11.13.97
Harry,
I’m going to write in this a lot when I come here, and leave it
so you can read it when your eyes open. The doctors say you might
have amnesia when you wake up, so I want to be right here to explain everything
when you wake up.
You were so brave when you fought Voldemort. He didn’t know
what hit him! You were fantastic. The world was so hard before
he died, but you did it! You beat the most powerful wizard!
I hope you wake up. Ron is with me. He’s sitting by your bed,
talking to you about what happened. Hermione was here earlier today.
She’s the one that brought you the teddy bear. Ron and I got you
cards, and he brought some of your stuff. The nurse says that when
you feel like walking around, to ask her for your things. I think
her name is Joy. You want to ask for her.
I hope you get up soon. It’s only been two days, and I already
miss you so much! I don’t know what I would do if you stayed like
this for more than a week!
12.31.97/1.1.98
Happy New Year! The clock just turned twelve. Ron and
Hermione are at a party. They invited me, but if you remember, I
promised you last week after we read The Lord Of The Rings that I would
be here for New Year’s Day. I forgot to tell you, but your aunt,
uncle, and cousin came in a little while after we left on the 13th.
Your aunt was a basket case, sobbing about feeling so guilty and whatever.
Dumbledore comes to see you a lot too, and oddly enough, Professor Snape.
He brought you chocolate frogs the other day. Joy has them with the
rest of your things.
The doctors say that they don’t know if you’ll even wake up.
I told them that you’re a fighter; and you are. I know you’ll wake
up. You have a lot of brain activity, the doctors say, and when I
read, you seem to hear it.
2.14.98
Happy Valentine’s Day! My gift is the big bear in the back. You need to wake up; there are stacks of Christmas presents just waiting for you! Even Dobby pitched in! Well, Professor Snape’s peering over my shoulder, so I can’t say half of what I would like to. Well, I will write soon!
6.17.98
Sorry I haven’t written in so long. I came to visit you, as
always, but Percy died. In a terrorist hexing. It was horrible,
and we had to get DNA tests taken to identify his body. I can’t write
much now. His funeral was awful.
10.31.98
Happy Halloween! I brought you a bag of candy so you could
enjoy the spirit.
The doctors are now seriously doubting that you will ever wake up.
But I know you will. Because that’s who you are. You’re a fighter.
A muggle song just came on the radio. It was called Adrian,
and it was by a lady named Jewel. Here, I’ll write down the lyrics
I can remember:
Adrian came home
again last summer
things just haven’t been the same round here
and people thought
and people stare
oh, Adrian, come out and play
an unfortunate accident in a canoe
doctor said, “I'm sorry, not much I can do”
and the air was so still
and his eyes, they did not blink
oh, Adrian, come out and play
That’s about the gist of it. It goes on, and it reminds me
of you. But you’ll make it, won’t you? Yeah, you will.
You’re The Boy Who Lived, aren’t you?
4/12/99
I’m sorry about the blood stains on the page. I would tell
you all about them, but it wouldn’t do any good. No one understands
how much it means to me, to have this kind of power. It’s like ruling
the world. But, if I ruled the world, you wouldn’t be here.
So I guess it doesn’t really work.
You could never know how much I miss you. Every day I think
of you. I wish I could just see you smile one more time, or see your
green eyes open just for me. There’s a hole in my heart that can
only be filled by you, and it’s getting bigger every day. They say
that even if you do wake up, you will be the fifteen year old you were.
That’s all right, because then we’ll be the same age!
1/1/2000
Hi! I wanted to be here for you in case the y2k thing really did happen. Well, I don’t think I’m depressed anymore. I’m going out with Neville. He’s sweet, and loyal... but he’s not you. You’re the only one I’ll really ever going to love. But until you wake up, he’ll do.
12/24/2000
Merry Christmas! Ron and Hermione are getting married in the spring. They wanted to wait until you woke up to do it, but the doctors say you won’t wake up. You have to wake up. I’m waiting for you. You don’t understand, I can’t live without you, even if only to see you from across the table in the Great Hall, or on a street somewhere. That would be enough. Just so I could keep my sanity. It’s slipping. I’m slipping. You cannot be Adrian, you have to wake up. This is so hard without you, every breath hurts with the pain you went through on that night, and the thought of losing you. If you die, I will die. A large part of me is already gone from that night. Please don’t take the rest. I need you.
He flipped through some short entries, and stopped when he saw another
page that had more than doodles.
5.3.2002
Sorry I haven’t written in so long. It has been hard finding
excuses to see you, because they don’t let anyone but family in anymore.
Hermione and Ron had their first baby about a month ago. It
has orange hair, and a really big mouth. They named him Harry, for
you. He’s so beautiful. You had better wake up soon.
Neville proposed to me the other day, and I don’t know what to do.
I know that you were never mine, but I can’t say yes until I know your
answer.
Your scar is fading a bit. It’s strange, I thought it would
always be there. I’d better go, someone is... Oh my God, Malfoy is
here!!!
Hermione...Ron.... memories of them flooded back into his mind... He
let the tears fall down the face that felt so different to him than the
one he knew, so long ago...
He picked up a small mirror and looked into it. Sloppy, yet neatly
cut, hair, green eyes, and a lightning bolt scar looked back at him.
He shook his head. The next page was deeply stained with blood,
but the ink was still visible.
5.6.2008
The nurse said that quite a few pages got ripped out of here when
it dropped off the nightstand.
I can’t stand this life. I am so alone, so utterly alone.
I turned Neville away. He won’t even talk to me anymore. I’ve
taken to cutting my wrists again. But this time, I will die by your
side. Like Romeo and Juliet. The hole in my heart is too big
for me to breathe. Your absence is suffocating me, ripping me apart.
I might as well let them pull the plug, to put you out of misery.
I thought you could hear me. Are you shutting me out? Or are
you too far gone to hear me any more? So many people are dying, but
all I do is sit here and wait. Wait for you to open your eyes.
I can’t anymore. This is killing me. My life is so worthless,
I can’t go on. You might feel the same, when you wake up. Then
you’ll realize.... that I’ll always be waiting for you. Just waiting
for your eyes to open.
--Oh Adrian, come out and play....
He remembered this girl. The one that came to him, his guardian
angel, when all was cold. And he came too late. His angel had
flown. He turned the page, and a small newspaper clipping fell out.
He picked it up from his bed, and read : Obituary. Genevieve Rose
Weasley. Sister to many, daughter to all. She will be greatly
missed. We love you, angel.