UNDERSTANDING & PRODUCING WRITTEN ENGLISH II

Draft One

Gender Communication: Differences between Men and Women in

Non-verbal Communication

There are many distinctive differences between men and women in non-verbal communication. If men and women do not understand and fully aware of those differences, they may not be able to communicate successfully with each other. A good portion of the meaning created and exchanged takes the form of nonverbal communication. We watch and listen to one another, regardless of the presence or absence of speech. (Arliss, 1991).

When we grow up from children and develop our gender identities, we start to communicate in masculine and feminine ways which are already constructed in our culture. Gender is the social construction of masculinity and femininity within a culture. Communication is the activity or process of expressing ideas and feelings or of giving people information. A gender system, which owns in all culture, that functions to construct what it means to be feminine or masculine (Cooper, Friedley , Stewart & Stewart, 2003). Rakow (1986) mentions communication creates genders who create communication.

Many researchers suggest that differences exist in the nonverbal communication behavior of males and females (Knapp, 1978, 1980; Dittmann, 1972; Burgoon & Saine, 1978; Malandro & Barker, 1983; LaFrance & Mayo, 1978; Payne, 2001). They have used different sorts of frameworks to examine nonverbal communication. Nonverbal Communication includes all communication except that which is coded through words. This includes facial expression, eye contact, gestures, posture, use of space, physical appearance and clothing (Cooper, Friedley, Stewart & Stewart, 2003). According to the differences between gender, there are four areas of nonverbal communication:

Ø          Kinesics (facial expression, gesture & posture)

Ø          OCULESICS (eye contact, gaze)

Ø          HAPTICS (touch and the use of it)

Ø          PROXEMICS (space and the use of it)

Kinesics

Facial Expression is the facial muscles movements. Facial expressions are believed to be shown one’s inner emotion.

Women use more facial expression than men generally(Cooper, Friedley, Stewart & Stewart, 2003; Mehrabian, 1972). Women smile more often than men (Parlee, 1979a), almost twice as much as men(Leathers, 1992). Women are likely to be attracted to those who smile more and are more likely to be interrupted if smiling. Women still put on a “happy face”, smile, even when not happy due to socialized rules of women, need to be more expressive.

Moreover, men are more likely to interrupt speakers who are smiling. They display less emotion through smiling due to socialized rules to remain emotionally neutral.

Regarding to some observations in public, women are more likely to smile at men than vice versa when they first exchange greetings and to continue smiling more when they know each other only moderately well(Arliss, 1991). Men tend to smile most with close acquaintances in communication(Arliss, 1991).

Men smile represent their friendly and polite inner state, while women smile to promote pleasantness with others in their communication(Arliss, 1991).

These differences suggest that males and females are affected by traditional masculine and feminine behavior(Cooper, Friedley, Stewart & Stewart, 2003; Mehrabian, 1972).

Gestures relate to hands and fingers’ movements, Body movements is the movements of arms, legs and torso while Postures include the body positions that can be indentified in the absence of the body movements(Arliss, 1991). These three types of kinesics are closely related to one another.

Men use more bodily movements, they are more open, and appear to be more relaxed than women(Leather, 1992). Males postures are more wide, both at the legs and at the arms while in sitting. On the other hand, no matter what females are wearing: dresses or jeans, they tend to hold their legs tightly together, sometimes locking their knees, ankles, or both(Birdwhistell, 1970).

In reality, the body shape differences in men and women also restrict their gesture and posture. Like females who tend to protect their soft tissue, such as breast area and pelvic region, by constricting harder tissue, like legs and arms(Arliss, 1991). This may explain why women tend to have more close posture than men do.

In addition, the head movement of men and women also has significant difference. Women are likely to tilt their head slightly to the side and back during interaction(Arliss, 1991). But men node their head a lot instead. Henley suggests that head positioning between genders is due to biological differences in height. Men are usually taller than women who require to look up and talk to men, tilting their a side will be more comfortable.

Eakins and Eakins (1978) point out the fundamental differences in the bodily communication of males and females that women show more body tension, less relaxed posture and less backward lean are said to convey submissive attitudes (Leather, 1992).

