When Lily thought about it after the fact, she realized that she probably could have guessed it wouldn't be a good month when the headquarters exploded.

But first, there was the phone call.

< Bzzzzzzzt. >

She mumbled something incoherent and threw Adam at the alarm clock, fairly hard. The clock (which, for the record, read 2:30 -- Lily had hung around Sadie's much too long after her shift had ended and was executing her god-given right to sleep until her next shift started, if at all possible) tumbled off the table. She listened for the muffled thump of it hitting the floor, and nodded, satisfied, rolling over to go back to sleep.

< Bzzzzzzzt. >

This time, she actually peeked an eye open, in sleep-groggy confusion. Finally recognizing that the noise was coming from the bright blue Justice Phone, she let loose quite the string of profanities before grabbing it and grumbling, "Yeah, whaddaya want?"

As was probably to be expected, Lily received a long pause in response to that, during which she debated hanging up the phone. Just when she'd decided that was exactly what she would do, a voice on the other end hesitantly asked, "Is this the Canadian Justice Bureau?"

Lily yawned, rolling onto her back and staring up at the ceiling. "Yeah. GPR speaking. And I stand by my question of, 'Whaddaya want?'."

"Oh." A throat cleared. "Liliana, you don't know me, but I thought I should warn you that there's a bomb in your headquarters."

She blinked. "Did you put it here?"

"If I had, would I be calling to tell you?"

"You never know. SuperVillians are weird like that." She paused, suspiciously. "So, wait. If you didn't put it here, how do you know it's here?"

"That's a very long story. But the important part is that there is, and I know, and so you'll want to get out of there."

"Eh." She rubbed at her eyes. "Most of the stuff here is SuperFireproofed. We learned our lesson after Moose's last visit."

Another long pause. "*You're* not fireproof, are you?"

"No, why do you..." The lightbulb took a couple of seconds going on. I'm willing to blame the sleep schedule if you are. "OH. Right." She went to look at the clock, momentarily staring in confusion at the table (which she didn't remember being empty *before*...). "So when's it going off?"

"If my information's right, then in five minutes..."

"Okay."

"...about three minutes ago."

Even as currently addled as Lily was, that was math she could do. "Two minutes?!"

"Yep."

"When were you going to tell me *that*?"

"Actually I was going to tell you three minutes ago. You have a way of getting things sidetracked."

"Hmm. True."

"Good luck, then," the voice said, with a finality that signaled the end of the conversation.

"Waitwaitwaitwaitwait!" Lily sat upright, having finally reached a state that could be considered awake. "Who are you, anyway?"

She could almost hear the smirk over the phone line. "I'm sure you'll find out, Princess."

So Lily slowed down time, as she was wont to do, just long enough to check that no other CJB members were in the base (which they weren't, considering that they collectively *have* a normal sense of time), find Arty and Drew (who for once were *not* engaged in homicidal games and were instead watching a Ren and Stimpy tape), and collect her mascot (which she, as usual, threw on her head).

When CJ found her, she was at the Garage exit on 34th, SuperPets conversing at her feet, Turtle still on her head, and tugging futilely at a very long rope. He stared at her. "Lily?"

She looked up. "Oh, hi KUB." At which point they both heard quite a large "BOOM" and a torrent of flame shot out of the exit. They jumped back in surprise, and Lily dropped the rope, which quickly incinerated. "Damn."

CJ had that look on his face. That almost-unreadable, "the world has gone vaguely crazy and god help us if that means *I'm* the sane one" look. Which is a very useful expression, as it means you don't have to say all those words. "Lil, what just happened?"

"Oh, that?" She shrugged. "Someone just blew up our headquarters."

He blinked. "And you were playing tug-of-war with the bomb?"

"What?" She glanced down at the remains of the rope. "Oh! No. I was trying to pull the Taxi out of the Garage." She paused. "Uh...by myself. By hand." She glared down at the pets. "Why didn't either of you remind me that I can't do that without Faith?"

Arty smirked. "You can't rely on me to do *all* the thinking around here."

CJ looked thoughtfully at the ash on the ground that was formerly a rope, and then took another sip of his Pepsi before asking, "You do realize that the car's fireproof, right?"

"Right. But have you ever tried to drive a car that's now filled with melted sugar?"

He sipped calmly at the soda again. "Huh." Casually tossing the empty can in the garbage, he added, "Lily, do you mind if I ask a question that's actually of some *importance*?"

