Title: HSU:A Matching Set
Author: Kendra
Rating: LBOT (Little bit-o- this)
Archive: fine
Disclaimer: GL of course owns it all, but we do take better care of Obi.
Notes: I borrowed for everyone's posts, many thanks. I just couldn't fit the stapler stealing and scissor running in.lol Trust me, I tried.lol
Timeline: It could be occurring any time during Dor's wedding planning stages.

The sound of power tools, men grunting and groaning, and just annoying noise drifted through the General's office. "What the blazes is going on?" The General asked, pushing his door open and striding into his secretary's office.

Kendra was leaning back in her chair eating popcorn while watching the action going on across the hall. "What?" She asked absently, sending the popcorn she had been tossing in the air to catch, to drop helplessly to the floor.

"What is going on?" The Jedi demanded stopping at the front of Kendra's desk, glancing in her direction and then turning his gaze to the Diva's office across the hall.

"Oh, Emmy got a new desk," the Water Ho explained.

"Desk?"

"Yep, she now has the matching set. A Galactic Domination Desk to go with her Galactic Domination chair," Kendra explained. Slowly, the General sat down on the edge of her desk and blinked blindly while watching the construction crew pull the drywall down to make an entryway big enough to accommodate the new piece of office furniture.

"Love, did they..."

"Tearing the wall down and all to get that behemoth in her office," the Ho explained offering the Jedi popcorn, which he waved off. "They should have the wall back up and brand new in no time. You know, we really should keep this crew on call..."

The General took his glasses off and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Kendra, dare I ask where this desk came from?"

"If I were you, I definitely wouldn't dare," she replied. "But don't worry so much, it's not like Emmy went on another quest for the ultimate desk. All she did was go shopping yesterday."

Even with such assurances from the Water Ho, the General still felt trepidation. "Oh and another thing. Just wait here till the Diva has to leave her office later," Kendra giggled. "There is no way she's going to be able to get out that door, she'll have to climb out the window," she added, earning a curious look from the Jedi.

~~*~~

Dande leaned back in her chair and smiled happily while Cal sat in the chintzed wingback chair before her desk. "Yes...yes...hmmm..." the Wench nodded in agreement.

"So you understand?" Cal asked with a touch of disbelief in his voice as he eyed the counselor with bright eyes.

"Oh, I do understand. I think maybe Dor should figure on ordering more finger foods for the reception, just to be on the safe side," Dande remarked while flipping through 'Unmodern Brides', the special summer edition magazine.

"Huh?" Cal muttered, his hands shaking as he grasped the arms of the chair in a death grip.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?" Dande asked embarassedly. "It's this wedding of Dor's, it' has me a little on edge," she explained, quickly jotting down an urgent wedding note.

Cal leaned slowly towards the desk and whispered. "I think somebody is trying to kill me," he said, glancing about the room nervously.

Dande couldn't help but sigh as she reached into her desk drawer and pulled out a Tupperware container. "Don't be silly. Who would want you killed?"

"I don't know, but I'm sure there's been a contract placed on my life," he insisted, his foot now tapping insistently upon the Oriental rug beneath his feet, his beady little eyes darting about in fear.

"Cal, really, nobody is out to snuff you out,:" the Wench tried to convince. "Cookie?"

It was at that exact moment the sidewall to Dande's office collapsed inward quite suddenly and quite unexpectedly, sending debris and dust to choke the air. Also in that instant, Cal shrieked his girlie shriek and ran screaming from the office. Well, that is after he ran straight into the wall beside the door and nearly knocked himself unconscious. However, after bouncing off the wall, he finally made his exit.

Dande slowly stood from her luxury chair, coughing and sputtering while waving her hand before her face to fan away the dust. "Emmy!"

Emmy leaned her head through the rather noticeable gaping hole and sneezed. "You needed me? Oh man, your hair is a mess," the Diva remarked in shock, noticing the usually perfectly coifed Wench's hair in disarray and powdered white with dust.

"What? My hair?" Dande panicked, patting her dismantled big hairdo.

