Why does the other lane always move faster? Why do you always find that lost something in the last place you look? Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting? Why do mirrors reverse left and right, but not up and down? Why don't sheep shrink in the rain? Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways? Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio? Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there? Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing? Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo? Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one? Why does your nose run and your feet smell? Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same? Why is it called a "building" when it is already built? Why do they call them "apartments" when they are all stuck together? Why is there an expiration date on SOUR cream? Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing? Why is the word "abbreviate" so long? Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission? Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing? Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss"? Shouldn't it be called a "near hit"? Why are we afraid of falling? Shouldn't we be afraid of the sudden stop? Why is it called a bust, when it stops right before the part it is named after? Why is it called 'after dark', when it is really after light? Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings? How can someone "draw a blank"? How can there be "self help GROUPS"? How do they get all those little metal bits on a zipper to line up so well? If you can't drink and drive, why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots? If you keep trying to prove Murphy's Law, will something keep going wrong? If sound can't travel in a vacuum, why are vacuum cleaners so noisy? If time heals all wounds, how come the belly button stays the same? If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose? If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan? If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen? If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights? If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with? If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress? If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away? Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime? Does a fish get cramps after eating? You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"? You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance? When they ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in? What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of a plane?