Rinoa and Selphie held tightly onto each other's arms, tears streaming down their faces, as a body, covered by a white sheet, was rolled onto the Ragnarok. Squall, Irvine, and Zell stood several feet behind them, faces passive, but eyes filled with pain. Seifer had long since disappeared.
Squeezing his blue-gray eyes shut, Squall ashamedly beat himself up. No Full-Life spells, no Phoenix Downs, no nothing...And it was too late. Even death had a time limit, and Squall was pretty sure it was up. And if it wasn't, well, there was really no way to successfully close those holes. What good was SeeD if it couldn't even save one of its best?! Dammit!
A tightening on his arm had him looking down, and Rinoa looked tearfully up at him. "We have to try," she whispered, pleadingly. "We have to try!" Squall stared at each SeeD member, his friends, Quistis' friends, and nodded. Holding tightly to Rinoa, he led the way up into the Ragnarok and into the cockpit.
"Selphie," he said impassively. "Take us to Esthar."
* * *
Seifer watched from the roof of the Weapons shop as Ragnarok lifted into the air and sped off, disappearing quickly into the distance. Sighing, he leaned his head against the wall, propping Hyperion across his bent knees. "Quistis."
Memories flashed through his mind. The orphanage, a tiny bossy blonde girl constantly separating the fights between Seifer and someone else. Balamb Garden, her graduation and initiation into SeeD as a pretty fifteen year old, more mature than everyone else her age, a child prodigy. A beautiful golden woman, an instructor at eighteen, with eyes the color of the sea's deepest depths, her scolding, her nitpicking.
Her habits. The glasses she really did not need. The glasses that she habitually took on and off as a nervous habit. Her hairclip: whenever she put it in, she did so with enough force to stick the thing through her head. Seifer grimaced as the image of spikes protruding from her naked form filled his mind. He shook his head. Her sigh. She stared at a person for a few moments, tilted her head to one side, closed her eyes while turning it away, then settling it back in the original tilt with a small exasperated smile. Seifer's green eyes fluttered closed. She hadn't visited only Squall at the end of that training session; she had been in his room right after to make sure he was okay. Of course, once she had indeed affirmed that he was fine, she'd gone off on him. But that was her way. Her lack of leadership qualities. Well, her teaching had been fine, but her compassion for others and willingness to give multiple chances for mistakes made her weak. "Damn you, Quistis," Seifer murmured. "Why'd you have to die?"
Someone cleared their throat, and uninterestedly, Seifer let his head flop in that direction. Paige and Joe stood some ten feet away, with Lila a few steps behind them. "Seifer..."
"I didn't want your help," he told them.
All three of them blinked. "But you-"
"You don't understand, do you?! She's DEAD!" Seifer threw Hyperion across the roof and buried his face in his arms. "You just don't fucking have a clue!"
Paige bit her lip, and Joe opened his mouth to speak, but Lila stepped forward. "Yes, we do." Slowly, she went towards the contemptuous blonde man and sank to her knees beside him. "Seifer, I'm sorry...I didn't know what my broth-what Martin was doing." Seifer's head shot up, but Lila cast a quick Silence, and instead, he glared at her out of hard jade eyes. "Seifer, you may have wanted to die too, but that would not have brought her back. And why make your friends suffer two deaths?" His eyes burned, with anger and hate, but with understanding too, and Lila cast Esuna.
"I'm going back," Seifer managed, though he was sure his voice was going to crack. Paige and Joe hung back, and Seifer turned towards them. "You can come. But no one can say that you don't know the risk." With that, he turned and leapt over the side of the building. The resistance leaders looked at each other, before following Seifer over the roof, leaving Lila standing on the roof alone.
The wind whipped up, blowing her short hair around her face and rippling her purple top, as she looked up at the sky. She looked to her right at the compound filled with people running around in complete panic and being rounded up by uniformed SeeD and Timber police. Then she looked to her left at the way Seifer had gone, and then at the ground in front of her, letting the tears fall. She was alone.
"Lila!"
The young sorceress lifted her head, and met a pair of gray eyes. The redhead poking her head over the side tilted her head and asked,"Aren't you coming?" At Lila's hesitant nod, Paige grinned and dropped down. "Hurry up!" she yelled up, and quickly Lila stood. She noticed the Hyperion cast aside and made her way towards it, picking it up reverently, staring at the blood on the sharp edge. "Martin..." she murmured, before casting one last glance at the compound. "I’m sorry."
With that, she leapt over the edge and ran clumsily after the others, Hyperion in her grasp.
* * *

2 days later...

"A leave of absence?" Squall stared at the papers in his hand, then back up at the blonde in front of him. "But you just got back."
"I just need some time. I-," Seifer broke off, glaring at his Commander, eyes filled with heartbreak attempted to be disguised by anger. "Squall, I need some time."
The brunette leader of SeeD gazed at his longtime rival for what seemed like an eternity, before he nodded. "Very well, Mr. Almasy. During your leave of absence, you will still receive your monthly salary, a quarter of which will be deposited into your account every week. Garden reserves the right to call you back should the need arise. Do you understand?"
Seifer saluted crisply. "Understood."
"Good. Dismissed," Squall sat at his desk and Seifer turned to leave. "Oh, and Mr. Almasy?" The blonde man turned back around, anxious at whatever the Commander was going to say. But it wasn't the Commander who spoke. It was Squall. "Take as long as you need."
Unused to this kind of thing, Seifer nodded his thanks and left the room.
Squall watched him go, and picked up the phone.
"Hello?" A cheerful, but tired voice on the other line.
"Rinoa. Any news?"
"None."
"Thanks...I love you."
"I love you too."
* * *
"Seifer!"
The blonde man stopped and turned, waiting for Paige and Joe to catch up with him. Both were in SeeD cadet uniforms, having been accepted into Garden for training. "Yo." He set his bags down.
"Where are you going?" Paige tilted her head, gray eyes wide with worry.
"Just taking a leave of absence." Seifer forced a smirk. "Gonna miss getting into my pants, Paige?"
The redhead raised an eyebrow. "Am I that transparent?"
"Just like every other woman on this planet," he responded bitterly, before running a hand over his face and through his hair. "Fuck." Neither Joe nor Paige said anything, but the understanding passed between all three of them. Joe quickly changed the subject.
"Have you seen Lila? We haven't seen her since we got back."
Seifer shrugged, indifferently. "I haven't seen anybody." For lack of interest in seeing anyone except those who made the attempt to go out of their way to find him. He'd spent all of his time in the training center or down on the beach, staring out at the ocean. Most of the time screaming at the ocean. Not that anyone listened of course.
Suddenly, Paige threw her arms around him. He stiffened, but relaxed, although he did not return the hug. She pressed a small kiss to his cheek and stepped back. "Come back soon, Seifer." With a quick, sad smile, she turned and ran towards the dorms.
Both men watched her go, before Joe turned back to Seifer. He held out a hand. "Heal, man." Seifer took the hand, shook it, then picked up his bags.
He walked out of Garden without looking back.