"Sorry about that, just trying to fit the new desk in my office. Guess it's bigger than I thought," she smiled, lovingly stroking the edge of the desk that now rested firmly in Dande's office.

"You and your office furniture," the Wench griped, grabbing her purse and making a hasty exit to rescue her hair.

"Touchy," the Diva shrugged, going back to supervising the desk delivery.

~~*~~

"Bride-to-be at ten o'clock," Ellie commented before taking a swig of her beer as she sat in a table near the bar.

"Got it," Judy replied, reaching behind her and grabbing a tray, then quickly loading it with Maker's, Mountain Dew, Jolt, and a bottle of No Doze.

"Incoming," Jen added, slumping in her chair, hoping the librarian wouldn't see her and make her work on any more wedding decorations. Her fingers were worn to little nubs as it was; this wasn't what she signed up for when she became a padawan.

"I'm right on it," the bartender nodded, stepping back to the bar, tray held in the extended position for easy access. "Somebody get the door before she goes through it," Judy warned as those few in the bar that early in the day looked at her in confusion.

"What?" Qui-Gon asked, tilting his head just so.

"Listen man, this is not a drill, this is the real time," Judy shot back with the controlled panic of a leader upon a sinking ship. "Force open the damn door or Dor will just go through it. I don't want my pub wrecked by a Wo strung out on caffeine, sugar, and too many bridal magazines! Now move it!"

With that, Qui-Gon waved his hand to open the door just as the harried librarian raced inside. Any speed walker would be proud of the performance and the stamina, let alone the fast, yet steady pace she took upon approaching the bar.

"Sorry, don't have time to chat, gotta lot to do," Dor exclaimed as she snagged the tray of necessities from the barkeep's hands, never loosing her stride as she continued towards the other door to make her exit.

"The..." Judy began to alert, but da Mastah had things under control as he opened the door for the bride-to-be's hasty retreat.

"Close one," Jen sighed in relief as all in the bar noticeably relaxed at averting a mini-crisis.

"JenJen! Library! Now! You have bats to make with Bail!" Dor could be heard shouting to her padawan as the door closed behind her.

"Damn," the padawan snapped.

"Tough break," Ellie grinned, before her pager went off. "Damn, how much Hershey's syrup can those two go through," the Ho griped, reading her text message from the Nurse.

Judy sighed with contentment as Qui-Gon did the same. "It's nice being the Master," the Ho smiled, watching the padawans scurry off.

"Yes, yes it is," da Master agreed.

"Which reminds me, I need to get my padawan in here to cover the bar while I take early inventory with Obi-Wan," Judy remarked, picking up the phone.

~~*~~

"Do you hear anything?" Laure asked Donna as the two sat in the mediator's office drinking tea.

"Now that you mention it, there's this rather annoying tapping sound," Donna commented, listening intently. "If I'm not mistaken it sounds like Morse code."

"Oh," Laure sighed, leaning casually back in her chair. "Do you think I should wear the four inch heels to the wedding or the three?"

"It is Morse code...S-E-N-D-K-E-Y-N-O-W...send key now...who would be asking that?" Donna quizzed as Laure waved her hand dismissively.

"Nobody, it's probably just the water pipes being rigged by the Water Hos. Besides, I'm all out of cuff keys, let the Nurse and Cic try a Houdini and get out of those damned handcuffs themselves. What do I look like, a locksmith? Please, why can't those two tie each other up with silk ropes like the rest of us do," the mediator griped, earning a very wide-eyed glance from the other woman.

"Ah, maybe we should call somebody to help?"

"Help who?" Laure asked.

~~*~~

"What dew we dew now?" Cic questioned, staring at Darry's toes since his wrists were cuffed to her ankles.

"How the fuck should I know...we could always..."

"No, I think I threw my back out," the servant objected.

"Fine, well what about..."

"No!" He nearly shouted in panic as he used the Nurse's foot to begin tapping upon the wall once more.

"Fine then, I'll shop," the Nurse snapped, reaching for the laptop that was resting on the bedside table.

