My name is Kim. I am 25 and Canadian. I am a research technologist. My hubby Brian and I were married Jan 1, 1999. Brian is a network adminstrator. We have a precious little girl, Jorah Belle who was born April 7, 2000. We also have two bunnies, Megan and Sadbury, who were very jealous of the new baby but have now gotten used to the idea of having someone else to play with. My hobbies include scrapbooking, cross stitching, and skiing. My husband and I have brown belts in the martial art of Kuk Sool Won. I love bunnies! I collect all sorts of bunnies, from ceramic to teddy bunnies. Jorah loves bunnies too!

High Needs Story

My hubby and I met over the internet in 1996. We were married Jan 1, 1999. We planned to wait to have children for a few years, but I became pregnant in July 99. Once we found out, we were overjoyed with our new little surprise!

The stress started around the first week of pregnancy. I went to the dr July 26 with pregnancy symptoms but the test was negative so she told me I might have a brain tumor and needed to have an MRI (because of elevated hormone levels). I was devastated to say the least. A few weeks later, I took a home pregnancy test, needless to say it was positive so I canceled the MRI. I started bleeding shortly after and ended up being put on bedrest and having ultrasounds and blood test after blood test. I remember wearing long shirts to work to cover my arms even though it was summer. At one point, the new dr thought I had lost the baby. It was an incredibly hard time. By ten weeks, the bleeding had stopped. It returned periodically over the pregnancy but they never found out why. Jorah was a fighter right from the start! Jorah never stopped moving in me, the technician who did our ultrasounds had a hard time, the dr rarely got a good heartbeat count because she would never stay in one place!

I went into labour one week before my due date, it was fast, six hours, Jorah wanted out now! She was born with meconium and the neonatal people had to work on her but she was fine. They said she was about three weeks premature. She refused to latch on to nurse, she became jaundiced and dehydrated. That first week was a nightmare, we couldn't hold her as she had to be under lights, I had to nurse her every hour and pump in between. She would latch on for two minutes and then fall off. I went through five lacatation consultants, as Jorah wasn't gaining weight. Then finally, at her two week check up I started crying my eyes out - Jorah was screaming mad (she hated anybody touchign her, even taking her temp was a battle) and a nurse watched me nurse her. She said it looked like Jorah wasn't able to breath when she nursed, so she helped me find a different way to hold her. After that, Jorah nursed better although she still has to latch on ten times during a feeding.

She started gaining weight at three weeks and that is when the screaming started. She cried uncontrolably all day and all night. She would only sleep on me, she would scream if anybody else held her, she just cried and I cried. I was getting no sleep. My doula helped me start finding foods to cut out of my diet and that began to help. Jorah would get incredibly gassy, so much that her stomach was rock hard, but she would not burp. The gas drops did nothing, I would spend hours a day burping her. By the time I went to bed at night my arms would be numb from patting her back all day. To this day, she will only fall asleep by me patting her, if I stop, she wakes up.

By six weeks, she would only scream from 4 -9pm, but she was still really fussy during the day and would still only sleep in my arms. By two months, I was down to eating chicken breast, steak, plain noodles, corn, carrots, white bread, fortified orange juice, no spices no nothing but this. If I so much as eat one bit of anything else, she screams. To this day, it is the same way!

It would take us three hours to get her to sleep at night, I had to hold her and rock her and walk her and do whatever else. She would wake every 1-2 hours to nurse. Mostly she layed on my chest.

She didn't smile until she was almost three months old but she stood on her own at two months, she is so strong. We struggled for three weeks to get her to take a soother, and it took us two months to get her drinking a bottle! Jorah does not yet have a routine and she hates anything new.

At 13 weeks, I went back to work crying my eyes out. I was getting about 4 hours of sleep a day. Jorah went to daycare and loved it. The constant commotion, the noise and the stimulation amaze her. She finally was happy during the day and my depression grew even deeper as I wondered why I couldn't make her happy at home. At night she still cried and fussed. By four months, she fell asleep earlier but she still would wake every hour or so. Five months same thing. At daycare they rock her to sleep, put her in her crib and she wakes up. We are lucky if she takes a 15min nap there.

At six months, I couldn't handle the sleep deprivation anymore. Her sleep habits were becoming worse. She was waking several times a night to nurse. Ferber wasn't something I wanted to do, because her crying always escalated if she was left for a minute. We decided to start increasing the amount she eats and to let her fall asleep on her own in the evening, rather than trying to get her to sleep. We went from two meals a day to four, making sure all of them had some form of protein (either cereal or meat). The first day we tried this, she slept 6 hours straight! Finally we were getting some sleep!

Our latest struggles have been her food allergies. She screams with gas pain and it has been hard learning what foods to avoid. We are also in the process of changing over to formula as she is starting to wean herself from nursing. I have mixed feelings on this as nursing has been a great source of comfort for both of us, but on the other hand, I need to start eating again as I have been sick for the past three months.

Jorah though, is the greatest thing that ever happened to us. She is so incredibly animated and curious and is constantly questioning the world. She amazes me every day. She is very vocal, loves to jabber, loves peek a boo and loves for me to sing to her. I can't imagine life without her now. She is my precious little angel! I thank God everyday for her. Her smile is so infectious, it melts my heart. I could be crying my eyes out of sheer frustration and she smiles at me and immediately all is better with the world. Her giggle is so cute and she loves to laugh for her Daddy. I love them both so much!

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