"Sure."

"WHY DID OUR HEADQUARTERS JUST EXPLODE?!"

The near-shriek of his tone caused her to jump back about a foot or so. "Well, KUB, I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that's because someone planted a bomb inside."

CJ stared at her, which was the most reasonable response. "I figured."

"Then why did you ask?"

He clenched his fists as if he was concentrating very hard on not strangling her, which made Lily smirk happily. "What are you doing back here, anyway?" she asked, before he could say anything else.

"It's my base too, ya know. I don't need a *reason* to come here." A beat. Then he amended, "Faith says you're supposed to meet her at Cafe Aletheia at 3. I figured you'd probably rather have me wake you up beforehand than deal with *her* waking you up if you didn't show."

Lily was slightly taken aback. It showed. "Oh. Thanks." She glanced at the still-smoking exit from the building. "Not that it turned out that I needed the wake-up call. But thanks anyway."

"Yeah, no problem."

They stood there, watching the smoke pattern float through the air, in a vaguely awkward silence. "So," she said finally, "if I leave now, I might make it."

"Maybe..." CJ hesitated. "But, um, no offense, are you going like that?"

Lily looked down at her long burgundy nightgown, the black puffy down jacket she'd thrown on over it being the only concession to the February weather. She pondered for a moment. Then, decisively, she pulled the Turtle off her head, sticking it in her backpack and grinning at Chris.

It took a moment, and then he couldn't help but laugh. "S'what I figured."

Faith's dark brown eyes could extend to an amazing width. Lily briefly wondered if that had anything to do with the whole mind-control thing. "Looks like your morning's been more interesting than mine."

"I wouldn't doubt it," Lily replied, plopping down next to her partner at the bar, and patting down her hair. "The HQ got a makeover. There were explosions involved. Right up your alley."

"Sorry I missed it. Now," Faith broke into a predatory grin. "You *have* to see this *guy*."

Lily perked up. "Where?"

Faith smirked. Whether it was at Lily's predictable reaction or just at the joy of a new prospect was uncertain. "Right over there." She indicated to the left with her coffee cup, to one of the triangular tables, and Lily contorted backwards in an odd way to try and see around her.

When she'd finally twisted into a nightmarish position that would have made her a chiropractor's dream (and accomplished pretty much the same effect as simply turning her head probably would have), she was rewarded with the sight of said guy. Spiky blond hair, the color not agreeing with the telltale three-shades-darker goatee that graced the center of his chin. He rubbed at it thoughtfully as his dark blue eyes scanned the newspaper in his other hand.

"Boy's got a *hell* of a bone structure," Lily commented breathlessly, the state being equal parts due to the new arrival and to the fact that the counter was pushing into a lung.

Faith nodded in agreement. "Not to mention all that *leather*." She grinned. "If I were a weaker woman, I'd kidnap him for his jacket."

Lily's head rotated slightly to look at her friend. "Oh, like that's really why you'd kidnap him."

"Never implied that was the *only* reason."

If Lily had a reply, it was obscured by the fact that her body had decided that incline of the head was the last straw, and she lost her balance, tumbling off the stool.

The blond at the table looked up at the thump, chuckling a little and going back to reading his paper.

When Lily had climbed back up, Faith was snickering at her. Lily blinked. "What? He saw?"

"He saw."

"There you go, then. He's noticed us." Lily spread her hands in a "worship me" sort of gesture. "Do I or do I not have the skills?"

"Oh, you have the skills, all right. And if those are skills you *want*, hey. More power to ya." Faith rubbed her hands together. "We're going in."

Lily gave her a mock-salute. "You're the boss."

"Not last I checked, but I wouldn't argue with the title."

And so the duo arose at the same time, further proving that point-perfect teamwork is always possible when the situation *doesn't* require it. Faith led the way, naturally, with Lily close behind. She stood above the chair closest to them, batting her eyes at her prey.

"Hi," she said coquettishly. This was probably further evidence of her SuperPower, as some sort of heightened sense must be required to make the word "hi" coquettish.

The unsuspecting blonde looked up. "Hi."

Faith leaned over the chair's back, her grin widening. "My friend and I wanted to join you, if you don't mind. These seats being so much nicer, and well-situated to a table, and all."

