Daniel: Don't worry I've been house trained.

Carla: I wonder who thought up sex in the first place, Daniel?
Daniel: I think it was Madonna.

Carla to Caroline and Jack: Did you two do it yet?

Daniel: Look at the buses. Watch them.
Carla: Why? What are they doing to do?
Daniel: They pull in, then they pull out, and they turn, and they back up.

Carla: Mom, is this a sex talk?

Carla: But Daniel, you didn't fail by much. Just a smidge.

Carla: Have you ever done it before?
Daniel: Well, yeah, kind of. You see the guys at work, they chipped in and they found this girl and she had a reputation. There was a lot of kissing and hugging and a lot of rubbing, and I kind of finished before I was supposed to. You have to be a guy to understand that.