Believe me, marriage has nothing to do with the male/female thing, because there will be neither male nor female in Heaven! So it must run deeper. Deeper??? Yes, down to our very souls. It has to do with O-B-E-D-I-E-N-C-E, will you or won't you?? We have been given the blueprints for how He wants our homes to be built, if we decide we know better then He and built another way, it will turn out to be a lopsided house.

And it takes "2" to be obedient. The husband is to love his wife just like Christ loves the Church. Men wonder why women are so driven to take care of themselves... because, most men aren't doing a very good job of it, I'm afraid. But then there are some women who like walking all over a good thing. We had better start taking long hard looks at the ones we intend to spend the rest of our lives with, instead of letting our libidos lead us!!!

The husband is not the wife's key to heaven and the wife is not the husband's key to get to heaven. We will all stand before God on our own two feet. The wife cannot carry the whole load of the marriage neither can the man. But it seems a lot of churches today are making martyrs out of the women who are in bad marriages. The husband won't do the things he needs to be doing to be "in" Christ and the churches aren't doing a thing to help, except to tell the wife she is "his" key, "so hang in there honey, we're all tested and tried. You'll get a crown for this."

Women CANNOT submit 100% to a man she doesn't respect and who doesn't treat her well. True, he can make her submit but Jesus didn't have to make anyone submit to His love, did He? You want to come before love and say "Let me please you."

The man is to love his wife as Christ loved the Church. Yes, Jesus died for the Church BUT before he did that... he died out to it.

What do you mean by that? He didn't have to have his own way. Of course, he prayed twice, "Let this cup pass from me." In the end, He said, "Not my will, but yours, Father, be done."

He died out to having to have his own way! Wow! What a concept! How many times have I heard, "Women submit, men lead." Well, the first rule about leadership is before you can lead, you must know how to follow.

Men and women both need to know how to follow. God put us together for some reason... only He knows why! LOL But where he may have a weakness, she is strong and visa versa.

SO CHOOSE WISELY WHO YOU WILL CHAIN YOURSELF TO FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

And this goes for men as well as women. People today are marrying for all the wrong reasons (I've been there AND done that!). Choose wisely.

One thing wives MUST remember is that ~he will~ give an account to God for the deeds done in his body and whether he loved his wife like Christ gave him instructions to.

I personally wouldn't want a husband's responsibility. Adam and Eve did not get kicked out of the garden until Adam partook of the forbidden fruit. Yes, Eve was FIRST deceived but it was Adam who in his right mind made the conscious decision to sin.

So therefore, it was Adam who was held responsible by God and then God banned them both from paradise. And it will be the same when God judges His people on that great day. The husbands will stand and give an account for what they were responsible to do without any wives being there to blame!

But also the wives will stand and give an account for what they were responsible to do too. No if's and's or but's about it. The word of God says we are to submit ourselves ONE TO ANOTHER!!! That doesn't sound like only one person doing all the submitting to me!

But the most important thing to remember is... did they submit to the authority of Jesus Christ? Or did some husbands lord over and beat the sheep they were entrusted with instead of seeking wisdom like Solomon did, "Oh my Lord, give me wisdom to lead these great people (wife and childen) you have given into my care."

What about men and women who think they've got the wisdom of Solmon?? How do you handle those? What are you to do when you keep praying and praying for and they keep staying in the same place and unhappy all the while taking it out on you? I'm sorry, I don't know what to tell you. I've come to believe that no matter how hard you pray for someone, unless they want to change... God's hands are tied. So I tell you now... YOU must seek the Lord on your own behalf. Don't let another man or woman seek the Lord for you, YOU seek the Lord for you and go with your gut.