Dr.Joe's Data Base
"Survey of men: sex, virginity, dating, commitment, marriage"
Survey of
men:
SEX,
virginity,
DATING,
commitment,
MARRIAGE
Women
would be surprised at what men talk about when
they're not around. Having been in the dating scene for the past 15
years, I can tell you it's not always like what is shown on T.V.
A little over a year ago, someone very close to me got used.
It bothered me so much I decided to do something about it.
My girlfriend (who designs surveys for a market research company)
and I put together a survey that asks about everything a woman would
want to know about sex and men.
I made over 200 phone calls and got 9 men to answer the 20+
questions. This survey became too big for us, but I hope that someone
could benefit from our few responses or the questions.
I want to let women know that ...
Having sex with a man doesn't help him fall in love, make a woman
more special to him, save a failing relationship or even guarantee
a commitment will follow.
When a man is serious about a woman, he will wait a long time for
sex. Most men would even wait for marriage.
I present to you our survey ... (At the end, let us know what you think)
___________________________________________________________
.
All individuals met the following criteria
Only men
Between the ages of 20 to 29
Heterosexual
No children
Never married
.
Note: Phone numbers were
selected randomly from the Rochester, New York phone book, the first
week of March, 1995.
Note: Some questions were
added to the questionaire after some people had been interviewed.
___________________________________________________________
Question "Is it possible for
you to fall in love with a woman without
having sexual intercourse with her?"
Graph Only respondents who have
been in love.
___________________________________________________________
Question "Can having sexual
intercourse make the difference between falling
in love and not falling in love for you?"
Graph Only respondents who have
been in love.
___________________________________________________________
.
Question
Yes
No
"Did you ever have sexual
intercourse with a woman you were in love with?"
61
Question "If she did not
have sexual intercourse with you, would you still
have fallen in love with her?"
Graph Only respondents who have been
in love and had sex with a woman he was in love with
___________________________________________________________
Question "If there is a woman
who you cannot see yourself falling in love
with, and she has sexual intercourse with you, could that help
you fall in love with her?"
Graph Only respondents who have been
in love.
___________________________________________________________
Question "If
you're dating a woman who you do not have
any significant feelings for, and she has sexual intercourse with you,
could this make you feel that she's special?"
Graph All respondents.
___________________________________________________________
Question
Yes
No
Maybe
"Would you date a woman
just to have sexual intercourse with her?"
340
.
Question
Yes
No
Maybe
"Was there ever a time after
the age of 18, that you would have dated a woman just
to have sexual intercourse with her?"
220
.
Choices: Only the men who answered
"No" to the first question on this page were asked this
second question.
Graph All respondents.
___________________________________________________________
Question "If you were
dating and using a woman for sexual intercourse, what were
the chances that you could fall in love
with her?"
Graph Only respondents who would
use or would have used a woman for sex.
Graph Only respondents who have been
in love and would use or would have used a woman for sex.
___________________________________________________________
Question
"If you were dating and using a woman just for
sexual intercourse, what's the longest you would have
dated her for?"
Choices The Respondent provided
the number of months.
Graph Only respondents who would
use or would have used a woman for sex.
___________________________________________________________
Question "If you were to
date a woman just to have sexual intercourse with
her, but you would have to date her weekly for 3/6/9/12
months before having sex with her, would you date
her?"
Choices 3 Months / 6 months / 9
Months / 12 Months. The respondent was first asked the lowest length
of time (3 months), and if he replied "Yes" then the next
highest length of time (6 months) is asked, and this is repeated until
a "No" or "Maybe" is said.
Graph Only respondents who would use
or would have used a woman just for sex.
___________________________________________________________
Question "If you're dating
a woman who you consider special and she
does not have sexual intercourse quickly, does
this character trait make her .... More appealing or Less
Appealing?"
Graph All respondents.
Graph Only respondents who have been
in love.
___________________________________________________________
Question "If you're dating
a woman who you consider special, and she wanted
to wait for marriage before having sexual intercourse,
would you wait?"
Graph: All respondents.
Graph: Only respondents who have
been in love.
