Forever and Always

Disclaimer: Roswell, the characters, and situations are the property of Jason Katims and the WB (I think…UPN might own them now, I’m not really sure, I’m writing this during the ‘Spice up your line-up’ campaign, but either way, I promise I’ll return them. I’m just a dutch aunt who gets to take them to the circus from time to time.) No infringement is intended, and I’m not making any money off of this, so please don’t sue me - I’m a poor university student. All you’ll get are a bunch of debts and a few CDs, but if you are really offended and want to take something, you can have my goldfish.

Summary: Something happens to Isabel and she loses her control.

Author’s Notes: This story has been rattling around in my head for quite some time, and I thought I would go crazy if I didn’t write this. It’s my first attempt at fan fiction, so any feedback would be greatly appreciated – the good, the bad, even the ugly.

Distribution: Ask and ye shall receive. Just let me know where it’s going, please!

In the dream, she is scared and alone. That’s strange, for her at least, because dreams are usually one of the few places she feels completely free.

Suddenly, though, everything changes. She knows someone else is there. She looks around fearfully, not knowing who or what was lurking in the shadows of her mind. She starts to run, desperately seeking something familiar, something normal – something safe.

Branches claw at her arms as she runs through trees. She can hear footsteps pounding behind her, getting closer and closer. She increases her pace, but it is too late. She tries to scream as he grabs her, but she is too out of breath from her mad dash and her terror.

He is bigger and stronger than she is, and can hold her arms down with little effort. Despite her fear, she is vaguely aware that there will be marks left on her skin where he grips her. She struggles and calls out for help, but earns a swift backhand across her face for her efforts. The blow is enough to stun her, and he knew to take advantage of her momentary distraction. She tries to use her powers, but she has waited too long. She has lost her chance. He throws her to the ground and she hits her head. The last thing she sees before she succumbs to the welcoming blackness is his face, grinning over her maliciously.

***

Isabel Evans screamed as she awoke from her dream. Sweat covered her body as she trembled. Dreams were usually her domain, but this one was far too real.

“That’s because it is real,” she whispered softly to herself as the tears began to fall.

***

Max leapt out of bed as he heard his sister’s cry. He raced from his room and ran down the hall to hers, not even bothering to knock as he threw open her door. He didn’t know what to expect when he opened the door, but he certainly didn’t expect to see his sister, curled into a ball and sobbing heartbreakingly.

“Izzy?” he asked cautiously, as he approached her bed. She didn’t even seem aware of his presence. “Iz? Are you okay?”

She turned to face him when he touched her shoulder. Her eyes swam with tears, but she tried to smile, failing dismally. “Yeah,” she answered softly, her voice trembling.

“Why are you crying, then?” he asked, stroking her long blonde hair as he sat on her bed next to her.

“Had a nightmare,” she said, forcing the tears back in, although all she wanted was to sob in her brother’s arms.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Isabel drew her knees up under her chin, making herself as small as possible. “No – I really don’t remember much, except that I was scared,” she lied, refusing to look him in the eye. Max always knew when she was lying, so she usually didn’t bother, but desperate times called for desperate measures. “You can go back to bed. I’m perfectly fine,” she insisted, when he looked doubtful.

“Izzy, you aren’t ‘fine’ – you’re scared half to death. You’re trembling. I thought I’d come in here and find someone coming after you with a butcher’s knife, after the scream I heard.”

“It’s a good thing Mom and Dad aren’t here, then,” she replied with a shaky chuckle. “Really, Max, go back to bed. It’s 3 am, and we’ve got school in the morning.”

“I’d rather stay with you, Iz, if you don’t mind. At least until you fall asleep, like I did when we were little and you were crying for Michael.”

A small smile touched her lips, but only for a fleeting moment. Max had to wonder if he saw it at all. “Okay,” she whispered, lying back against her pillows, holding her old teddy bear in one hand. Even though she was now sixteen, and the bear was raggedy and missing patches of fur in places, it still comforted Isabel as much as the night her father had first given it to her. And she desperately needed every extra ounce of comfort tonight, which was why Barnaby the Bear had left his place of honour on her bookshelf. Max stretched out on the bed beside her, and his fingers reached for hers, intertwining, just as they had all of those years before.

“Sleep well, Izzy,” he whispered.

