Domestic Violence Safety Plan

Prepare a safe exit from your dangerous situation. Print & follow this plan.

This Domestic Violence Safety Plan was created to increase your safety and to prepare you to protect yourself in case of further abuse. Although you can't control your abuser's violence, you do have a choice about how you respond to that violence and how you get to safety. You must decide for yourself if and when you tell others that you have been abused, or that you are at risk. Friends, family, neighbors, and co-workers can help protect you, if they know what is happening, and what they can do to help you.

1.

Safety During an Explosive Incident

a.

If an argument seems unavoidable, try to stay out of a room or area that does not have access to an exit (like a bathroom) and also try to stay out of the kitchen or anywhere else that may contain items that can be used as weapons.

b.

Practice how to get out of your home safely. Find out which doors, windows, elevators, or stairwells would be the best ones to take  if you need to make a quick escape.

c.

Have a packed bag ready and keep it hidden in an easily accessible place in case you have to leave quickly.

d.

Find a neighbor that you can tell about the violence and ask them to call the police if they hear a disturbance coming from your home.

e.

Devise a code word to use with your children, family, friends, co-workers, and neighbors to let them know when you need for them to call the police.

f.

Decide where you will go if you ever have to leave your home. You need to make an escape plan even if you don't think that you will ever need to use it.

g.

Use your own instincts and judgment. If the situation is very dangerous, consider giving the abuser what he wants to calm him down. You have the right to protect yourself until you are out of danger.

~  YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE HIT OR THREATENED!  ~

2.

Safety When Preparing to Leave

a.

Open a savings account in your own name to establish or increase your independence. Think of other ways in which you can increase your independence.

b.

Be prepared to leave quickly by leaving money, an extra set of keys, copies of important documents, and extra clothes with someone you trust.

c.

Find someone you would be able to stay with or who could lend you some money if you had to suddenly leave your home.

d.

Keep the shelter phone number close at hand and keep some change or a pre-paid calling card on you at all times for emergency phone calls.

e.

Review your safety plans as often as possible in order to plan the safest way to leave your batterer.

~  LEAVING YOUR BATTERER IS THE MOST DANGEROUS TIME!  ~

3.

Safety in Your Own Home

a.

If you want to stay in the home that you previously shared with the batterer, you need to change the locks on your doors as soon as possible. You should also buy additional locks for your doors as soon as possible as well as additional locks and safety devices to secure your windows.

b.

Inform your neighbors and landlord that your partner no longer lives with you and that they should call the police if they see your partner near your home.

c.

Discuss your safety plan with your children so that they will know what to do when you are not with them.

d.

Inform your child's school, day care, etc. about who has permission to pick up your child.

e.

If you have moved out of the home that you previously shared with the batterer, you should never call the abuser from your new home. If he has caller ID, he may be able to locate your residence.

4.

Safety with a Protective Order

a.

Keep your Protective Order on you at all times. When you change your purse, the first thing that you should move to the new purse is your Protective Order.

b.

Call the police if your partner violates the Protective Order.

c.

Think of alternative ways to keep safe if the police are unable to respond right away.

d.

Inform your family, friends, and neighbors that you have a Protective Order in effect.

5.

Safety on the Job and in Public

a.

Decide which people at your workplace you want to tell about your situation. This should include office or building security. If possible, provide them with a photo of your batterer.

b.

If possible, arrange to have someone screen your telephone calls.

c.

Devise a safety plan for when you leave work. Have someone escort you to your car, bus, or train. If possible, use a variety of routes to and from your home.

6.

Your Safety and Emotional Health

a.

If you are thinking of returning to a potentially abusive situation, discuss an alternative plan with someone you trust.

b.

Determine the safest way to communicate with you batterer, when you have to inform them of something.

c.

Have positive thoughts about yourself and be assertive with others about your needs.

d.

Read books, articles, and poems to help you feel stronger.

e.

Plan to attend a women's or victim's support group at least 2 weeks to gain support from others and learn more about yourself and relationships.

CHECKLIST:  WHAT YOU NEED TO TAKE WHEN YOU LEAVE

___  Identification

     ___  Insurance Papers

___  Checkbook

     ___  Driver's License

___  Money

     ___  Your Birth Certificate

___  Bankbook

     ___  Children's Birth Certificates

___  Passport

     ___  Social Security Cards

___  Jewelry

     ___  Welfare Identification

___  Green Card

     ___  Small Sellable Items

     ___  Child's Favorite pillow, blanket, small toys, etc.

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