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Enjoy your stay Thanx for visiting |
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~ Stress & Anxiety ~
I think I could write an entire book about this subject. I have always thought of myself as a patient person who could handle stress and anxiety, in its stride, as if it were part of my everyday life. I have learned (the hard way) that maybe I have over estimated my own threshold limits for stress and my sensitivity to anxiety. I know that everything in my life has improved now that I know my limits. It does give you a sense of freedom knowing what your physical and emotional limits are. The warning signs are all too familiar to me now and I find that I can diffuse or address things before I feel them becoming serious and debilitating.
I have found that stress can be good for you in small doses but can be extremely dangerous in large doses. I know that I was as much to blame for creating the stress as I was dealing with the effects of stress (which I truly thought wasn't my fault). I felt like I was the victim and had nothing to do with the cause. That was everyone else's fault. Boy was I wrong. Stress is a matter of perception and personal tolerance. Stress to me is an inability to find answers or not finding enough time to think about what the answers could be. Stress is unfinished work, emotions that don't seem to make sense and tolerance to ignore what can't be resolved. The key is to confront potentially stressful situations confidently with the intent of resolution, before it becomes a mountain. It is not an easy lesson to learn but a step to maturity and wisdom. Honesty and humility are virtues that will serve you well when dealing with stress.
Many people say that patience is the key to handling stressful situations. In small doses patience is certainly the right answer but one should be cautious. Patience can actually work against you in a stressful situation because it can allow even more stress to build inside you. There comes a point when enough is enough and you have to relax and unwind (or vent) or you will collapse and have a nervous breakdown out of sheer exhaustion and emotional frustration. Unfortunately, through fate and a medical intervention (toxic shock), my path was the nervous breakdown. It was not pleasant and it felt life-threatening, but I know it was a necessary evil. Oddly enough, I have developed more patience as a result of everything that has happened.
I have managed to successfully recover from that awful experience but there are still moments of indecision and panic that happen from time to time. The events are less frequent and certainly manageable but I know the healing process takes time. I know that I still have a weak tolerance to stress overall but I have surprised myself with the things I have endured. It doesn't require medication or alcohol or drugs, it is a matter of self validation and taking a deep breath every once in awhile (writing this book helps). I know that I am certainly a stronger yet more gentle person now. I feel I can give of myself more passionately and with more enthusiasm. My friends have certainly noticed a difference. They say it is a good thing. I sometimes think that I have become too sensitive and emotional but they admire these qualities in me and I can understand the logic. It has made me very close to my friends.
Anxiety is a different story. This is an area of emotional turmoil that requires some intestinal fortitude and self reassurance. There are many things in life that we are unsure of that make us anxious (like writing this book sometimes). The problem with anxiety is that the more you think about it, the worse it gets. For me, anxiety flares up when I have no influence over something that I fear but require resolution on. My only defence is patience, self confidence that I have done everything possible and a nice little distraction to pass some time. Anxiety is different from stress (but can compound stress) because it is usually self-induced but not the result of anything you have done. It is your mind's way of trying to cope with something it simply cannot comprehend and doesn't want to face. Anxiety is difficult at best but can be overcome successfully with a little bit of friendly conversation, a favourite hobby or even a funny movie (or making wild passionate love). The key is to find time to relax and meditate, to rejuvinate your energy and to heal yourself spiritually.
One of the things I have learned about life is that stress and anxiety can be managed well if you do things honestly, with integrity and are not afraid to admit (to yourself and to others) that you don't have all the answers. It is a sign of maturity and it will give you the emotional freedom to put away your fears and to work towards a peaceful state of mind.
Pure and simple..
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- This Storyworx page updated May 10th, 1998 -