Melanie "If I had to describe Mel, I would say she has one of those laughs..."

Mel pic

Biography

hmmmm... so Melanie...... she's umm... really nice and she laughs a lot...wait, she doesn't like being called nice, she is nice, but that word seems like the quiet little girl that sits in the corner.  She is not the quiet little girl that sits in the corner.  She is in all Kelly's pictures since senior year in high school.  Oh yeah, she's 21 years old.  She also goes to the University of Kansas and is majoring is Social Welfare.  She is the only one with blond hair. This makes her special, but then again we're all special.  Mel likes to pose like Molly Shannon's "I'm Fifty" character.  She does that in a lot of pictures (see below).  Her favorite movie is Glory. She has a giant foil ball.  It rules!!   We have decided to write a lot on Mel's page, because she's special.  And one dark, stormy night, she was driving to our apartment and hydroplaned.  Her car rolled THREE TIMES.  Her arms went flailing, and when the car stopped, she was choking (the car landed on the roof side).  These were her exact thoughts:  Oh no!  Panic panic...What do they tell you to do on TV?  Roll down the window.  Climb out....RUN!!!!!.  So she survived. (By the way this is funny now, because she laughed when she told the story).   And she likes to KICK.  And she likes to  STRETCH.  And she likes to KICK!  She's fifty!!!  One day she's going to live in the ghetto.  She lived in the Saint Louis ghetto this summer working with inner city kids and she loved it. Amy says, "She laughs in the face of adversity".  Okay, so she knows this guy, who is in the mafia in a small town in Indiana.  All of his friends were killed by the mafia and now he goes to KU, as a part of the witness protection program.  But this is clearly not true.  She likes the music by the singer Jude and water balloons.  And she likes throwing them at Allison (the water balloons that is, not Jude).  By the way, our upstairs neighbor is named Jude (not the real Jude...it's just a nickname we gave him cause he looks similar to Jude).  Anyway, this is supposed to be about Mel.  Yes!!!!  HOSER!  We forgot Hoser.  She likes to say Hoser and Hose off, because she loved "Strange Brew".  Is anybody still reading?  Good, we thought so.  You are special.  She can play songs on the guitar.  She writes songs about our cat, and Jude (the singer).  She thinks Jimmy Fallon is funny.  She eats vegetables.  Allison thinks this is strange (the vegetables, not Jimmy Fallon).  Her favorite SNL skits are Harey Carey, the Boston teens and of course "I'm fifty!".  When she gets obsessed with a song, she plays it over and over and over, and she dedicates it to other people in the apartment so that she can play it again, until Kelly is sick of the song.  She is from Pittsburg, PA.  And we forgot to link to Ally's X-files site.  Okay this is officially out of control. So we'd better stop.  You are special!!!

Okay, and now for something completely different....more rambling! Mel is 22 now. She is moving to Philadelphia in July, and Kelly is going to visit her five times a year! All of the above is still completely relavent and important and special, so you should reread it to make sure you got it all. Mel likes Sense and Sensibility, and Made, and especially the guy in Made that brings up the fish. She also likes the infamous Sam with no last name that she was in love with for a brief period of time. We are going to fill up more space. Mel is in love with the word scandalous. She likes Jude again, because she saw him on TV for the first time close up and he was cute. Mel and Kelly found "special" gas in Bethleham, PA! One day we will put up the picture. Mel's favorite drink (although she really doesn't drink, so this is only if she were going to drink) is tequila. She still likes to be in all of Kelly's pictures. She is babysitting Eugene, and her mom doesn't like it because he picks on KiKi. Mel bought DVDs even though she doesn't have a DVD player. Mel and Emily like the line in Bridget Jones' Diary when Darcy says "I like you just the way you are". When Kelly watches the movie with them, they rewind it over and over. Kind of like the song thing. Oooh! Mel got into Penn! She's going to go to an Ivy League school (this is funny! Trust us!). Ohhh! And she was in love (keep in mind we use this term loosely) with a professional type not to be named that had a life partner, and now we are all obsessed with that phrase. But now, it's only "there" in email, not in real life. Mel tried to steal a pear the other night at Emily's house. Mel and Kelly were going to hold it for ransom, but then it slipped out onto the floor and Emily caught them. It would have been fun though. There will undoubtedly be more of this fun and exciting and SPECIAL paragraph later. So, you should come back and check often, for updates on Mel.

Okay, again, although we wrote that last night, it was clearly not long enough. Mel now has a DVD player, and watches Bridget Jones' Diary every day. She says she needs to get more DVDs, so she can watch them every day too. Director's cuts are fun stuff. Mel has to go to Topeka on Wednesday, so that should suck. But, Wednesday night, we are forcing a viewing of the actors commentary version of Made (again, the movie with the guy with the gold fish, among other things). We are only mentioning this, because we can't come up with anything else to tell you about Mel, and this paragraph is entirely too short. Oh, and Mel and Kelly really need to watch Monty Python. We like the part with the legos, the black knight, the rabbit that nibbles your bum, etc. We are talking about Holy Grail, of course. It is superior. Or elitist. Or something like that. But, definately special. Oh, here's something else, Mel had vowed not to watch the Oscars ever again, because a certain person won last year. So, we are frantically looking into screens to allow her to attend our Oscar party without actually "watching" the Oscars. Because otherwise, Kelly might have to shoot a whole roll of film without Mel in it. And that would be a scandalous tragedy. We will most certainly add more to this special section later.