-- Right about now one would expect the camera to fade in. Instead, the screen stays pitch black. We can hear rustling in the background, but not much else. Suddenly we hear noises that sound like someone running and two voices... --

Voice 1: * Out of breath * I think we lost him.

Voice 2: What makes you think that?! I shot him in the chest five times, but he still got up! You saw it! You're the one that drove the axe into his skull! It didn't even phase him, and you think we lost him by running through the woods and hiding behind this tree?! Your crazy. I'm outta here!

-- More running --

Voice 1: Johnny, wait!! Don't leave me here! Johnny!! Johnny! Jon... Johnny?

-- A loud swish rings through the air ending with the rather sickening squishing sound of someone's throat being cut clean through. --

HOLY CRAP!!!

-- The camera spins around just in time to see a man sitting in a reclining chair topple over backwards. Another man sits in a chair beside him is pointing and laughing hystericaly. The first man jumps up and trys his best to regain his composure. In the dim light that the television gives off we see him set the chair upright and sit back down, not saying a word. The other man speaks between fits of laughter. --

"Dynamite" Dave Drexxel: Scott, you chicken. It's just a movie for God's sake.

Scott "The Sh*t" Tokage: Shut up Dave, I wasn't scared. I just uh... had to get up and move around for a second. We've been sitting here for hours!

Dave: You want to look good in our first match in the EWA, don't you? Yes? Well then, we've got to sit here and do the neccessary research.

Scott: * Looks inquisitively over at Dave * By watching horror movies?

Dave: YES! I already told you. We're facing a team called The Monster Squad and...

Scott: Monster Squad? I thought you said we're facing The Nightmare Creatures.

Dave: Monster Squad, Nightmare Creatures, it doesn't really matter does it? The whole point is that they seem to be into this whole scary, horror genre and we need to take the proper steps in order to make ourselves look good. What better way to do just that than to watch every horror movie we can get our hands on? That way we'll know what to expect from these jokers and we'll ease our way into our first EWA victory! Now, am I right or am I right or am I right?

Scott: I guess, but damn am I tired. For the past three days we've trained all day and stared at the T.V. all night. We've seen Zombie, Night of the Zombies, Attack of the Zombies, Tomb of the Zombies, Tomb of the Blind Dead, Return of the living Dead one, two, and three, Dead Alive, Dawn of the Dead, Day of the Dead, Night of the Living Dead, Night of the Creeps, Night Shift, Night Stalker, Night Strangler, and let's not forget the Nightmare on Elm Street marathon. I swear, if I see another knife wielding maniac or pale skinned corpse roaming around, I'm gonna be violently ill all over the place.

Dave: Oh, stop being so melodramatic.

Scott: * mockingly towards Dave * Oh stop being so blah blah blah. You know, I... * sees something out of the corner of his eye * AAHHHH!!!! What the hell is that?!

-- Scott finally sees the cameraman that has been standing quietly in the darkness of the room. He sits back down and crosses his arms, looking rather embarrassed about his latest outburst. Smiling, Dave speaks. --

Dave: It's the camera we asked for, Scott. Remember, so we can do our first interview?

-- Scott nods vigerously and waves his hand indicating that he would rather let Dave start the interview. --

Dave: Well alright. I guess I'll get this bitch started. You know somethin' Scotty. For what seems like forever, every single wrestling fed has been calling us on the phone nonstop. We've gotten faxes, e-mails, all that crap saying 'Please Bring the Big Time here'. I tell you it's hard damn work being this good. But you wanna know what we said to those guys? Do you? Scott, tell the people what we said.

Scott: Well, uh. We said, uh...

Dave: We told them to stuff it! You wanna know why? Scott.

Scott: Well, we...

Dave: Because we know where the glory is. We know where the true competition lies. The EWA! So now, we have arrived in the EWA The Only Place to Be. It's only fitting because since we're the BEST TAG TEAM in the world, why would we go to some damn nickel-and-dime fed that's run out of a closet. I can't even stand to be in the same room with two-bit trailor trash fat bastards.

Scott: Yeah, that time we spent in that hole down in Atlanta. * shakes his head * God, those guys reeked of stupidity. Having to job to thier lap dogs. Man that sucked. Finally, we've come to a place where we're free to say whatever the hell we want. Do whatever the hell we want. And it just so happens, we want all the glory this fed has to offer. Beginning Tuesday, all you wonderful people will see the fastest rise to the top in wrestling history. Mark my words, within the coming weeks "Big Time" will tear through the ranks like nobody's business. Tag Team gold, here we come!! Oh, and a Light Heavyweight belt for myself.

-- Dave looks over at Scott as if waiting for him to say something more.

Scott: Okay, okay. And something for Dave.

Dave: Damn straight! T.V., European, Intercontinental, it makes no difference to me. I'll take anything that comes my way and mow down all opposition in the process. So now all the EWA better get ready to witness the most talented, dedicated, and extremely sexy duo that was ever created.

Scott: Hell yeah! After all, when you step into the ring with us, you know that you've finally made it to the "BIG TIME"!

-- Dave and Scott exchange huge grins and seem satisfied. They lean back in their seats and continue smiling smugly. Just then the tape that was playing earlier finishes rewinding with a loud --

KACHUNK!!!

-- Scott once again leaps from his seat --

Scott: AAAHHH!!! What the?! God dammit. I'm sick of this crap! I'm not watching any more of this drivel! And turn some damn lights on in this place. We ain't broke, y'know. We just got a signing bonus. And another thing...

Dave: Aww. Come on. Stop whining and sit back down. We still have research to do. What'll it be? "Stuff Stephanie in the Incenerator" or "Chopper Chicks from Zombie Town"? Scott?

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