Trollerization University Lesson: Reply Trollers and Their Art

Section One: Choosing Your Target

Like most successful trollers, I have found that choosing the best target is the first step towards creating a good trollerism. This may include singling out an OSS freak, someone who plays Everquest, or any other eccentric. Pretty much anyone with 'geek' tendencies will suffice.

Section Two: Analysing Your Target

If you plan to troller your target, you need to define his or her weaknesses. The first step of this process was already taken care of when you chose your target based on being a 'geek'. You must now investigate the target of your trollerism in more depth. If your target has a username on a forum, there's a good chance a bio or homepage link is available to the troller (you) to read and be more comfortable. In a way, this is like "getting to know your enemy", except this schmuck is just a target of a trollerism, not your enemy LOLZ. Previous posts of the trollerism target are also a good reference; they provide valuable insight into the trollerism target. If there is no extra research to be done on a target, and unless the trollerism target is of exceptional magnitude characteristically in posts, it would be wise to resign efforts against the trollerism target.

Section Three: Troller The Fool

So you've got a lot of information on your target. It's time to proceed with the festivities. Compose your reply to the target in a manner which appears benign; your target begins reading your reply post. He or she doesn't realise you're going to be trollering them in a paragraph or so, because your reply is composed largely of relevant and pertinent information. When drawing near to the conclusion of the paragraph, try to work an insult to something which the trollering target finds dear. For example, if part of the post is about "Star Trek", call it Star Wars mid-way through and mention some studies you've heard before about science fiction fans. You'll be well into the task of really trollering this sucker by now. Continue to troller him or her by subtly attacking other favourite topics of the trolleree throught the reply.

Section Four: Wait for it.......

Ah, the big payoff of your trollering efforts. This sucker replies with a point-by-point rebuttal which at least doubles the length of your reply. If you obtain similar or smaller reply-to-rebuttal ratios, you're doing very well!

Section Five: The Classic Troller Finalé

So your trollerism target has replied, you've won the game. Submit yet another reply with "YHBT HAND" or an encoded variant; e.g. "Young Hens Bleed Thoroughly, Hold A Necklace Dear". This adds extra wit to your troller, because the trollerism target will be very upset after deciphering the riddle! Good luck trollering!

Trollerizationism is an art that takes weeks to master, I only hope you will match my level of expertise in that amount of time.