Oculesics

Eye Contact is the movement of eye that result in mutual gaze with another person. When we are having a conversation, we always look at others’ eyes to provide visual information. It also helps the take turn of listening and speaking.

Women maintain eye contact with their partners for longer periods of time when listening than when speaking(Leather, 1992). Since females are accepted to be listeners in traditional. Men generally do not make much eye contact. Some early research pointed out that female-female interactants to display more mutual gaze than male-male interactants(Arliss, 1991). In a conversation, if male look at other males can appear to be challenged power or status, therefore, men tend to avoid any eye contact with other men(Webbink, 1986). Women avert their eyes sooner when passing people, however, men stare when passing people.

Women signal interest by sustaining eye contact and they break eye contact more, but men signal interest by staring. Eye contact in gender differences shows women are more interested than men in establishing positive interaction with others(Mehrabian, 1971).

Haptics

Haptics is the touching behavior in nonverbal communication. Different types of touch have distinct meanings. Like when we were kids, our parents always touch me to show care and concern. Moreover, parents are likely to touch girls more and more gently while they less often touch boys and in a more harshly way.

Women tend to initiate hugs and touches expressing support affection and comfort, men, however, use touches more to direct others, assert power, and express sexual interest(Deaux, 1976; Leather, 1992). Women more often being touched by men than men do because Payne (2001) describes touch is viewed as feminine-appropriate and masculine-inappropriate role behavior. Therefore, men recognize touching is the act of women, not men’s.

In Judee Burgoon’s finding has shown (Burgoon, Buller & Woodall, 1989) how we interpret touch depends on duration, intensity and frequency and the body parts touching and being touched. Like female, they distinguish among friendliness, love and sexual desire by the type of touch (patting, squeezing) and the place touched (arms, legs, face). On the other hand, for men, where people touched does not act as a distinguishing factor in meaning, but type of touch does (Payne, 2001; Nguyen et al., 1975).

In masculine socialization, encourages men to enter the private spaces of others and to use touch to establish power, they may engage in touching that women co-workers will perceive as harassing(Lapoire, Burgoon & Parrott, 1992). There maybe difference between reality and researches that men touch more than women do.

Proxemics

Proxemics refers to space and the use of it.

Women use less space than men, keeping their elbows closer to their bodies, holding their knees closer together and use smaller gestures during speaking(Evan & howard, 1973). Men are likely to use more personal space, such as many men have private studies workshop that others do not enter freely(Frieze & Ramsey, 1976), while women spatial zones are drawn closer. Some claim women do have spaces, however, their spaces are places they do things for others, like kitchens(Payne, 2001). Since female are perceived to be more social, more affiliative and of lower status, so the space surrounding them is considered more public and accessible than the space surrounding male(Cooper, Friedley, Stewart & Stewart, 2003; Mehrabian, 1972). Women tend to yield space more easily whereas men more often exert control over space.

Territoriality is a person’s need to establish and maintain certain spaces of his or her own(Payne, 2001). Men defend violation of their territories, which are much larger than the territories of women, more actively, (Leathers, 1992). Whenever anyone may want others’ places, female use personal belongings as markers—coats, bags, to identify the place is taken while male use aggressive look to show they ‘own’ the place.

Under conditions of high density, men become more aggressive to regain a desired measure of privacy; differ from men, women curl their body with arms closer to the trunk, look down and behave in non-aggressive way(Leathers, 1992; Freedman et al., 1972).

Conclusion

In gender communication, we can see there are obvious difference in non-verbal communication between men and women. What make up those difference is concern to status and power. Traditionally, men are believed to be aggressive, independent strong and competitive while women tend to be submissive, emotional dependent fragile. Due to this belief, men use more expansiveness in their movements (take up more space, stretch their bodies); women keep their gesture closer to the body. Although people gradually agree men and women are equal, it is still hard for them to accept women using men’s non-verbal communication skills in conversations. Because the traditional believes are deeply implanted in people’s mind; this reflects stereotypes of men and women is still exist.