The look that crossed his face was the kind of surprise that really wasn't all that surprised. "Nah, I've got no problem with that." He glanced to his side. "Do you?"

That was the first either of them noticed that their mystery man had a companion, and they turned, curious. There, in the chair next to the wall, sat another, taller blond, this one's hair a golden color, longer on top, almost hanging in his gray eyes. These he solemnly raised from an issue of Backstage, shrugged, and returned to reading.

Lily just gawked. Oh my lord...those cheekbones could be licensed weapons.

Faith did not seem similarly affected. "Cool," she said, hopping over the back of the chair with an unceremonious "thump" to face the first man. (Of course, this meant that Lily had to scramble to find another chair to drag over to the table, but on the upside no one noticed when she dragged it past Faith and closer to the wall.)

And then, for half a second, everyone just sat around aimlessly. The second guy kept reading the trades, either ignoring or just not noticing Lily's fixed gaze. Faith smiled expectantly at the first guy, who looked confused for a moment, until his friend nudged him. "Oh. I'm MLWD. Or Dude, if you want. That's ShadowGuy."

ShadowGuy raised one hand in a wave without looking up.

Faith took it upon herself to do their introductions, assuming (correctly) that Lily was currently pretty much useless. "I'm Winterstrike, but my friends can call me Winter." She threw in a wink for good measure. "My friend here's Liliana." (There was a pause as, like always, Faith tried to remember what the hell the full title was.) "The Groovalicious Princess of Rhythm. I think."

At this, MLW's eyes lit up, and he stared at Lily. "Princess!"

Lily's head snapped sharply to the left, recognizing the voice as being the one from the phone call. "You!"

Faith and Shadow (whose attention was finally caught by this exchange) glanced back and forth between the two of them. "Um, did I miss a step?" Faith asked.

Ignoring her partner, Lily continued shrieking at her new target. "You called me this morning!"

MLW nodded easily. "I did."

Under her breath, Faith grumbled, "Man, I find random hotties in the coffee shop and she *still* manages to have gotten to them first..."

Hand involuntarily clenching around a spoon, Lily accused, "How did you know about the bomb in the headquarters?"

This snapped Faith back into badass mode, glaring suspiciously at her new friend. "Does that mean what it sounds like it means?"

Dude hesitated, cowering slightly in the face of an angry Faith (as most sane people would). "Like I said, it's a long story."

Lily and Faith exchanged a look. "I got nowhere else to be, how bout you, Lil?"

"Nowhere whatsoever." They turned pointedly toward MLW.

There was a long silence. It was broken when ShadowGuy started snickering and went back to his reading.

MLWD cleared his throat. "Okay, so maybe it's not a *long* story per se...more of a fluke that I found out, really." He paused. "I mean, it's not every day that you see a guy with a whistle in his throat shoving a giant egg with a fuse in the back into someone's garage."

Lily wrinkled her nose. "The Screech....ew."

"How did you know it was ours?" Faith menaced.

MLW gave her a pointed look. "I don't know if you've noticed how *not* secret most of the 'secret' things in the Union are?"

"Oh." She bit her lip. "I'll give you that."

Lily *had* been staring at Shadow and wondering if he had the attention span of a gnat, until she realized the fact that she was staring at him in the first place proved the same thing could be wondered of her. "And you immediately thought to call and warn a Team that you don't even know?" she asked, sounding threatening.

MLWD was speechless for a moment, eyes wandering toward the spoon she clutched like a weapon, as if afraid to answer.

Turns out he didn't have to, though, because she quickly beamed. "That's right decent of you."

"A regular Good Samaritan," an unfamiliar voice muttered. It took a couple of seconds before it dawned on them that the reason it was unfamiliar was because it belonged to SG, and this was the first time he'd bothered to speak.

MLWD shot him a Look, the kind that caused Lily to think, Well, if that's the reaction I got, I wouldn't speak either. Shadow didn't seem affected by it, though, smirking as he turned another page.

"Yeah, well," MLWD answered, still not quite looking at the girls. "We've got to stick together and all that."

Faith snorted. "That's what I heard, too, and you'd be surprised how quickly *that* goes out the window when you make one little trip to the Handbasket; OH, how people's opinions change *then*..."

Lily cleared her throat, bringing Faith's attention to the fact that both guys were now very interested in her instead of each other. "Ignore that. She has issues," Lily said brightly.

