commentaries

Red Hawk's Commentaries

Positive Attitude vs Reality

Clearly, the phrase "positive attitude" means different things to different people. Here are my thoughts for what they're worth.

"Positive attitude" to me doesn't mean whitewashing over the excrement of life.

A pragmatic mind looks at all, positive and negative. Without looking at both, and for that matter experiencing both, one doesn't obtain a clear perspective of either. But while intellect can be pragmatic, human emotions often aren't.

Emotions, positive and negative, can possess considerable momentum that can roll over how we perceive things and what we do. For example, let's say you lose something relatively insignificant. If you're feeling rather good at the time, you might shrug it off and not let it ruin your day or keep you from doing something pleasurable. On the other hand, if you're feeling emotionally down, the loss might carry more weight than is due, causing you to think, "I've had it," sinking deeper into the blues, and maybe not doing something that would bring more pleasure.

I call this the hemorrhaging of the compartments of our lives. In its extreme, when it gains momentum, it can be like driving through a downpour without windshield wipers -- all you see is the rain and you're apt to miss some of the beauty around you.

I try to keep the wipers on all the time -- to deal with the many hardships of my life, but not let them keep me from reaching out for whatever pleasurable and/or positive things that I can. If I didn't do this I doubt I'd be here now because damn near nothing of my prior life remains.

Though it's not always possible, I tend to get into a mind set of looking at what's being dealt me by stepping back from me, and looking at the emotions and realities separately. It doesn't necessarily change the direction of the realities of my life, but does help me navigate my life a bit more easily, free of all the currents of emotions.

This doesn't mean that I avoid the currents of emotions though. On the contrary, I savor them and reach out for all of them, good and bad. When so much of life has been lost to disability, sometimes feelings and thoughts are the only wings upon which we can fly. As long as I choose to have another day, I won't let my circumstances clip those wings.

This to me, for me, is what "positive attitude" means.

John Herd

reposted with permission of John Herd

Beth Rittenhouse writes.....

I'd like to share my feelings on a positive attitude. To me it doesn't mean denial or ignoring reality. It means finding the positive things within my reality. It usually requires that I look at the big picture and live in the present moment. For example, I can say I have this damn disease that robbed me of my life and it isn't fair (that's reality but negative) or I can say For the first time in my adult life I am able to stay home, rest and putter with things I'm interested in at my leisure. I like to think that I have retired after a life of work and now I'm able to do what I want when I feel like it.

I have worked on this attitude and since I've been able to see it this way, I am much happier and able to be grateful for small things that I've never seen in my "other" life.

You are invited to visit Gentle Warrior at her own web site or drop her an email if you would like to discuss her commentary.

reposted with permission of Beth Rittenhouse