***

The dream began again, exactly the same as before, but this time, Max woke her up before the man caught her.

“Isabel? I saw part of your dream. I want to know right now what this is all about.” Max’s voice was firm, belying the inner confusion and fear he felt. But he knew enough to know that the fear was not his own, it was Izzy’s, and that she was being haunted by this dream.

Isabel sat up slowly and ran a hand through her hair. “Max, it was just a dream. I must have ate something funny yesterday that disagreed with me.”

“Don’t lie to me Iz. You can tell me. I’ll help if I can.”

Isabel’s nerves were shot, and she couldn’t handle any more of her brother’s sympathy, as well meaning as it might be. Slowly, carefully, she climbed out of bed and stood, looking down at him haughtily in the early morning light. “Max, I am going to tell you for the last time, so pay attention: there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I just had a couple of weird dreams. It happens to everybody. End of story. Now, if you don’t mind, I would like to get ready for school.”

Max stood, too, facing her. He could see the determination on her lovely face. He didn’t buy the Ice Princess routine for a second, but he figured that she would come to him when she was ready. Until then, he would be patient, but he wouldn’t be quiet. If he couldn’t drag the truth out of her, then maybe someone else could. “Whatever you say, Iz.”

Isabel nearly collapsed on her bed with relief when he left. The last thing she wanted was her brother asking too many questions. “I’m just going to have to get past this quickly,” she muttered as she grabbed her robe and headed for the shower.

The robe was still damp from her shower last night, she realized. She tried to push the memory out of her head, but it came flooding back – her date with Alex, the trip home, the shower under the hottest water she could stand. Her skin was red when she finally got out of the water, she recalled, but she wasn’t sure if it was a result of her frantic scrubbing or the heat. ‘What does it matter?’ she thought ruefully.

***

Max watched his sister jump from their jeep and practically run across the campus of West Roswell High. Now he knew something was really wrong – Isabel might like to jog, but she would never ruin her perfect image by appearing to be in a hurry. And she wasn’t dressed like she usually did. Instead of her semi-usual leather pants, she was wearing an old pair of jeans and a sweatshirt he knew she had relegated to a cleaning-out-the-garage-on-a-cold-day-in-hell outfit months before.

“Hey, Maxwell,” Michael said, come from behind him. “What’s up with Izzy?”

“I’m not sure, but she kept having these dreams last night. I saw part of one, but she wouldn’t tell me anything. But something’s wrong, Michael. And we’d better find out what.”

“Well, did anything happen last night? Maybe she had a fight with Alex.”

“If she did, she didn’t tell me, and she usually tells me stuff like that,” Max replied, climbing out of the jeep. “Let’s go find Alex. Maybe he can answer some of my questions.”

***

Isabel was hidden from the world in her small corner of the library. She didn’t want to see or talk to anyone, and hopefully, no one would think to look for her in the stacks. She would have stayed home this morning, but that would have meant another confrontation with Max, and she couldn’t deal with that right now. Instead, she just wanted to get through the day. “Why me?” she whispered miserably as she rubbed her sore arms.

Then she shook her head with determination. Max already suspected something, but she couldn’t tell him the truth. She couldn’t tell anyone, and she couldn’t live with it herself.

“I guess I know what I have to do,” she whispered as a tear trickled down her cheek. “But at least I can give them a few good memories.”

***

“Hey, Alex!” Max called as he spotted his sister’s boyfriend standing with Liz and Maria. “Can we talk to you for a sec?”

“Yeah, sure,” Alex replied, looking at Max and Michael with confusion as the girls leaned up to kiss their respective boyfriends. “Where’s Isabel?”

“Around here somewhere,” Michael said. “Look, did something happen between you two last night? Did you guys have a fight?” Michael was nothing if not direct.

“A fight? No, of course not,” Alex replied, completely confused. “Why?”

“Isabel woke me up last night, screaming. She said she had a nightmare, that she didn’t even remember what it was about, but then she had another one a little while later. I saw part of it, and I’m pretty sure it was the same one, but she refused to tell me what was wrong. I was kinda hoping that you guys had a fight or something simple like that,” Max explained.

“Poor Isabel,” Liz said as she wrapped her arms around Max’s waist. She knew how close they were and how much this must be bothering him.

“She was fine last night,” Alex said. “Maybe I should go and talk to her.”