"I have issues," Faith agreed.

"Riiiiiiight," MLWD said slowly. "On that note..." He stood. "Break time's over, I must be going."

And he just stood there, the two wondering why he wasn't going anywhere, before finally saying hesitantly, "Um, Shad?"

SG looked up, gray eyes all innocence. "Yes?"

Dude gestured. "You coming, or not?"

He shrugged. "Sometime." He picked up his glass, shaking it. "Finishing my drink."

And then there was an even *longer* pause, where Dude stood awkwardly at the point of the table. "Oh. Kay then."

Faith got up suddenly. "Which reminds me, I've gotta meet someone...someplace." She grinned at MLWD. It was amazing how quickly she could go from hostile to flirty. "Which way you headed?"

He was very disoriented by her change in demeanor. "South..."

"What a coincedence, me too!" With that, her arm was hooked through his. "I'll walk ya."

"Oh.....kay....." He turned helplessly to SG, and said (equally helplessly), "Shad, I'll see you later, right?" Then he glanced at the two girls, and cleared his throat in an overly butch way. "I mean," he continued in his most businesslike voice, "We'll rendezvous later at the usual meeting place. 9:45. Sharp."

SG's expression, to those experienced in reading such things, plainly said, "You've got to be kidding me." Then again, it said that to the less-experienced, too. "Aye aye," he answered, with a skeptical half-salute.

Faith decided to make her move before her captive got even more uncomfortable. (As if the two things weren't directly related.) "Come on, sweet thing, let's hit the street."

All MLWD was able to get out was a wide-eyed "erk" before he was jerked out of the cafe.

The two left at the table simply stared after them, before both breaking out into a wild snickering fit. Then they realized they were both doing it, and caught each other's eye. Lily grinned. She was surprised when Shadow grinned back.

"You'll have to forgive MLW," he said, and Lily realized that was the most words he'd strung together thus far. "He's just a little..."

"Anal?" Lily cheerfully supplied.

He choked on the sip he'd taken while he was thinking. "I was going to say insecure." A pause. "But that works too."

Lily laughed, "Hey, so, are you the sidekick around here or what?" At the face she got, she backtracked, wondering if he'd taken the question as an insult. "I mean...I only ask 'cause...you haven't, um, said much."

"I'm told that actions speak louder than words." He paused, looking bemused, before continuing. "Not exactly. Although I think I may have been registered as a --" (exaggerated air-quotes) "'Heroic Assistant'...some clarification issue. But he's my partner."

"Okay." She was dying to ask about this. She refrained, as her voice of reason, long-buried in the back of her mind, told her it was probably a bad idea to get gossipy with a guy who may have been involved with blowing up her headquarters. Which reminded her... "Hey...I've got no HQ."

SG gave her a semi-pitying look. "That just sink in?"

"Well. You're not talking to the quickest Heroine in the Union." Lily thought. "That shouldn't be a problem, O-Mac's got the hookup, but..." She groaned, and her head collapsed to the table with a resounding thud. "Son of a friggin bitch. The car."

He arched his eyebrows, which, of course, she didn't notice, as she was wrapped in her scrutiny of the woodwork. "The car?"

Lily picked her head up just far enough to make her words intelligible. "Think sugar in the gas tank...and times it by about 5000."

"Hmm." He leaned on one fist, deep in thought. (Lily thought it might have been the sexiest thing she'd ever seen, but that's beside the point.) "I can help you out on that."

The head came up farther, hopefully. "You can?"

He nodded. "I know a guy. It's no problem. I'll see what I can do."

She sat up straight, and eyed him suspiciously. "Why are you going out of your way to help me? We just met. We don't even know each other."

"At the risk of sounding like MLW, there's reasons I can't go into right now." He shook his glass one last time before standing up, draping his coat over his shoulder and smirking. "Not to mention that if I told you, I'd have to kill you."

And then he was gone literally *as* she blinked, only a puff of smoke marking his departure. Lily couldn't help it, ignoring the strange looks of other patrons as she stared into the vacated space and squealed, "I love you!"

Meanwhile, on 36th St., CJ was getting considerably less love.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT BLEW UP?" Sean roared, in a voice that was much larger than people generally expected to come out of his slightly diminutive self.

Chris frowned, and checked his ear to make sure it wasn't bleeding. "I mean it blew up. I mean one minute, nothing, the next minute, boom."

