Rebecca: Samuel my water broke.
Samuel: Well, we'll get you another.
Rebecca: No, my water broke.
Samuel: That water?!

Marty's kid: This sucks it tastes like poo.

Shrink kid: My dad's an asshole.
Samuel: Ok, good. Interesting. Ummm...is that you can maybe elaborate for me?
Shrink kid: Ok
Samuel: Great
Shrink kid: My dad's a giant asshole.

Dr. Krotovick: I wanted to see a change of sceneary. You seen one rat ass you seen them all.

Dr. K: I had you as a babboon.

Gail: Marty who is it?
Marty: It's my mother honey.
Gail: But your mothers dead.
Marty: I know honey it's really weird.

Dr. K: I'm sorry we're a little overbooked ok?

Dr. K: That is why vomen have the babies, Men can't handle the pa...

Dr. K: You have a girl unless I cut the wrong cord. Bad joke.