Randomness in Flagard part 12, by Herofox (A pissed off Bentram is in the office, wearing only his boxer shorts, talking to Synbios.) Bentram: It might just interest you to know, that I was robbed, on the road to Malorie, last night. Synbios: It wasn't by chance, this famous highwayman; 'The Black Trenchcoat', was it? Bentram: The very same. Now Synbios, since it's not that far out of your reach, I'd like you to put a stop to this villain. It's bad enough he stole my best robe, but he even made me sing, 'I'm a little teapot'! Synbios: Where exactly did this happen, did you say? Bentram: On the road to Malorie. Synbios: Would that be outside Malorie, or outside Aspia? Bentram: About halfway between Malorie and Aspia. Synbios: ^_^ In that case, we've nothing to worry about! Bentram: -_-# You may have nothing to worry about, for you have not been travelling all night, with your bare buttocks on cold leather... Synbios: No your highness, I mean, that I had Dantares patrolling that stretch of road. And if the Trenchcoat was around, he'll have had him! You can be sure of that! (From the Window, they could see Dantares and Justin, pulling a carriage through the town.) Synbios: Well, how'd it go? Did you run into the Trenchcoat? Dantares: We certainly did! Justin! Show him the prisoner! Justin: Right! *Opens the carriage* (But, much to Bentrams annoyance, some of Synbios' soldiers rolled out, bound & gagged.) Bentram: -\/-# Nothing to worry about eh? (Later, Synbios, along with Medion & Julian, travelled to a notorious inn, located between Aspia, and Malorie.) Synbios: Hello there my good man. Barman: Ain't seen you 'ere before mate. What's ya name? Synbios: 0_0 My name? It's...urrrrr... Medion: Clever Jake. Synbios: Who that? Medion: -_-# YOU Synbios. You are Clever Jake. After gathering information, they sat down, at a table. Of course, Julian was drunk again, so he wasn't of much use.) Synbios: So what did you find out? Julian: DRINK! Medion: Well, apparently, he has a strange birthmark on his...er... Synbios: His what? Medion: *Whispers something to Synbios* Synbios: Well that's not a lot of help. Medion: Why not? Synbios: Well there are plenty of people who keep poultry around here. Medion: I don't mean that kind of...! *Whispers again* Synbios: O_O I've never heard it called THAT before! Julian: ARSE! Medion: So all we have to do is wait until someone heeds the call of nature. Synbios: I don't follow you? Medion: No, but I'll follow HIM. (So Medion follows people to the toilet.) Julian: DRINK! GIRLS! ARSE! FECK! Synbios: -_-# How did Julian become a hero again? (A few minutes, Medion came back, holding a bunch of flowers.) Synbios: Where did you get those from? Medion: -_-; The guy I followed, thought I was a girl... (Back in Flagard, an old man named Unoma, from Julian's forces, was playing a game of Chess with Papetts, Medions twelve-year-old squire.) Masqurin: Whatcha doin'? Unoma: We're playing Chess. A game favoured by really clever people, like me. There's no luck involved in it, and the smartest player is always the winner. Pappets: ^-^ Checkmate! Unoma: 0_0....WHAT THE F***!! (Later, our three heroes where just outside Flagard, about to send a homing pigeon to send a progress report to Bentram.) Julian: To think. That pigeon will be in Aspia this time tomorrow. Medion: Technology certainly is amazing. Synbios: Okay here goes. (He releases the pigeon, but then they get a nasty shock) Synbios: 0_0 DUCK! (He ducks but the other two where a little slow to avoid the falling bird droppings.) Julian: -_- This isn't gonna do my hair any favours... Medion: -_- I just washed mine this morning... ?????: HALT! Three Heroes: O_O; ?????: If you value your lives, don't make a move! (They turn to see a man with a black mask, and trenchcoat sitting atop a black horse, and holding a pistol at them.) ?????: Which one of you's Clever Jake? Synbios & Medion: *Point at each other* That's him! ?????: The one who's looking for the black Trenchcoat? Synbios & Medion: *Point at each other* He is! Black Trenchcoat: Meet me at the Lake of Malorie at midnight. And ware these *Throws the trio some black suits, then gallops away.* Synbios: This could work for our advantage gentlemen. (Meanwhile, Papetts is trying to persuade Hedoba the Shaman to do something with Penko the Penguin) Hedoba: I won't do it! Papetts: C'mon! It's only for one night! I just want to give Bernard a little hope! Hedoba: By turning Penko into a girl?! Papetts: Yeah! He's been having such bad luck with girls lately, maybe a little blind date will help him regain his confidence! Hedoba: I won't do it! Papetts: Aw, c'mon, *makes big puppy dog eyes, that no girl up to the age of 21 can resist* Hedoba: *Love heart* (That's sooooooo cute!) Oh alright... but if I do this, you have to use your awesome powers for me. Papetts: What awesome powers? Hedoba: ^_^ Be a dear, and make me a sandwich? Papetts: ^o^ Deal! Hedoba: *Casts spell* Papetts: o_o *Blush* Hedoba: *Covers his eyes* With some clothes! (Meanwhile, three figures are waiting on horseback, while three other figures are watching them in secret.) Voice 1: Okay, here comes the army. Voice 2: That was smart of you to tell them about our little meeting tonight. Voice 1: Of course. I am after all, the fastest thinking brain in the Republic. (So the trio chuckle silently as the other three are grabbed, beaten up and thrown into the prison carriage.) (Next morning.) Bentram: *in his boxers again* I was robbed again last night! Are you the fellow who caught the Black Trenchcoat and his men? Flag Soldier: Yes sir! Bentram: May I see them? Flag soldier: Yes your Majesty. (So he takes the king to see the trio of bandits. Only to receive a nasty shock.) Synbios Medion & Julian: O.O Bentram: I knew it....I KNEW it! (Later) Bentram: Well in all my years of experience as a tactician, I can honestly say that I've never seen such incompetence! Synbios: Nor I, M'lord, I though that the Trenchcoat would hatch a better method of getting rid of us that THAT. Bentram: I'm taking about YOU! Synbios: ^_^;; oh... Bentram: Remember Synbios, out of all the Republic, YOU are the most capable of bringing this scoundrel to justice. Set an example for your country! Synbios: Yes sir! Next time: The investigation continues, while Bernard gets a little surprise.