Mommy's Diary
Year 3 - New Phase in Tiger's Development
Feb 5, 2002
Today is Tiger's 3 year old birthday. We are very tight in money and time right now so we decided not to have a big party for him. Instead, we sent cupcakes to the Children's House. We went their and sang happy birthday with all of Tiger's little friends and they shared their cupcakes. In the beginning Becky let Tiger pass around the cupcakes but he appeared not to know how to do it. Then when Becky passed them around, Tiger got anxious and followed her and said, "I want one." He got a cupcake immediately and we all got a good laugh.After dinner Tiger had an icecream birthday cake. He had chosen a firetruck image on the cake himself two days ago and he loved it. We put three candles on the cake and Tiger enjoyed blowing them off. Fan tried to take pictures of him blowing candles but couldn't get a good shot so we relight the candles and Tiger got several chances to blow the candles again.
Feb 11, 2002
Tomorrow is Chinese New Year. Last night the Chinese Association had a party at the Great Wall Resturant. Tiger had lots of fun playing with his blue bloons and other toddlers in the center. The organizers asked children volunteers to draw prizes and once they asked Tiger to do it. Tiger stood still with extreme cautions as if to say, "I don't do things that I don't understand." It's very funny. They also had Karaoke. Tiger was so interested. He first watched the screen on the wall, then tried to pick up a microphone. When I asked him if he wanted to sing, he said "it's not my turn." Later I tried to arrange for him to sing a song. It was very late and almost all families with small children had left. However, Tiger insisted that he would not leave until he had his song. And in the last he sang his ABC. I'm so proud of him.
March 4, 2002
Today Tiger got to move to the bigger kids class since he is three now. Lately we've sensed many changes in Tiger. It seems like he knows so much more than before. He knows that baby Michael will come out of mommy's tummy soon and he has already planned to give Michael many things including his highchair, a birthday card, and many of his toys. Sometimes he hugs my tummy and says "I love baby." On the same time, he has shown that he needs some extra love. Sometimes he'll say "I'm a little baby" and ask me to hold him. I guess he is more sensitive because he is aware of the new baby's coming.
March 12, 2002
Lately Tiger is facing so much pressure. The new baby will come in any days now and he knows about it. He is very sensitive to this and these days he has been telling me he is a little baby and wants to be hugged and carry around. We've tried to give him some extra love and trying to let him feel more secure. Then this week his day care center moved him to the big kid class with 40 other children from 3-8 years old. He is a pretty shy boy and has been very attached to his old teachers. When I ask him he doesn't say much but I can see he is quite sad. Then there's grandma coming from China who is new to him. He accepted grandma right away though since grandma really takes time to play with him and he feels the love from her. On the other hand, Tiger's old brother Shang came back from Marine 1 month ago. Shang is fond of Tiger but doesn't know how to play with him. Most of the time what he will do is to chase him around and catch him and smack his butt, or block his way and not let him go until he cries, or take his toys or get something to eat but don't give it to Tiger even if he begs. We tried to talk to Shang about how to treat Tiger and I hope now he is better at this. Tiger knows to say to Shang "don't tease me" too.Thursday night Tiger cried in his dreams over 10 times. He's never been like this before. He used to laugh out loudly in his dreams. He cried for mommy and said "No! Don't..." I don't know what he was dreaming but my heart aches seeing him so sad.
On the weekend Tiger was very happy. We played together. He helped me with his laundary and packing away the Christmas tree. He even initiated to sit on the big toilet to potty. He told me "I like this toilet" and "I was afraid that I would fall in when I was little but I'm big now." I can see clearly he is mentally preparing himself for growing up. He encourages himself to be a big boy, at the same time he wants to make sure he gets the same love and attention as when he was little. I told him that I'm very proud of him. And I ask him "Are you proud of yourself too?" He said "yes". Then he said, "I love you. I love myself too. Do you love yourself?" I said yes. It's really amazing how this little brain works.
On Monday morning, Tiger told Fan that he didn't want to go to Children's House. Fan let him stayed home with grandma. I didn't think it is a good idea since this can only prolong his adjustment. This morning he doesn't want to go again. His eyes were watered when he told me "I don't want to go to Children's House." When I asked him why he didn't know what to say. I tried to talk with him and told him that I understand it's hard because everything is new but I know he'll make new friends and they are all missing him at Children's House. He may be still too little to verbalize his feelings yet. I think talking with him does make him feel better. I hope he'll feel better soon. Poor guy.
Monday afternoon we took Tiger to his 3 year check up. On the way to the hospital he kept asking me "Why do I have to go to the hospital?" again and again. I gave him lots of assurance. Then on the hospital he behaved very good. The nurses and doctor praized him for being so brave. On our way back home, he said "I like going to the hospital." From all these things, you can see how he internalizes his experiences and fights with fears and chanllenges and tries to establish his self-confidences. He is a great little guy. He is 31 pounds and 37 inches. Both are in the 35 percentile. Last year he was only 25 percentile. We are very pleased with his progress.