April 30, 2008(Wednesday)

We had a Pastoral Search committee meeting at night to discuss about the procedure of hiring a pastor. We also discussed about some questions that we should interview him. This is going to be a new experience for us, especially for me!
We also notice that, previously when Cailyn cried, there is no tear. But within the last two days, she got more and more tears!

April 29, 2008(Tuesday)

We went to apply passport for Cailyn so that we get ourselves ready for our return to Canada during summer time. Then I went to play golf while Carmen and Cailyn are with me to enjoy the beautiful weather. At night, we had dinner with Cantonese speaking church friends because one of them (Auau) will return to HK soon and get married.

April 28, 2008(Monday)

I had a pretty long meeting with the professor today. My paper is about the outsourcing structure (multi-tier or single tier) Basically my previous version of the paper has a fatal error so I need to derive everything from scratch again. I am able to show the result when there are 2 suppliers. However I am not able to generalize the finding to multiple suppliers. This is what I need to do in the next few weeks! My professor always emphasize that one great paper is better than several weak paper. And I hope that this becomes a good paper. Let's see where God leads me to. This paper taught me several lessons, especially because I discovered the error when the previous version is almost done, and this will be my job-talk paper, which is the most important paper for my job search. I can sense that God is leading this paper, even consider that I made a huge mistake. (1) Spend time with family is more worthy than spend time with paper (2) I have my own preference (in terms of finding a job), but may His will be done, not mine. I am still learning bit-by-bit.

April 27, 2008(Sunday)

After church, we went to grocery shopping with Cailyn. I took care of her, fed her while Carmen purchases the stuff.

April 26, 2008(Saturday)

We went to Sears to take passport photo for Cailyn and also free family portrait (but we ended up buying some photo too). Moreover starting yesterday, I realize that whenever we took diaper off from Cailyn, she always lifted up her leg, because when changing diaper we always lift up her leg so that we can clean her butt. This is the first time that she consistently response to something.

April 25, 2008(Friday)

Cailyn is back to a month ago today - she is fuzzy, doesn't want to eat and have danger of cluster feed, and is crying loud at night. After the shot two days ago, we tried to be "understanding" and let her have her own way (because we thought that she just suffered the shot). So now she doesn't want to sleep at night and doesn't eat a full feeding. Hope that she will get back to normal soon.

April 24, 2008(Thursday)

Today Cailyn is quite fuzzy. Probably because she has a shot yesterday. Moreover I had a golf lesson today. I am learning how to hit a golf ball. After taking the lesson, I think that I am much better than before.

April 23, 2008(Wednesday)

We brought Cailyn to go to the doctor to have a two month check-up. She is very normal in a sense that her weight is now 12lb8oz (90 percentile) and 23.5 inches (also 90 percentile) but the head is only about 50 percentile. Anyway, she grew from 50 percentile after she is one week old, to right now 90 percentile, even compare to babies in the same age. That is an amazing growth! There are also three injections that need to poke at Cailyn. Before that she was fed with some oral medication and she already dislikes the tastes. She got a bit normal afterward, then we had the three injection. She went from normal, to crying loud and sad after the nurse poked the first needle to her. And then she continued to cry after all three needles. Our hearts are in pain and hurt too. I hate to see my love one suffer, even though this is actually good for her. Now I also get to know a bit more about "hit to the kid, pain to the parents". We tried to comfort her and carried her around. This also has application to our life too. I am going through difficult time (need to rework the project and also slightly twisted my ankle two days ago, but now it is ok enough for me to run). So probably there are some unforeseen benefits lying ahead of me. So I need to learn to trust.
After working out for about an hour, I also went for a swim. After swimming for 30second (yes, only 0.5 minute) I started to be tired. And I rest almost every minute, and totally only swam for 4 minutes. I can run pretty fast for 15 minutes but I Can't swim long. My arm is soar and I lack the energy. Probably I need to practice more.

April 22, 2008(Tuesday)

There are various things I need to do, such as coordinating with pastor's Bloomington visit two weeks from now, and also doing a lot of research. However I still took time to play with Cailyn and went out to have some fun time with her. I know that by the time I die, I won't care my work, my school, my career, my money. I would only think about family members and cherish every moment with them. Therefore I am trying to overcome the urge of working hard, and spend time with family.

April 21, 2008(Monday)

I had meeting with professor in the morning, third business day in a row. Since I made mistake about the project, I am trying to recover as fast as I can. I spent several hours working on this, but having no luck. It is really frustrating. Also I went out for jogging and I was thinking about this problem. Then suddenly there is a small dog bark at me, I slightly twisted my left ankle. I am still able to run home and walk around. Yet I need to be a bit more careful now.
For the last two nights, Cailyn is able to sleep for about 6 hours in a row. That is good!

