Bill Clinton and Al Gore were discussing their marital problems one 
 morning.
 
 Al says to Bill, "You know, I never slept with my wife before we were 
 married - did you?"
 
 Bill responds, "I don't know. What was her name before you married 
 her?"

- - - - - - -
 
 Bill Clinton was at home, sitting down flicking the channels over when he 
 sees the Miss Universe contest on and starts to watch it. Then the phone 
 rings suddenly.
 
 "Hello," Bill says.
 
 A husky female voice breathes into the receiver.  "I've always wanted to 
 listen to your voice while masturbating, Mr. President," the voice purrs 
 to the phone. 
 
 Bill looks shocked and says, "That's amazing!  How did you know I was 
 masturbating?"

- - - - - - -

 The wives of three presidents and a prime minister were talking about what 
 a penis was called in their native languages.
           
 The wife of Tony Blair said, "In England, people call it a gentleman 
 because it stands up when women are entering."
           
 The wife of Boris Yeltsin said, "In Russia, you call it a patriot, because 
 you never know if it will hit you on the front or on the back side."
           
 The wife of Chirac explained, "In France, you call it a curtain because
 it goes down after the act."
           
 After a little while, the wife of president Clinton exclaimed, "In the 
 USA, we call it a rumor because it goes from mouth to mouth."

- - - - - - -