“Why don’t you tell us exactly what happened last night? Something might have upset her that you didn’t even notice,” Maria suggested.

“Well, I picked her up and we had supper at the Crashdown, then we went to see a movie. After that, we went to the park for a while and watched the stars, and then she went home. It was a great night. The only thing we even vaguely argued about is that I wanted to drive her home, but she said she could walk home easily enough. I told her it wasn’t a good idea to walk alone at night, but she said she was probably the safest girl on the planet, and that I had to go home and study for my Chemistry test, or else we wouldn’t be able to go out this weekend. She was right, so we kissed goodbye, and we both walked home. That was it,” Alex said, shrugging.

“Sounds pretty normal to me, too, but if you want, I’ll try to talk to her before lunch,” Liz offered.

“I’ll talk to her in homeroom, and we can compare notes in history,” Maria suggested. “It’s right before lunch, so we can always just corner her and ask her about it then.”

“Okay,” Max agreed.

“I don’t want her to feel like everyone’s ganging up on her,” Alex protested. “Maybe it was just a dream, and you’re just making a big deal out of nothing. No offence, Max, but it’s been a while since we were last chased by the FBI or Valenti. Maybe you’re just blowing this out of proportion.”

“I hope I am, Alex,” Max sighed, “But I really don’t think that’s the case. Isabel was absolutely terrified when she woke up. I just want to help her, if I can, but I can’t do that unless she tells us what’s wrong.”

***

Isabel’s morning classes flew by in a daze. She took detailed, methodical notes, like she did every day, but she knew that she couldn’t answer a simple question if her life depended on it. She knew it really didn’t matter anyway. Nothing mattered anymore, but she had to keep up appearances for a while, at least. The only thing she was vaguely aware of was that Maria and Liz seemed to be asking her how she was feeling every ten minutes. It didn’t take a genius to realize that her brother had told them about the dreams she had last night.

She made a conscious effort to try to shake off her stupor for her history class, the only class the six of them all shared. “If I’m lucky, Michael will be skipping today and the teacher will assign reading or something,” she muttered as she entered the classroom.

No such luck. Her brothers, her boyfriend, and her friends were already in their usual places. Isabel knew she had to put in the performance of her life, or Max would never drop this whole dream thing and she would never be able to do what she had to do. Smiling brightly, she flounced across the room to her seat, knowing that five pairs of eyes watched her every move. Deliberately, she leaned over to peck Alex lightly on the cheek before sitting down. “Hi, honey!” she exclaimed brightly. “Sorry I missed you this morning, but I had to return an overdue library book. But I’d like to make it up to you…”

Alex grinned at her. “What did you have in mind?”

Isabel took a deep breath, determined to give him one last night before his world came crashing down around him. She needed it, too. It would give her the courage to do the only thing she could do. Alex deserved one last night, at least.

“Well, I don’t remember if I mentioned it last night, but my Mom and Dad are visiting my Aunt Mary in Chicago until next Sunday – she just got a huge promotion at work, and there’s this big awards ceremony, so they decided to go see her and Uncle Josh. So, Max and I are on out own for the next nine days. I was thinking it might be nice for us to have a quiet evening alone together. I’ll even cook you dinner,” she promised, beaming at him. She swivelled in her seat. “You don’t mind if I have the house to myself tonight, do you, Max?”

Max didn’t buy her act for a minute, but was saved from answering when the teacher called the class to attention.

Sixty minutes later when the bell rang, signalling the end of class, Isabel was so sick of smiling sweetly that she was ready to scream. But she was well aware that if she gave into temptation and disappeared at lunch, she would never hear the end of it from her brother. Besides, she wanted to spend every last second possible with the people she loved.

She gathered her books and stood, intertwining her fingers with Alex’s, and smiled at Max as they headed towards their lockers. “Do you mind if I take the jeep after school today? I want to pick up some groceries and the dry-cleaning. I have absolutely no clean clothes! I mean, look at me! This was, like, the only decent clothing I had left in my room. Mom dropped everything off two days ago, and she said she would pick it up before they left yesterday, but I guess she forgot. And did you look in the fridge this morning? We have, literally, half a carton of milk that I think went bad yesterday, a loaf of bread, and a bottle of Tabasco sauce. I told Mom I would do a major grocery for her.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Max replied, somewhat stunned by this total reversal of mood by his sister.

