By: Denise James
A NOTE FROM ME...Okay, here is what this is all about. MarinerLJ sent out a letter one day, and well of course it got the old wheels turning. Yeah, I hear ya, "Squeak, Squeak," very funny. Anyway, I wrote this little quickie, thus the title, and actually hoped to make it into something a little longer but unfortunately I just haven't had the time. Monica still teases me about the hammer thing. We can't watch a Home Improvement show without it coming up. ha ha. The standard disclaimer applies even in this quickie. I do this just for fun. Life is too short, so enjoy it and the story! Thanks to Lisa for the idea!!!!
Place: the loft
Time : 8:00am
Day : Christmas morning.
Through the window large white flakes are falling. On the left side of the balcony, a small snowman sits, wearing an old Jaggs ball cap and holding a pair of handcuffs in his icy little hands.
Inside, Jim and Blair are sitting in the middle of piles of wrapping paper, each man still in his jammies. Blair's eyes are bright, filled with excitement. His hair is all cute and messy. Jim's hair....Well.....There's not very much so I won't even go there...
^,,^ (Give me a break...How can you muss up a crop??? Besides at first I was just writing this for me.) ^,,^
....Jim's eyes are bright and filled with mischief. It has been a great morning.
Jim has just opened his last present. It's a game. Actually it's one of Blair's tests disguised as a game. *Innocent looking enough.* Jim thinks. "Steven and I had one these when we were kids. It used to drive the old man crazy. I was really good at it too. I used to beat the pants off the kid." Jim stated, as he removed the game from the box.
Blair talks Jim into giving it a try. Jim does, but he's not fast enough. Pieces fly everywhere. "Damn, I must be a little rusty." Jim grins sheepishly, feeling kinda silly after his boasting.
"Yeah, right." Blair glares at Jim, from the corner of his eye, as he picks up the scattered pieces. "Come on. Lets try it again. This time just focus on the pieces. Feel their shape. Study the board. You can do this man." Blair coaxes.
Jim seems to freeze up. Blair realizes that he is on the verge of a zone out.
"Come on Jim.....Just concentrate. That's it....breathe. Just let the pieces fall into place....No...I wouldn't put that one there.....Jim?" Blair looks at Jim incrediously.
From beneath his robe, Jim pulls out an object. Something with a long handle. Blair studies the object for a moment.
"Ummm, Jim?......Where did you get that hammer?" *More importantly, where were you keeping it?....Never mind, I really don't want to know.*
^..^ (Well, If Duncan can pull a sword out of nowhere, then Jim can have a hammer.) ^..^
"What are you doing?....." Blair asks in horror, as he watches Jim stare at the hammer. Jim's face held a look that bordered on insanity.
(Whack!, Whack!)
"No, you can't do it that way." Blair protested. "That's cheating!"
"No it's not." Jim insisted.
(Whack!, Whack!)
"Oh, you wouldn't call it cheating huh??? Well then what would you call it." Blair crossed his arms in front of himself and glared at Jim.
"Being resourceful." Jim grinned.
"Being resourceful??? And you talk about my embellishments." Blair reached for the hammer.
(Whack!)
"Hey watch it man." He cried out, pulling back a throbbing hand.
(Whack!, Whack!)
Jim's constant assault on the board had caused game pieces, as well as pieces of the board, to fly about. One piece caught Blair right between the eyes.
"Owe that hurts!" Blair rubbed the spot, almost pouting. "Come on Jim, this game is recommended for kids 10 and up. Surely you can do it without the hammer."
(Whack!, Whack!)
"Yes!" Jim exclaimed, grinning evilly as a piece finally fit, even though it wasn't in it's rightful spot.
"Would you stop hitting it.....Pieces are like flying everywhere, and I am *not* cleaning up the mess." Blair cautiously reached for the hammer, making sure he stayed out of its path. "Give me the hammer Jim."
Jim held the hammer safely out of Blair's reach, defiantly shaking his head. "Nope."
"Jim...I mean it....right now." Blair was reaching for it, every time he thought that he had it in his grasp, Jim would move it. "Don't make me call Simon. I will you know."
The threat worked. Jim looked like a little kid just scolded by his mother. *You just wait until your father gets home.* "Thank you." Blair took the hammer, sliding it safely under the couch. "I thought that this would be good for your eye, hand coordination, I guess I was right, at least if there is a tool involved....Look, if you do it...just once...I will um....Clean the bathroom for a week." *Oh, what possessed me to say that?*
Jim arched a curious brow at Blair.
"I thought that would get your attention." *I will never have kids. I will most definitely use all of my patients on Jim.*
Finally, after several attempts, Jim did it with time to spare. "Perfection!" Jim yelled. "You see, I told you I was good at it." He finished, smiling smugly.
Blair rolled his eyes. *Oh, please.* "Yeah Jim, you're the greatest."
The end