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s what he said his name was. Although his checks beg to differ…

ARNOLD: I gotta go, Grandpa. [Arnold runs down the stairs.]

GRANDPA: Hmm, what’s wrong with him?

SCENE: Outside, the boarder is hailing a taxi. The cab pulls over and he starts to go in. Arnold runs out and knocks on the window before the boarder is even able to tell the cab where to go.

ARNOLD: [Knocking.] Fred! Fred!

FREDERICK: [Rolls down his window.] Yeah, what do you want, kid?

ARNOLD: Look, I have this friend who is a really huge fan of your cartoon. Today you gave him your autograph and he fell off the stage.

FREDERICK: Oh, that kid. Yeah, I remember him. What about him, he’s not gonna try to sue me, is he? Because that was not my fault, I am in no way responsible for the trailer…

ARNOLD: Look, we spent all day trying to find you. He’s kind of feeling down that he didn’t get to talk to you much. It would mean…

FREDERICK: Let me guess, it would mean a lot if I came over there?

ARNOLD: Yeah, exactly.

FREDERICK: Listen, I have a flight to catch. I have things to do when I get back; I can’t take time out to go meet your friend. I’m sorry, kid.

ARNOLD: Please! This would mean a lot to him!

FREDERICK: I don’t have time for this, kid. Now I have to go, my plane leaves in fifteen minutes. I have to fly out to Burbank.

ARNOLD: Come on!

FREDERICK: I’m sorry! Now, please, get away from the car.

ARNOLD: [Looks down and back at Frederick.] Alright, fine. It’s just… it would mean a lot.

FREDERICK: [Sarcastically.] Yeah, and it means a lot to me if I can go down to Burbank so I can go back to my job. See, without my job, I don’t get paid. I can’t just miss my flight! Now go away! [He rolls up his window and the cab drives away.]

ARNOLD: [Staring at the cab as it pulled away.] Well, maybe there’s not always a happy ending. [He walks inside.]

SCENE: At school, Arnold and Gerald are eating lunch.

GERALD: …And then she poured my entire Yahoo soda out the window!

ARNOLD: Wow, you must’ve been pretty mad.

GERALD: Yeah, I was! I paid a dollar for that soda and only had maybe two sips from it! [Park sits down.]

ARNOLD: Hey, Park.

PARK: Mmm. Hey, Arnold.

ARNOLD: Still depressed?

PARK: Just a little. I’m moving on.

GERALD: Could’ve fooled me.

ARNOLD: You gotta get past this, man. I thought we talked about this last night.

PARK: I know what I said. It’s just… you know, hard. I keep thinking what might’ve happened. How happy I would’ve been if I could have told how much of a fan I was.

ARNOLD: Park, let’s say you did get to tell him. Then what? What would you do then? Would your life be any better? Telling him wouldn’t have changed anything for you. You’d still be Park; he still would’ve left, and more than half of the kids in this school wouldn’t know who Fred was. Life would go on if it happened just as it does now since it didn’t happen.

PARK: [Thinking.] Yeah, I guess you’re right. Well, thanks for your advice, Arnold. [Park walks away to his regular table.]

GERALD: Do you think he’s going to be okay?

ARNOLD: Yeah, but not right now. Maybe later.

GERALD: Hmm, well that’s too bad. Anyway, she poured the whole Yahoo soda out of the window…

SCENE: In an animation studio in Burbank at night.

FREDERICK: Hey, did my mail get forwarded here from my house?

PERSON#1: Uh, yeah. It’s on your desk.

FREDERICK: Thanks. [He walks over to a secluded room and finds his desk with a pile of mail on top of it.] Let’s see… bill, bill, solicitation, occupant… [Comes across Park’s letter.] Hmm, must be a fan letter. [Opens and looks over it.]

PERSON#1: [Walks up to Frederick.] Hey, what’s that?

FREDERICK: Just a letter from some kid. Wait a minute… I think this is the kid who fell of the stage thing. Where’s his name… [Skimming the letter.] Park.

PERSON#1: Oh, that kid. What’s the deal, is he trying to sue you or something? Because that was in no way…

FEDERICK: No, it’s just a fan letter.

PERSON#1: Oh, fan mail. The Kleenex of the mail system: use ‘em and then throw ‘em away.

FREDERICK: Yeah, yeah. Now get out of my office, you’re getting’ on my nerves.

PERSON#1: Okay then, Freddie-boy. Just remember, this place closes for holiday in twenty minutes. You might wanna hurry it up. [Person #1 leaves. Fred pulls from out of his desk a pen and some paper and starts to write.]

FREDERICK: [Writing.] Park, Thanks for your letter. I’m sorry what happened back at the fair or whatever, things sometimes happen. Thanks for being such a big fan of the show, and I’m so glad that it could help someone. I’m sorry, but I can’t give you a thank on the show because it’s been cancelled. We only have ten more episodes to play and then it’ll be nothing but reruns, if they even play those. And, unfortunately, all the episodes have already been put together. This isn’t the end of the show, just the start of something else! I have a new cartoon in the works, a plan for a spin-off from "Ross", and a movie that might be in the works. I really wish I could work on this cartoon forever but things happen. It’s out of my hands, so maybe it should happen. Thank you for writing, it means a lot. I really wish there were more I could tell you, but unfortunately there’s not. Sincerely, Frederick Thompson. [Taps his pen in thought and quickly starts writing again.] P.S.: I really wish I could’ve had Gloria tell John how obsessed she is, but there’s no time for it now. I really had higher hopes for the future of this show. Keep this as a lesson; never depend on the future. [He reaches in his desk and gets a large, flat, brown envelope and sticks the letter and something else off his desk in it. He works the latch on the back of the envelope, pulls a sheet of blank stickers out, writes Park’s address on a sticker, and affixes it to the large envelope. He leaves the office.]

FINISH: Park comes home from school and is looking through his mail. He finds the large envelope under an advertisement newspaper. He opens it curiously and finds a letter and an animation cell with a picture of Ross and John sitting at a kitchen table with a box that says "Chocolate Frogs" between them. Park’s jaw drops and he quickly runs through his house. "I gotta call somebody!" Fade to black, roll the credits. It’s somewhat of a happy ending… to bad I never got a reply back. I’m fins ta hurt somethin’…

All rights reserved. ©Shaun Blankenship. Used with permission.