“Great! I can drop you and Michael off somewhere, if you want,” she offered, slamming her locker closed and taking Alex’s hand again. “Honey, why don’t you come by around six? How does spaghetti sound? I know it’s your favourite.”

“That sounds great, Izzy…” he said as the walked away.

Michael came up behind Max. “Are you buying that?”

“Not for a minute. Why don’t you spend the night at our place? I’ve still got the sleeping bag in my room, and that way, we’ll both be there to work on her if she has those dreams again.”

“Sounds like a plan, Maxwell.”

Max grinned, erasing the lines of worry on his face. “Now, what are we going to do tonight with our ladies? We can’t let Iz have all of the fun!”

***

By the end of school, Isabel was exhausted from trying to act like herself. ‘How ironic is that?’ she thought as she walked to the jeep. ‘Alanis would be jealous.’

Max and Michael were waiting for her. “Can you give us a lift to the Crashdown? I’ve got to work this afternoon, and Max wants to sit at the counter and watch Liz.”

“No problem!” she replied, laughing lightly. “What are you guys doing tonight?”

“After they get off work, we’re going to catch a movie at the Cineplex. We shouldn’t be home until around midnight.”

‘So I’ve got that long,’ she thought, steeling herself for what was to come. “Sounds like fun. Thanks for giving me the house for a couple of hours, Max – I really want to do something special for Alex. He’s been so great through everything, lately. I just want to let him know I appreciate it.”

“No problem, Iz.”

“Do you guys want anything special at the store? Mom left me a bunch of money, so I think I’ll buy a bunch of junk food as well as some real food.”

“I’d suggest stocking up on the Tabasco, Isabel,” Michael suggested from the back seat.

Isabel really grinned for the first time that day. “Don’t tell me you’ve gone through the two cases I gave you with your Christmas present last year, Michael!”

“Well…”

“Don’t worry, I just placed an order on the Tabasco website for six cases. I’ll bring one of them over to the apartment when they come. Seriously, though, any requests?”

“Macaroni and cheese,” Max suggested as he and Michael got out at the café.

“I know your preferences, Max. After living with you for ten years, it would be hard not to. I’ll see you guys later tonight, okay?”

Isabel drove away before they could see the tears running down her cheeks. They would never see her again, she knew, and it was killing her. She wished she could just hold them both in her arms, just for a little while, but she knew that she would never let go again if she did. It would be hard enough to kiss Alex goodbye. She couldn’t stand saying goodbye to Max and Michael, too.

***

Isabel congratulated herself as she carried the last bag of groceries into the kitchen. “I think I actually threw him off,” she muttered as she tossed the bag on the kitchen table. Realizing that it was quite late, though, she began to throw the ingredients for the spaghetti sauce together as she cleaned up the kitchen.

Although most people wouldn’t have guessed, the Elle McPherson of the sophomore class at West Roswell was actually quite a good cook, undoubtedly a result of the hours she had spent with her mother in the kitchen when she was little. She grinned a little, knowing that she was going to shock Alex tonight. He had looked rather alarmed when she had offered to cook this afternoon, but she really didn’t want to act like she usually did…not after last night…and he deserved something special to remember her by.

She shook her head, banishing the thought from her head as she mixed up a batch of her famous brownies. Quickly, she poured the batter into a dish and popped it in the over, setting the timer. “There,” she said, satisfied. “They’ll bake and the sauce will simmer while I get ready and set the table.”

***

As much as she would have preferred to stay in her comfortable old clothes that hid her body, she knew it would set off alarm bells for Alex. She needed time to escape before they realized anything was out of the ordinary. It was bad enough that she had worn those clothes to school. Instead, she changed into a long skirt and a red shirt she knew he loved and pulled her hair back in a simple braid before running downstairs to set the table.

Everything had to be perfect for tonight. Alex deserved some good memories after everything she had put him through in the last year. And especially for all of the hell she was about to put him through.

Isabel checked on their dinner, and then sat down to write the letter. It was the hardest letter she had ever had to write, but it had to be done. There was nothing else left. She had already gathered the things she needed, and there was no more time. She couldn’t put it off any longer.

Forty minutes later, she put down her pen as tears ran down her cheeks and dropped on the page. Taking a deep breath, she folded the letter in half and wrote his name on it. Quickly, she kissed the page and put it in her purse, again contemplating what she was about to do, but she couldn’t see any other choice.

