| DIVORCE "It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultry: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." Matthew 5:31,32 In this past Sunday's Service, Pastor Steve Gouge of Southside Baptist Church, preached a sermon on "Think Before Saying, 'I Quit'." I would like to share the outline of his message with you, as a follow-up to yesterday's message on marriage. Introduction: You may be free to make choices, even wrong ones, but you are not free to avoid the consequences of your decisions. (What a powerful statement!) "Divorce is deceptive. Legally it is a simple event, but psychologically it is a chain ~ sometimes a never-ending chain ~ of events, relocations and radically shifting relationships strung through time." -Judith Wallerstein, Second Chances: Men, Women and Children a Decade After Divorce. "And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?" 1Corinthians 7:10-16 (KJV) Think about the consequences of divorce: 1. It damages our testimony! 2. It damages our understanding of God's Power! 3. It damages our health! (think of the stress) 4. It damages the next marriage (marriage is not the problem ~ the problem lays within us) 5. It damages our children (children need a mother and father) "No one should be allowed to have children unless they can prove their ability to stay together." -Margaret Mead Advice for children of divorced parents: 1. Don't blame yourself for your parent's divorce (It's not your fault) 2. Realize that divorce is wrong but not unredeemable (Jesus died on the Cross to forgive ALL sins) 3. Refuse to be an informer for either parent (Don't allow your parent's to pump you for information ~ they have a tendency to!) 4. If your parent remarries, accept your parent's choice 5. Most importantly, honor your parent's (The Bible doesn't say anything about how your parent's are ~ only to honor them) In considering divorce, what's on our mind's? Where are our thoughts leading us to? Pastor Steve tells us: "Think about the difference between Convenience and Committment"... 1. An emotion-based person makes decisions for the moment; which are convenience-based A commitment-based person makes decisions upon character, being involved for the Lord 2. A convenience-based person asks: "What is easy?" Although some times things aren't easy! A commitment-based person asks: "What is right?" Seeking God's approval 3. A convenience-based person says: "When I feel good then I'll do it." Feeling does not overcome them. A commitment-based person says: "When I do it then I'll feel good" 4. A convenience-based person is controlled by moods. (They study scripture when they're in the mood) A commitment-based person is controlled by priorities (We know what our priorities are) 5. A convenience-based person is Selfish mind-set (wanting to be catered to) A commitment-based person is Servant mind-set (wanting to know how can I serve?) 6. A convenience-based person's Life and Lips disagree (say one thing and do something else) A commitment-based person's Life and Lips agree (talks the talk & walks the walk!) 7. A convenience-based person looks for excuses (can't, didn't, shouldn't, won't are their tendencies) A commitment-based person looks for solutions (they try to correct problems and work on them) 8. A conveienced-based person is outwardly influenced (cares about what the world will think) A commitment-based person is inwardly influenced (God influences them) 9. A convenience-based person will quit during hard times A commitment-based person will continue during hard times 10. A convenience-based person is a whiner (constantly whining about something) A commitment-based person is a WINNER! (in their workplace, their church, everywhere) IF YOU BRING UP NEGATIVE ~ BACK IT UP WITH A SOLUTION! In closing, I would like to thank Pastor Steve for this, among many other inspiring messages he delivers each Sunday. And if you are looking for a church home or would just like to visit Southside Baptist Church please be assured, you will be welcomed with out-stretched arms. Services are at 8:30 & 11:00 & 6:00 with Sunday School at 9:45 (we have a class for ALL ages and invite you to attend). Please remember all the Lord has done for all of us, and if you can't make it to Southside, find a church in your area to visit, to Praise Him and give Him thanks! There's Room At The Cross For You, too! Prayer: God grant us grace that we may maintain the sanctity of Christian marriage. With your help, our marriages can reflect the pure, selfless love that Jesus Christ has for His bride, the Christian church. In His Precious Name, we pray, Amen |