ORIGINAL DATE: 1/7/99

quick intro to establish setting:

i just got back from a three day skiing trip today. this had been my first time on the slopes, so it was a kind of interesting experience. to keep this primarily beegee related (cause some of you know i could write forever) i'll just say that the skiing wasn't the hard part, it was the STOPPING. maybe some of you out there might have shared in some similar experiences, but let me tell you, there has to be some easier way to stop besides throwing yourself to the mercy of gravity and the ground.

now to the beegees part:

i find myself on my last run of the night and after 8 straight hours of tumbling into and through too many things to list here (to tell you the truth, some of them i can't really remember. blackouts are bad things right??) i decided that i really don't want to die on this last run. thinking that the speed was what was getting me in trouble (velocity, not chemical stimulants...) this last time i would keep myself at a decent, controlable rate. somehow speeding down the steep grade of the mountain my rational thinking figured that my skis would respond to pleading. i kept saying "SLOW..... SLOW...... SLOW....." but for some reason, that wasn't working. i figured why not try singing them a nice soothing SLOW ballad. i started breaking out in song with WORDS. that had no effect either. to make a long story short, i eventually ended up with my face burried in the snow, and my skis 10 feet away, but heck at least i was stopped.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Leave the singing to Barry, worry about learning how to stop standing up!