"BUT THAT...THAT..." In Sean's pause, CJ wished Lily was around -- earplugs seemed like the type of random thing she'd be carrying in one of her pockets. Fortunately, though, that was the bulk of his sentence. Or, at least, that was all he got out before Shane interrupted crossly.

"You're just upset because you're afraid they blew up your stash of porn."

Xander looked over at Sean. "Hey, you've got a stash of porn too?" At the looks he received from CJ and Shane, he added, "Teenage male. I can't explain any better than that."

They decided to let it go, possibly aided by the fact that Rodney chose that moment to run screaming out of the building, which was a sufficient distraction.

Shane spoke first. "Uh...hi Rod."

The bleach-damaged one answered with a manic giggle, which was nothing unusual, except that it sounded even more unstable than normal. If that was possible. Which prompted his Hero to ask, "......You okay?"

"Mac, you had to be there." Rodney bounced, and, as always, Shane envied him for having that level of energy *before* SuperCoffee. "It was so cool. BOOM!" All the collected Heroes (and the other Sidekick) jumped, and Rod burst into further peals of laughter. "Kinda toasty."

"Uh....huh."

"So, wait, you were inside?" CJ asked, to which Rodney nodded. "And not incinerated. Why am I not surprised?"

"I was in the closet," Rodney said solemnly. (Unnoticed, behind him, Xander handed Sean $10.)

"Do I *want* to know?" Shane mumbled, rubbing his head.

"It was Drew's idea. He wanted to play Hide and Seek."

They looked down at Drew to confirm this, and the mouse shrugged...well, as much as mice can shrug, anyway. "I was trying to get him away from the TV. I actually told him to play Hide and Go Fu--"

"Thank you, Drew." CJ peered down the subway entrance, which was still smoking slightly. "How does the place look, then?"

Rodney paused. "You know that episode of The Simpsons where the beer can explodes, and Homer winds up in a coma, but for some reason, the house was fine?"

"Yeah?"

"It's nothing like that."

"Oh."

So they decided it was in their best interest to head back inside and survey the damage. And the damage *was* pretty extensive. Most of the more important things -- SuperItems, the more personal belongings of the team members -- had been SuperFireproofed (as we mentioned back in the first scene...go on, feel free to go back and check), but it hadn't occurred to anyone to want to protect practical things, like furniture...or large portions of the building structure itself. Therefore, when a large piece of plaster fell from the ceiling and knocked Sean to the floor, it occurred to Chris that the place was currently pretty much unliveable.

"This place is unliveable," CJ said sagely.

(See? I told you.)

"Thank you, Captain Obvious." Sean coughed. White dust circulated. He looked like a miniature Santa Claus. (Xander pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and added the name to his list.)

CJ looked up. "Hey, someone punch a wall. Maybe a lighting fixture will plummet and knock him out." Sean scowled.

"Boys, boys, that's not productive talk I hear." This came from a disgruntled-looking Faith, who sauntered up the stairs and plopped down on the neon red inflatable couch (ironically enough, the only unharmed piece of furniture in the room). "And Skippy, there's already a Captain Obvious, he works in the Recruitment Center." (Xander sighed and scratched off the name.)

"Where's Lily?" CJ asked, in a tone of voice that they figured was *supposed* to be annoyed or nonchalant, but didn't quite qualify as either.

Faith shrugged. "I dunno. I thought she'd be back here. I had....pressing business."

"Uh huh."

Wisely, she changed the subject. "Mac Daddy. What's the ETA on getting this place up and running again?"

Shane was studying the perimeter of the room, looking vaguely nauseous. You could almost hear the cash register in his head going haywire. "I'm not sure. A couple of weeks if we get really lucky, more likely a month or so." His eyes began spinning, and he squeezed them shut, groaning. "My head hurts." A bottle of aspirin careened through the air and into his hand, nearly beaning Lily in the head as she stepped into the room.

"Damned showoff," she grumbled, which would have been more effective if she hadn't been grinning like an idiot.

CJ was nonplussed. "Where've you been?"

"Making friends and influencing people. Naturally." She bounded onto the couch (causing it to start making a suspicious hissing noise, which they all optimistically ignored), landing next to Faith and studying her expression. "Unreceptive to your charms, babe?"

Faith jutted her chin out stubbornly. "Just playing hard to get. First meeting and all. Give it time."