Isabel didn’t know how long she sat at the kitchen table, staring at nothing, but seeing everything. She simply sat there, in the chair she had occupied for the past decade, and remembered. She recalled tearing through this kitchen, Max and Michael on her heals, at the age of nine. The first cake her mother had helped her bake for her father’s birthday when she was seven. The first time she brought Alex home for dinner.

Isabel was shook out of her reverie by the doorbell. Glancing at the clock, she knew it had to be Alex. With a quick wave of her hand, she repaired the damage to her face caused by her tears as she walked to the door.

“Hi honey,” she said cheerfully as she leaned over to kiss him. “Dinner’s just about ready. Come on in.”

***

“Thanks for a wonderful night, Izzy,” Alex whispered as he kissed her goodnight at her door.

“Thank-you,” she whispered. She knew she should just let him go, but she couldn’t destroy his world without trying to make him understand how much he meant to her. “Alex…I want you to know how much you mean to me – more than you’ll ever know, more than I can ever say.”

He smiled at her, kissing her again. Isabel had been so wonderful tonight – so sweet and attentive. “I love you, too. I’ll see you later, Izzy.”

“Goodbye, Alex,” she said softly as she watched him walk to his car. Slowly, she closed the door. She wanted to collapse, but she had too much to do, and not enough time. “I’ve never had enough time,” she said vehemently as she went to her room to get everything she needed. The time had come, and there was nothing to do but accept it.

She took the letter she had written earlier out of her purse and laid it on her brother’s pillow. It was only ten o’clock, and she knew he wasn’t due home for another two hours, at least. By the time he found it, it would be all over. Tears trickled down her cheeks as she walked back to her room for a final look around before she grabbed her bag. It was time.

***

Max and Liz were laughing at the way Maria and Michael were bickering as they let pulled up to the Evans’ house ten minutes later. They had opted against seeing the movie as they had planned, and instead thought they would just watch TV. Max had almost been able to shake the nagging feelings of worry for his sister that had been plaguing him all day, but something told him that he should go home.

“Hey, there’s Alex,” Liz said as they hopped out of Maria’s car.

“What happened, Alex? Isabel kick you out?” Maria called.

“Alex. Where’s Iz?” Max’s earlier worries came back suddenly.

“I’m not really sure. I got about halfway home when I realized I left my wallet here, but by the time I turned around and got back here, Isabel was gone.”

Max couldn’t help but see his worry mirrored on Alex and Michael’s faces. “Well, the jeep’s gone, so I guess she went out. Maybe she left a note,” he said, opening the door. “Isabel? Are you home?” he called.

The others followed him inside. He could hear Maria asking Alex if Isabel had seemed okay during their date as he and Michael charged upstairs. He glanced in her bedroom, and seeing it dark, he was about to continue down the hall to his room when he heard Michael’s shout.

Michael hadn’t bothered to even glance at Isabel’s room and had instead brushed past Max and continued on to his room. He knew that if Isabel was going to leave Max a note that was where she would put it. As he suspected, he saw a folded piece of white paper on Max’s pillow, and he called out to him.

Max spotted the note as he entered the room. Quickly, he scanned it as he heard the others file into his room and couldn’t mask the gasp of shock.

“Max, what is it?” Liz asked urgently.

“It’s from Isabel.” Max didn’t recognize his own voice. He felt detached, like he wasn’t in his own body anymore and was instead watching the scene. Like this was happening to someone else.

“Read it to us, Maxwell,” Michael urged, instinctively knowing that something was wrong, and that time was of the essence.

Max’s voice wavered and his hands shook slightly as he held the sheet of paper. He took a deep breath and began to read.

“Dear Max:

“By now, if you’re reading this, you know I’m gone. I know this is going to be hard for you to understand – for everyone to understand –but I have to go. There’s something broken in me that no one can fix…not even you, my wonderful brother. I can’t live with myself anymore. You were right. Something did happen to me last night. A man grabbed me in the park. He hit me and he hurt me. Then he raped me.

“I was going to write an individual letter to everyone, but I find I don’t have the time. I never had enough time. So please share this with all of them. They deserve to know why I’ve left.

