July 25, 2006
now i remember why i hate doing paperwork. sitting there filling out documents isn't exactly a fun way to kill time, eh? we should have electronic cards with all of our vital information permanently attached to our bodies. or barcodes to identify. no more of this paperwork bullshit.

and to clarify.... i've become what i hate. we'll just leave it at that. if you know me well enough, you know exactly what i'm talking about.

*ditching friends to play with a boy
*being THAT girl that takes the boy away from his bros
*staying with someone destructive
*ignoring all good advice (and not listening to a single voice of reason)
*fatty fat fatty
*anti-alcohol
*anti-social
*anti-work
*anti-school

sad, and pathetic, isn't it? i'm not the girl you fell in love with anymore.


July 23, 2006
my apologies for the lack of posts. if it makes you feel any better, i have been posting on my blog on myspace. here's the link. just click on "all blogs" and you should be fine.

the main reason? i've been sick as a dog. and this heat isn't helping at all. my body is acting up, and i think i have a good idea why it's been this way... and i'm taking the necessary steps to finally get rid of this illness. the first step was taking my iron pills. (passing out isn't fun, folks. so take your iron if you're anemic!)

aside from that... just re-evaluating the relationships in my life. not just the one with the boys, but the one with friends. just by the reactions i've received from being completely MIA lately and not answering calls. you'd be amazed at how many people you can weed out just by not returning a call and explaining yourself. but it's good to know that i have good people to back me up and will still be there regardless of how flaky i am.

makes you wonder if i've weeded you out, doesn't it?


July 5, 2006
i spent my holiday making dip and passing out watching anime. how about you?


July 2, 2006
somewhere along the way, i realized that living beyond my means would only hinder what i could do for myself. i thought it would inspire me to do better... not just with what i was doing for myself... but financially too.

what brough this on? i was scanning thru people out of sheer boredom (when you wake up at buttcrack early in the morning but don't have to be in to work until late in the afternoon, you find yourself doing stupid shit online)... and i stumbled upon someone that i work with. let me give you a little rundown on him:: ucsd student, model, loves to shop, comes from MONEY. everytime i see him, he's dressed as if he's on his way to a photo shoot, or going to lunch with a celebrity. he's always dressed for the paparazzi, and usually has a trendier piece (be it a new louis vuitton, the newest& chicest cel phone or gadget) in his hand. i browsed thru his space and it riled something within me that i haven't felt in quite some time.

the urge to shop, and be materialistic. to have everything i have on be a brand name not just well known... but in some cases, people in the midwest would have no idea who it is. not just fashion in the sense of me expressing myself, but also expressing ideas from magazines and fashionistas.

lame, isn't it?

but that's how Librans do. we're inspired by beauty and love. we relish in the luxurious.

i've just learned how to suppress it because i don't have the means to live it.