Max: Hello Wrestling fans and welcome to: IWF Love-Fest!!!
JJ: What the hell are you talking about, and what happen to the IWF Arena? It looks like my senior prom in here.
Max: You like it? I spend all day decorating!
JJ: WHAT? You did this?
Max: Sure did! Did you forget? It's Valentines day, the holiday of love.
JJ: What the hell has gotten into you boy? This is the IWF, the most extreme, the most brutal, the most hardcore wrestling company on this planet Earth. You can't decorate the world famous IWF Arena like this. It's bad for business.
Max: Well, I just thought that we should set aside our difference for one day and focus on what is truly important.
JJ: What on Earth can possibly be more important than wrestling?
Max: Friendship! Speaking of friendship, I got you a little something. It's my way of saying that I've really enjoyed being your announce partner this past year.
JJ: Huh, okay? Is this the money you owe me?
Max: Just open it.
JJ: Why you... In all my years...this has got to be the most ridiculous...WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU LOOKING AT?
Max: My best'est buddy! How bout a hug?
JJ: Damn it! I'm going to teach you a lesson.
Max: What are you doing with that chair JJ?
Whack!
Max: Owww, what'd you do that for. I just want to wish you a happy Valentines day.
JJ: Well, happy Valentines day back at ya, you no good SOB!
Whack! Whack! Whack!
Marv: Well folks Max & JJ our no longer reporting the action so I'll see what I can do. Uh? Hmmmm, I'm not sure what is happening. It looks like Max & JJ and fighting. JJ is using some kind of wrestling move. I'm not sure what it's called, but I've seen it before. Wait a minute, now JJ is pushing Max into the ring.
DING
Marv: Huh, this is awful. Someone please get out here and break this up.
BOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!
Marv: Oh thank God! That sound can only mean one thing...
Marv: Here come Fear & Rage. They're coming out here to break this thing up and talk some sense into these guys. Hey Rage, Fear thanks for coming out here to restore order.
Fear: Get the hell out of the way, senorita!
Rage: Yeah really dude, this is the craziest thing to happen since your birthday party. Someone has to report the action to the fans out there.
Rage: Hello wrestling fans, this is Rage along with my esteemed colleague Fear.
Fear: Thanks Rage. That's right folks, the unbelievable is happening right here right now. Max & JJ are in the ring and...
Rage: WOW! Fear, did you see that? Max just dropped an elbow on JJ.
Fear: Hahahha, that's the funniest thing I've ever seen Rage. As I was saying, Max & JJ are in the ring slugging it out like a couple of 9 year old school girls and the fans are loving it!
Rage: Look Fear, JJ is mounting some offense...Side Russian Leg Sweep right into a steel chair. Classic move right out of my own playbook. Nicely done JJ.
Fear: What do you mean "your" playbook? It was I who did that to you back at Internet Mania I.
Rage: Yeah, well, it's a move I perfected during my years in the Japanese deathmatches.
Fear: If you say so. All I know is, it was just a matter of time before JJ had a total meltdown and went off on some poor bystander.
Rage: Bystander? That pea-brain Max has had this coming for a long time!
Rage: Hey boss what are you doing out here?
Ed: Everyone in the locker room is betting on the match. Just wanted to see you guy wanted to get in on the action?
Fear: What are the odds?
Ed: CalcGirl figures that JJ is the favored to beat Max 2 to 1, but the odds of anyone actually winning the match is 3.0214 in a million.
Rage: Put me down for $20 on JJ.
Fear: Here's a fifty, Max all the way!
Rage: Fifty? You might as well just hand that over to me right now.
Fear: No way man! Max is going to demolish that old fart.
Rage: So Mr. Gruberman, what do you think of your new broadcast team.
Fear: Yeah, are we kicking ass or what?
Ed: Yeah, whatever! If you guy screw this up, I'm sending Neil & Bob out here.
Rage: You hear that Fear, don't screw it up!
Fear: If anyone is going to screw up it's you.
Blender: Please people! It's Valentines day! Where's the love?
Fear: What's he doing out here?
Rage: I have no idea, I thought he was dead! Oh Look, JJ is attempting my famous Powerbomb DDT.
Fear: Famous, I've been kicking your ass for years. I've never seen you DDT anyone, especially ME!
Rage: You probably don't remember due to the brain damage I've inflected on you over the years.
Blender: Can't we all get along?
Fear: If you want to talk about brain damage, I've got two words for ya..."STEEL CHAIR"!
Rage: Yeah, well I've got three words for you! "D D T".
Fear: You idiot, that's not...
BOOOOOOMMM!!!
JJ: OHHHHHHHH, What a DDT! It felt like an earthquake just hit the arena.
Max: JJ, they broke our announce table and Fear is stuck.
JJ: OH NO! The impact from Fear's head going through the announce table shook the entire arena and caused the heavy steel IWF sign to shake loose and fall right on top of The Blender!
CalcGirl: Oh my God, The Blender's Dead!
Ed: Look everybody, the snake is OKAY!
Everybody: YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!
Max: I love a happy ending JJ.
JJ: Shut-up Max!
Happy Valentines Day
From all of us at the IWF