“Max - I love you so much. You are so much more than just my brother. You are my friend, my comforter, my rock. There is nothing you could have done to stop this. You’ve always protected me, from the very beginning, and this is something you had no control over. Neither did I. I know you Max, and I know you’ll blame yourself. Don’t. It’s not your fault. It’s mine. Remember that I love you, and think about me every once in a while with a smile. Don’t be sad.

“Tell Momma and Daddy how much I love them. They are everything to me. Take care of them for me, and never let them forget how much they mean to me. Tell them I’m sorry that I couldn’t be the person they wanted me to be. I guess I’m not as strong as they thought I was.

“Hold on tight to Liz. She loves you, Max, and if you’re lucky enough to find the kind of love I think you two have, never let it go, no matter what. I wish I could be there for your wedding. I wish I could hold my niece or nephew someday.

“The love you have for Liz is what I feel for Alex. I never told him…and I think that’s what I regret the most. Take care of him for me, Max. He’s going to hate me for this, but I couldn’t go to him as ‘used goods.’ I was a virgin, and I always thought he would be the one…I always thought we would end up together, forever and always. I’ve robbed him of the happy ending I wanted with him, I know. I’ve trampled on his heart. It’s going to hurt him so much that he might never be the same again. That’s what I’m most afraid of, and that’s why I tried to give him one last night to remember me by. Maybe someday he’ll stop hating me enough to forgive me. Tell him I love him.

“I’m depending on you, Max, to take care of Michael for me. I know I’m leaving him in Maria’s hands, and that she’ll love him and watch out for him now that I can’t. I know that they have the same kind of lasting love that you and Liz have – they just don’t know it yet. But they will, someday. I wish I could be there to see it. I wish I could be there to see everything.

“He’ll be furious at me, too, but I know Michael well enough to know that he won’t ever forgive me for what I’m going to do. He’ll yell at the fates and throw things and hate me. I wish it could be different, but I can’t live with the pain. I’m so scared…I wish I was nine years old again. Back then, you and Michael could make everything better. You can’t fix this for me. Only I can do that, but I’m not strong enough to try. Please tell him that I love him, too. Maybe one day, he’ll be able to accept it. Maybe one day, he’ll understand.

“I wish I didn’t have to go. I wish someone could wave a magic wand and make it all better again, but I’m too old to believe in magic.

“When you think of me, remember that I love you. Even though I won’t be here, I will always be with you all in spirit forever, and I will always love you. It’s just the time for me to go. I’m sorry that I’m not strong enough to go on. Don’t blame yourself, Max. It’s not anyone’s fault except mine.

“I’ll love you all forever and always.

“Isabel.”

“Max! We’ve got to find her!” Alex cried desperately, shaking him out of his stupor. “There’s still time! I only left her twenty minutes ago!”

“She’s not here. So where did she go?” Maria cried as they ran out to the car.

“The reservoir,” Michael said with certainty as he climbed in the driver’s seat of the Jetta. Wordlessly, Maria got in next to him and handed him the keys.

Michael tore out of the Evans’ driveway, knowing the others were following in Alex’s car. “It can’t be too late,” he whispered, driving as fast as he dared.

“It won’t be,” Maria swore. “We’ll get there in time.”

***

They made it there in record time, and Michael nearly collapsed with relief when he saw the outline of the jeep reflecting in the car’s headlights. He barely took the time to stop the car before he jumped out, running towards her. He could hear the others behind him, and he prayed desperately that they weren’t too late.

She lay on the ground near the jeep. In one of her hands, she clutched an old stuffed bear Michael had teased her about countless times over the years. In the other, she held photos…pictures of everyone she loved – her parents, Max and Michael, Alex. Next to her was an empty bottle of medication.

“Izzy!” he shouted, dropping to the ground beside her still form. He grasped her shoulders and shook her, trying to make her open her big brown eyes and smile him. Quickly, Michael felt for a pulse and nearly collapsed in relief when he felt one, weak and erratic, but still there, nonetheless. There was still a chance. “Max! She’s got a pulse! You’ve got to heal her!”

Max knelt beside her and laid his hand on her abdomen. He concentrated, trying to rid her body of the drugs she had ingested.

Max fell back against Liz. “I can’t do it myself. I need help!”

“How?” Alex was kneeling beside him, with Isabel’s head cradled in his lap.

