NEW DEFINITIONS

The Washington Post's "Style Invitational" asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition:

Adulatery: cheating on your wife with a much younger woman who holds you in awe. 97
Burglesque: a poorly planned break-in. (See: Watergate) 98
Contratemps: the resentment permanent workers feel toward the fill-in workers. 98
Deifenestration: to throw all talk of God out the window. 97
DIOS: the one true operating system. 97
Doltergeist: a spirit that decides to haunt someplace stupid, such as your septic tank. 97
Dopeler effect: the tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. 97
Foreploy: any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of obtaining sex. 97
Giraffiti: vandalism spray-painted very, very high, such as the famous "Surrender Dorothy" on the Beltway overpass. 97
Glibido: all talk and no action. 97
Guillozine: a magazine for executioners. 98
Hipatitis: terminal coolness. 97
Ignoranus: a person who's both stupid & an asshole. 99
Imargination: the fantasy of being liminalized. 97
Impotience: eager anticipation by men awaiting their Viagra prescription. 97
Inoculatte: to take coffee intravenously when you are running late. 97
Intaxication: euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. 98
Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's, like, a serious bummer. 97
Manufracture: to produce items which break after little use. 97
Osteopornosis: a degenerate disease. 97
Reintarnation: coming back to life as a hillbilly. 97
Sarchasm: the gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who doesn't get it. 97
Taterfamilias: the head of the Potato Head family. 97
Tatyr: a lecherous Mr. Potato Head. 98
Telegant: Looking good on tv. 97
Writer's tramp: a woman who practices poetic licentiousness. 97