April 20, 2008(Sunday)

We had a deacon board meeting in the morning, for both the 2007-2008 and 2008-2009 deacons. (The term is from May 1-Apr 30). We still can't find a worship deacon next year! Afterward we met a pastor. Our church does not have a pastor and really need one. However we do not have enough money; hence the deacon board decided a few months ago that we postpone this plan for a few years until we have enough money to support the pastor for three years. However, there is a pastor may move to Bloomington. His son will study at IU undergrad coming Fall and the whole family will move to Bloomington! The pastor is doing a lot of ministering/preaching thing in China so he needs to go to China several months a year. The pastor himself has a very impressive background too! He graduated from Harvard business school, got MBA from Northwestern University (top 3 in USA), worked with some famous politician in Taiwan and now worked with some famous preacher! Most of all, he lived in HK for 10+ years and speak Cantonese! However serving God is not about capability but about personality. We will pray about this.
After church we had a General Assembly discussing about the budget, and also select the pastoral search committee. Being the deacon board chair I am automatically becomes one of the pastoral search committee. I have no experience in hiring a pastor but I am grateful that there is another deacon in our church that has a lot of church management experience! I pray that this will be another fruitful experience!

April 19, 2008(Saturday)

I was supposed to go to take a golf lesson today, but the weather is not nice. Therefore I went to gym and workout instead.

April 18, 2008(Friday)

After found out yesterday about the mistake that I made, I worked on this paper endlessly for the last 24 hours. I hope to recover as fast as I can. I also met with professor and discussed some detail about the paper and let's see how much I can do. We also went to church, and I spent most of the time taking care Cailyn. I think that our role in church changed. We can't participate as much.

April 17, 2008(Thursday)

I worked on a paper about outsourcing for about 9 months. I found out several days ago that there is a fundamental mistake. I finally got a chance to talk to professor today and confirmed that this indeed is a mistake. Therefore I have to do all over again! This is very disappointing consider I spent so much time on this paper. On the positive side though, at least we found out before submit this to the journal, or else it would be embarrassing! Therefore I spent most of today working on this paper. Hope that I don’t make any stupid mathematical mistake again!

April 16, 2008(Wednesday)

The weather is nice again and I went out for jogging second day in a row. I am working on another paper, and as I am running, I carry with me a small piece of paper displaying some results. Therefore I am able to run and think at the same time. Sometimes when I am working out inside a gym, I sometimes put some notes in front of me so that when I am running on the treadmill, I can think too! However I am able to think much better running outside (and if I am running laps, I can't think at all, because I am occupied with counting how many laps I am running and how many steps I am taking per lap. I couldn't stop myself doing this even though I don't want to sometimes).
I am still living my life where I sleep at around 4:30am and wake up at noon, plus late-evening naps (9pm-10pm) too! This is a weird teenager lifestyle but I find that I am quite productive after midnight.

April 15, 2008(Tuesday)

Cailyn was fuzzy for several nights so we are prepared for her to be fuzzy again. However surprisingly she slept from mid-night, rather than from 4am! She only woke up and ate once at 3:30am! And then she fell asleep afterward. I was preparing for a long night originally and therefore I am able to spend most of the time working on my paper.
For the rest of the day Cailyn sleeps quite a lot. I have a feeling that she will not sleep tonight! And I also went out to run because the weather is nice. I also did some vacuuming to our car. I think that this is either the first or second time that I did it since purchased the car about 20 months ago!

April 14, 2008(Monday)

Cailyn changed a lot since we first knew her. She used to cry only if she is hungry. Now she stops crying if I hold her and walk with her (i.e. she is crying for attention), or stop crying if I give her pacifier (and now she doesn't even want pacifier anymore, she prefers to suck her thumb) and sometimes she is just being fuzzy! A few weeks ago she can go to bed by herself, but then pacifier becomes her best friend. However a few days ago she suddenly lost interest in pacifier! Now she sometimes likes to suck her thumb to keep quiet. Sometimes she is just fuzzy!

April 13, 2008(Sunday)

Now Cailyn not only knows how to suck her thumb, she also knows how to make noise (sound). She likes to make sound late at night and that noise cause us hard to fall asleep. She also likes me to sleep on top of me to have the sense of security too. On one hand this is sweet but on the other hand I hope that she will learn how to sleep by herself later. (But I am sure that I will miss this infant time when she is willing to sleep with me 20 years from now!)

April 12, 2008(Saturday)

Even though today is weekend, it still feels the same to me. I don't have to work or go to school anytime in the week, so life still goes on.

April 11, 2008(Friday)

After meeting with professor, I played ping-pong with classmate Wenbin. After practicing with dad for so many times, I find that my skill is much better, especially smashing the ball. However I am still not good enough to win the game yet. But I feel good already.
At night I led Bible study at church. I haven't done so for several months, and it is good to help out in Bible Study. Then I also had sharing with Allen, from the Mandarin group. He is from Singapore and we shared in English.