“I need more energy. I think if we all join hands, I can draw the energy I need to heal her.”

Quickly, they formed a circle around Isabel’s still form. Max clutched Liz’s hand, and he felt Michael’s hand cover his own. Max took a deep breath and laid his free hand on Isabel again, praying that this would work. He needed her too much for it not to.

Flash* Isabel at six, wandering around the desert, cold and alone.

Flash* Her joy at finding Max, dampened only for her fear for Michael.

Flash* Her parents bringing her home for the first time.

Flash* Crying at night for her missing brother.

Flash* A feeling of completeness when she finds Michael.

Flash* Making snow angels with Max and Michael.

Flash* Watching Liz and Maria with envy in junior high, wishing she could have a close girlfriend.

Flash* Kissing Alex for the first time.

Flash* Stargazing with Alex, her head on his shoulder.

Flash* Her fear and love for Michael when he was sick.

Flash* The rape. Her fear, her desperation. Breaking under the strain.

Suddenly, Max collapsed, knowing he had done all he could.

“Max?” Liz asked fearfully. “Will she be okay?”

“I don’t know,” he said sadly. “It’s up to her now.”

“Izzy? Wake up, sweetie,” Alex whispered, tears falling down his cheeks as he stroked her silky golden hair. “It’s time to wake up. I love you, Izzy. I really need you to wake up. I need you to come back to me.”

Her eyelids fluttered and she groaned softly. “Alex?”

“I’m here, Izzy. You’re going to be okay, sweetie.”

“I’m sorry…I love you…” she whispered.

***

Epilogue – six months later

It took her a long time to get over the rape, and her failed suicide attempt, but Isabel Evans was finally feeling like herself again. There had been a lot of tears and yelling, and they had all been furious at her for trying to run away instead of dealing with her problems, Isabel reflected, but she knew that it was just because she had scared them all so much. Months had gone by before one of them left her alone for more than a few minutes.

They didn’t have to worry she would try it again, Isabel knew. She had scared herself when she attempted to take her own life, but everything had felt like it was spiralling out of control. She was terrified that Alex would hate her, that he would blame her for the rape. Instead, he surprised her. He told her that he loved her that night, and that he would love her and be there for her no matter what happened. And he was. When she was too afraid to sleep, he held her until her demons went away. He kissed her when she wanted to scream at fate for doing this to her. And he stroked her hair while she cried out all of her pain and anguish.

Isabel smiled at her reflection as she applied her make-up. Tonight, she would try to find the words to let him know how much she really loved him, she vowed. It was their first official date since that horrible night so long ago, although they hadn’t really been separated ever since. But Alex had told her that he wanted to take her out to celebrate the return of Isabel Evans – a strong, independent woman who hadn’t had a nightmare in one month. A woman who was no longer afraid to let him in.

***

Alex smiled as he drove to the Evans’ house to pick Isabel up for their date. He loved her, no matter who she was or what she did, and tonight she would know that, too.

It seemed a little silly to be going out on a date with her after everything that had happened over the last few months, he knew. They had grown closer than he ever thought possible. Every night, he would sneak from his bed and climb through her window so he could hold her through the night. They had never gone beyond just sleeping together - he knew she wasn’t ready for anything more – but it didn’t matter to him. All that mattered was that they were together.

***

A few hours later, Isabel sat with Alex, staring up at the sky as he stroked her hair gently. It was something they had done countless times before, but she never tired of stargazing with the man she loved. “I love you,” she whispered, kissing his cheek as she cuddled closer.

“I love you, too, Isabel – more than anything.” Smiling, he knelt before her. “I know we’re young, but I want you to have this,” he whispered, sliding a heart-shaped ruby ring on the ring finger of her left hand. “It’s a promise ring, Izzy. It’s my promise to you that I will love you forever and be with you always.”

“I love it Alex!” she cried, throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him with all of the love she felt. “I’ll never take it off, I swear!”

“Actually, I hope you’ll take it off in a few years,” he said, laughing at the disappointment that clouded her beautiful face. “I hope you’ll let me take it off so I can replace it with an engagement ring, Izzy.” His voice became serious. “Because I’m going to marry you someday, Isabel Evans. I love you.”

“I love you too, Alex Whitman. And I will marry you. All you have to do is ask. You’re already in my heart, and you’ll be there forever and always.”