___________________________________________________________
Question "If that meant
dating her weekly for 12/9/6/3 months without
sexual intercourse, would you wait
?"
Choices 12 Months / 9 Months
/ 6 Months / 3 Months. The men were first asked about 12 months,
and if they said "Yes", no more questions were asked. If
they said "Maybe" or "No", then 9 months was asked,
and continued until they replied "Yes".
Graph Only respondents who answered
"Yes" for waiting till marriage.
___________________________________________________________
Question "If you're dating
a woman who you consider special, and you would
have to date her weekly for 3/6/9/12 months before having
sexual intercourse, would you wait?"
Choices 3 Months / 6 Months / 9
Months / 12 Months. The men were first asked the lowest amount (3
months), and if they said "Yes" then the next highest amount
(6 months) was asked, and this was repeated until the respondent
answered a "No" or "Maybe".
Graph: Only respondents who answered
"Maybe" or "No" for waiting till marriage.
___________________________________________________________
Question "Would you seek
sexual gratification from other women while
waiting?"
Graph All respondents. In this case,
the 2 men who were asked, also said that they would wait for marriage.
___________________________________________________________
Question "How would you
feel if the woman you marry previously had
sexual intercourse with another man that she
loved?"
Graph All respondents.
___________________________________________________________
Question "How would you
feelif the woman you marry had
sexual intercourse quickly with the men that she
previously dated?"
Graph All respondents
___________________________________________________________
Question "How would you
feel if the woman you marry previously had
sexual intercourse with other men on
one-night stands?"
Graph All respondents.
Graph Only respondents who have been
in love.
___________________________________________________________
Question "How would you
feel if the woman you marry previously had
never had sexual intercourse with another
man?"
Graph All respondents.
Graph Only respondents who have been
in love.
___________________________________________________________
Question "Would you
prefer the woman you marry to have
previously had zero sex partners or more than zero sex
partners?"
Graph: All respondents.
Graph Only respondents who have been
in love.
___________________________________________________________
.
Question
Yes
Maybe
No
"Do you feel there is a difference
between being in love and being in lust
?"
9
0
0
"Have you ever been in love
?"
8
0
1
"Have you ever been in lust?"
801
Question "Do you find it
difficult to determine the difference
between the two?"
Graph Only Respondents who have been
in love.
___________________________________________________________
Mr. Web counter says you are visitor number ...
.
__________________________________________________________
How this survey was conducted
.
The only extraneous comments that the interviewer used were phrases
like "I understand" or "I see" so as not to bias or
sway the interviewees response.
.
The interviewer was always a man. It was felt that a man would be
more honest to another man, especially about using women.
If a woman were to interview a
man, he might try to impress her.
.
Reasons for the screening criteria
The age range that was looked for was 20 to 29, because that is
the age group in which most men get married.
.
Only men who never had any children and had never been married were
asked because it was felt that some men might be bitter or resentful
and this might sway their opinion.
___________________________________________________________
Author's Opinion
Men are out for either lust or love and they never mix them up.
When a man is out for lust, all that's really important to him is
sex (the conquest). But the woman involved will probably never get a
commitment from him. The reason is because he does not take her
seriously. He's just in it for fun. A man won't use a woman he cares
about and won't fall in love with a woman who he is using.
When a man is out for love, sex is not that important. Then one of
the things a man prefers is purity (virginity/untouched). The reason
purity is prefered is because he does have or could have feelings for
her. When a man is falling in love with a woman and she has never been
with another man, it feels good. But when a man is falling in love
with a woman and she has been with other men, it feels bad. And
the more men there have been, the more it may bother him and the
harder it may be for him to accept.
The way to tell if a man is serious is if he waits along time and/or
gives her a commitment.
Purity has been important to men from the beginning of recorded
history. Several thousands of years ago, the ancient Greeks encouraged
homosexual acts among men so that there would be virgins for men to
marry. Even 30 years ago, the women men married were virgins.
I think people should hold themselves to the same standards as they
want the one they marry to hold themselves to. After all, to do
otherwise is hypocritical.
Send me your comments