April 10, 2008(Thursday)

At night we had a meeting with Macedonia group leaders. Since we have baby, we sat out for many weeks. It is good to check how they are doing and provide them with some guideline about how to continue to structure the group. Let's pray that they will continue to grow and be warrior of God.

April 09, 2008(Wednesday)

I am not able to be productive during the day time, it is because I am taking are the baby and somehow I am not able to be focus. I can get some work done, yet I find that I prefer to stay awake at night and work. In fact, I like to work at night even before the baby was born. Therefore I usually sleep for two hours before midnight, and then stay awake and sleep at 5am and wake up at noon. I still have more than 8 hours of sleep!

April 08, 2008(Tuesday)

Today is another day, nothing much interesting happening!

April 07, 2008(Monday)

I spent the whole day today at home doing homework and looking after Cailyn. I also vacuuming cleaning our house, even places that I don't vacuum normally. It is because the previous vacuum cleaner that I borrowed from the apartment office is terrible and does not suck well (the sucking effect, even with the focus tube, can't pick up a piece of tissue paper). They just got a new vacuum cleaner so I am the first one to use it. It is more powerful than before so I have the motivation to vacuum clean the house.

April 06, 2008(Sunday)

The weather is so nice today! It was around 15 to 20 degree, and very sunny! I took that opportunity and went out for a 52 minutes running. I absolutely enjoy this nice outdoor opportunity, rather than hiding inside the gym running on treadmill! I was able to brainstorm about my paper too! Running is a great time for me to refresh my brain and plan for the future!

April 05, 2008(Saturday)

We went to a Parenting group and also a BBQ by fellowship. However we were late and left early for both event (for the case of BBQ, we just dropped by for 10 mins, because it is held just outside our house, yet we don't want to stay out for too long). Having baby means a different level of social life.

April 04, 2008(Friday)

Cailyn was pretty well behaving last night. She did not get any fuzzy so I am able to get some work and sleep. Jacky also dropped by our house to talk for 3.5 hours. Then I had meeting with Prof this afternoon about the dissertation. I have two projects that are waiting for other people's input and it feels quite frustrating.
At night fellowship is group game between the Cantonese and Mandarin speaking undergrad group. Carmen and I have to take care the baby and we left in the middle of the night. We felt like we are the counselor of the fellowship and not participate in those game or fun time.

April 03, 2008(Thursday)

Cailyn was terrible last night. After we returned from the airport (around noon time), we went out for a walk after her feeding. And she felt asleep during that time. Afterward she was restless for the rest of the day. When we gave her the pacifier, she constantly dropped that. And she wants us to hold her. But after holding her, she was restless again, straightened her body. At the very last I gave her pacifier again, hope that she will fall asleep. This is now 3:30am and I originally hoped that I would sleep part of the night (since I was staying awake the whole night while Carmen and parents take care the day shift). However she is so misbehaving and causes Carmen not able to sleep that I decided to stay wake. My plan is to able to go to bed with Carmen together, but this plan is not working out.
Cailyn finally slept for 6 hours! From 3:50am to almost 10am! That is amazing and we can get some sleep. However during noon time when we are trying to feed her, she constantly falling asleep. Therefore at that point I am trying to wake her up!

April 02, 2008(Wednesday)

I drove parents to airport this morning. At the airport, one of their luggages is overweight. And after repacking the luggage, mom found out that she can't bring her hand cream on board. And the custom also found out that they did not have boarding pass and must go to the ticket counter again. I am glad that I am there with them and it is good that nothing bad happened.
I organized the house again. I threw away some garbage and also did vacuum cleaning. I found out that Cailyn like the noise of vacuumed cleaning and would stop crying if I started the vacuum cleaner! Carmen also went out to workout and this is the first time that I was home alone with Cailyn. Everything is smooth, except that she kept on crying.
Now parents are not here and Cailyn continued to require feeding every three hours. I felt like that day and night doesn't matter. I don't need to know what time this is, or what day this is. Previously I still have to wake up in the morning but now with parents are gone, we don't have a fix schedule for lunch/dinner/sleep, probably until Cailyn can sleep overnight.

April 01, 2008(Tuesday)

I played the last set of ping-pong with dad today. Today is about the tenth time that we have played ping pong with each other since their arrival about a month ago. At first when they were here I can beat dad easily. However his game improved alot (mine also improved, but not as much). Today I won series 2-1, with each game either of us only won by 2 points (for 21 point game). I smashed extremely well today, possibly the best performance I have ever had. If I made slight mistake, he would win the game easily.
At night Carmen and I went out for some shopping one last time (with just the two of us). Then we also helped Cailyn for a bath. When Cailyn started to have bath about a couple of weeks ago, she cried. However she now likes to bath. She was a bit fuzzy before putting her into water, but once she started bathing, she stopped and enjoyed. We also tried to use this routine as a signal for her that this is bed time. However we also found out from the last two or three days that she would cry and be fuzzy after bath! Hopefully this situation will change soon!