You know the one bad thing about being cuffed together. Okay, besides having your husband accidentally swallow the key. The one bad thing is that where one goes, the other follows, thus the happily married and sexually adventurous pair tumbled off the bed and landed in a heap upon the floor.

But the Nurse is good, she didn't lose but a few moments before powering up the laptop and searching for the latest in fall fashion.

~~*~~

"Come on guys, we've got the big one coming up, practice, practice, practice!" Tara shouted while surveying her fire crew sweeping the fire bay.

"We've done this five times already, it is clean," Tyr growled.

"Oh really, just for that remark, I'll let you clean all the windows in the fire truck," the Ho stated, hands on her hips and watching in satisfaction as the hulking firemen hung his head and grumbled.

Feeling satisfied that her boys were working hard and would be in tip top shape for Dor's wedding, the Ho went to the back of the bay and opened the utility closet to grab the window cleaner and fresh rags.

Right about that time Tanner was mopping the back area and walked into the open door, instantly closing it upon the unsuspecting Ho. "You'd think people wouldn't leave doors wide open around here," Ross snapped, holding his nose where he'd gone face first into the thing.

The siren in the station house began to go off and all the guys did high-fives, chest thumps, and thumbs up...they liked their job. While Boromir went to the 'hot' phone to find out what was now the latest crisis, the rest of the guys cheered happily while getting into their turn out gear and piling into and onto the fire truck.

"Ho stuck in door!" Boromir exclaimed with excitement as he rushed out, waving the note in his hand as he joined the rest of the station in rushing off to the Admin building.

"Hey! Wait for me! I'm the Captain," Tara's muffled shouts could be heard from the locked utility closet. "What about me? I need rescuing too!"

~~*~~

"Don't move, this will make a great shot for tomorrow's Tattler," Julia ordered as she used up at the very least, two rolls of film on the stuck in the doorway Diva.

Emmy kicked her one free clunky footed shoe behind her in the hopes of connecting with the picture taking Ho's shins but being trapped between a desk and the doorway limited one's range of motion. "Don't you do it!"

"Ops, too late," Julia grinned, change lenses. "Would you like to make a comment?"

"Leave me alone!"

"Good one!"

~~*~~

"Kendra, love wh...."

"On your head," the secretary replied automatically.

"No..."

"Look on your desk then," she sighed, leaning further across her own desk to get a better view of the action taking place across the hall.

The General swaggered to his secretary's desk and stopped in his tracks at noticing the entire company of firefighters all gathered around Emmy's doorway looking quite busy. "Love..."

"If your keys aren't under the couch then I don't know where they're at," the Ho snapped at being disturbed.

"No love, what's going on? Is Emmy well?" He asked with concern as he began to take a step to the doorway but Kendra grabbed his sleeve to haul him back so he wouldn't block her view.

"Sit," she ordered as he obeyed and dropped to the corner of her desk. "Emmy's fine, it's just a slight stuckage problem."

"A what?" The Jedi asked in alarm.

"Chair too big. Desk too big. Office too small. Wonderbra wearing day. Diva trying to squish herself through the doorway and not making it. She's stuck," the Water Ho grinned, reaching into the drawer and pulling out a bag of peanut M&M's and munching happily while focusing on the action.

"Maybe I should help," the General offered but didn't move, only accepted a handful of M& M's from his secretary and ate while watching as well.

Kendra squealed as Vas leaned in the doorway and gave her a thumbs up sign while telling her something in Russian. "They're going to use the 'Jaws of Life'!" The Water Ho giggled in delight, watching as Julia was still snapping pictures, but the focus had waned a little to include group shots of the firemen standing proudly about the Diva's backside.

"That doesn't sound very good...really, maybe I should help," he once again remarked, holding his hand out for more M&M's.

~~*~~

Jael strolled the inner walls of her fortress and sighed happily. It was a good night, a good day, nothing odd or out of the ordinary happened. Now if only they could locate another toaster on campus so Max could test out the catapult one more time...