A place of death...
Of fear...
Pain...
Aptly named.
The tomb of many
Without names.
Of dozens
And dozens--
Only one survived.
And only through
Fate...
And
Fortune.
My loss there
Still hangs over me
Like a shadow;
Stifles me
Like a quilt--
A quilt pieced
Of pain...
Hardship...
Loss...
Torment...
Watching my mother
As they had her
Put to death
Still haunts my dreams...
I never can forget.
The torment
And bloodshed
I was forced to endure...
The prison
I was sentenced to
For the crime of
Life...
The fear
Of death
And pain...
The frustration
Of helplessness...
The loss of
My kind...
My mother...
Myself...
All these things
Haunt me still...
Haunt my days...
My dreams...
I never can forget.
No amount of
Friendship...
Caring...
Acceptance...
Love...
Can ever erase the
Disdain...
Torture...
Rejection...
Hate...
Of the years
At Gargrave.
Nothing can change
What I am...
What I suffered...
What almost brought
My death.
Nothing can change
What happened
To my mother...
To me...
Some nights
***alone...***
I leave them...
***alone...***
I leave my friends
***alone...***
And hide myself...
***alone...***
And cry...
Alone...
Some nights
Acceptance
And friendship
Are no longer enough.
And I leave
To remember...
And cry...
Alone....
I cannot let them see...
In this state--
Vulnerable...
Helpless...
Lost...
Alone....
I cannot let them see...
Alone
A way of life....
No one to care....
No reason to hope....
Alone
Once, it was
All I knew.
Now, a memory....
Even alone
I am not alone.
Even when remembering
Gargrave
I am no longer
Alone.
Alone...
Such a strange word....
How can a name be given
To something like
Alone?
Friendship...
How can this be named?
Words are not enough...
Poems and...
Images...
Stories...
Are not enough
To convey the helplessness
Of being
Truly
Alone...
Are not enough
To convey
The comfort
Of
Friendship...
Are not enough
To bring
Acceptance
Of what I am
To others...
To myself.
I am
Unable to
Accept what
I am....
But away from Gargrave...
Away from
Pain...
Fear...
Hate...
Hardship...
Helplessness...
A place from which
I
Alone
Escaped...
Even knowing
What I am...
Even
Alone
I am free