"Okay." Lily glanced dramatically around, before observing, "You know something, guys, the place doesn't look good."

(They decided that, on the whole, it was just easier to let that one slide.)

Still clutching his aspirin like a life preserver to a drowning man, Shane said, "I'll get the construction guys in here ASAP."

"Cool." And thus, having delegated the responsibility to someone else, Lily's eyes immediately glazed over. She stared dreamily into space, not hearing a word anyone said for the rest of the meeting.

It was probably best that no one asked why.

As you've probably guessed, evil was afoot, but, well, isn't it always?

Though to be more accurate, evil *would* have been afoot, if it could find the right shoes.

"Aww, *man*!" This rang out, in the dulcet tones of one Blond Blunder, from underneath a large, fluffy pink bed. "I know they're around here somewhere."

Thus preoccupied, she barely heard the buzzer, even though it had been dutifully buzzing in its extremely annoying fashion for the better part of ten minutes. In fact, she probably *still* wouldn't have noticed it if not for the fact that it was suddenly accompanied by a frustrated (if slightly arrhythmic) pounding on the door.

(Altogether, it was sheer luck that the one seeking entry even *heard* the muffled, "Yeah, it's open!" that he got in return.)

If Lindsey was irritated when he opened the door, then he was positively peeved when he stepped in and was pelted by a plethora of flying purple platforms. (Hooray for alliteration!) Scowling, he called, "Buffy, are you here, or is this supposed to be your warped version of a burglar alarm?"

BB's head poked out from under the dust ruffle, coif oddly immaculate. "Oh, hi Stumpy, it's just you."

I don't know why I bother, the Defender of Evil groaned inwardly. "Yeah. Just me. We're supposed to have an appointment, remember?"

"We are?" (Lindsey ducked a clog that came with the question.) "I thought we were just going to sit around and compare evil plans and be all supervillainy and hot."

Lindsey muttered something along the lines of not being paid enough to make up for his occupational hazards. Except shorter, and with more bleepable words.

"What? I can't hear you."

Raising his voice, he covered, "I said, 'How's your operation going?'"

There was a pause, and BB sounded confused as she said, "That's weird, it didn't sound anything like that from here."

"It's because you're under the bed."

"Huh. Well, it's going great!"

The enthusiasm in her voice caught Lindsey off-guard -- especially considering that, if one were to believe his files, Buffy's plans rarely if ever went smoothly enough to qualify as "great". "It is?"

"Yeah! Except for the part where it's started."

Lindsey fought the urge to puncture his brain with a stray stilletto.

"Stumpy? Did you say something?"

"Of course not. It'd be a waste of words."

He wasn't sure whether he was glad or disappointed that she hadn't caught that. "I thought so. How about you guys, how's your plan?"

A pause. "It definitely started with a bang."

"That sounds fun." Buffy's tone was almost morose. "I wish I got to bang someone in my plan."

There was a long silence, where Lindsey just *stared* at the vaguely rustling bedspread. Finally, sounding a bit choked, he asked, "I have to know. *Why* is Vince so interested in your plan? What could possibly make him think it's something the UCW needs to be involved with???" (The "And why me, for the love of God! Why ME?!" that went along with that stayed merely implied.)

Back as her normal, chipper self, BB replied, "I don't know. It's so sweet, though, I never thought I'd have a corporate backer. It just makes me want to run around with limos and champagne and personal assistants."

It was probably for the best that BB was still out of sight, because she missed the purely homicidal look that crossed the lawyer's face at that list of perks. He changed the subject abruptly. "Did you see anyone from the CJB today?"

"I thought I saw the mouse in a train station, but it was just a regular mouse. Why?"

He shook his head, mumbling, "They should be out looking for us for revenge by now and they're not...why?"

Lindsey fell into a thoughtful silence, which was shattered by a sudden shriek. "I got it!"

Startled, and not to mention amazed, he said, "You know why they're not panicked?"

"No, Stump, not THAT!" The blonde head, more disheveled than it would ever let itself be seen under any other circumstances, popped out from under the dust ruffle. "This!"

And as Lindsey gazed upon the beaming countenance of the UCW's newest partner, her slender arm thrusting a silver sandal aloft triumphantly, he did the only thing a self-respecting minion of ruthless evil could do.

He covered his eyes in shame and let out a long, pained sigh of defeat.