November 30, 2001
dear erik, yes, i can get that shirt for you at AE. and probably those jeans too. but the shirt only at 25% off. and probably the jeans for 40% off. just send me the picture so i can save it at the store. ... if we still have it. =P and tell me your size too. <3 mar
i miss my computer *sniff sniff* this is the first time ive been on since... i dont know. but longer than since the 26th. because i know that was written at school. i signed on today cuz i had to do some homework. and i dont get homework done at school for some reason.
bah. but today/tomorrow is our final days of PLEDGING! after tomorrow at 8pm... no more of this shit. i can be myself again! but with friends this time. hopefully this will be a full 180 in my life. hopefully. but you know.. still the same. im so tired physically and mentally and my grades have taken a nosedive into a big pile of shit. and it's the end of the semester. i was doing FINE up until last week. good job mar. retard. ugh. and did i mention i only have 55cents (where's the cents symbol on my keyboard?) until december 7th. that's including my available balance on my credit cards. and my saving account. damnit. i need to whore myself out or something. this debt is creepin up my ass and i dont like the feeling.


November 26, 2001
things are a little shaky at home. so im not exactly feelin the holiday spirit yet. its been all rumbly tumbly as far as my relationships go within the family. and ive been way too busy for the pooh bear.
yesterday was the beginning of hell week. im not exactly sure what i should be expecting. so i dont know how to prepare for it. because i know that regardless of what i memorize, im gonna be taking a lot of shit. its just that im not exactly sure if i should be preparing myself emotionally or physically or what. sucks. but im sure ill survive. im sure ill have another mental breakdown during the process, but ill survive. 2 more weeks of this shit and i can be back to my normal life again. but with friends this time. ugh. but im still at that point... you know... that same line that i was at a month and a half ago. should i stay or should i go? because im still iffy on if this is right for me or not. this whole sorority thing. its not like colorguard. colorguard was meaningful. this... this is just stupid. and you know me... i would feel so horrible putting other people through what ive been through. i dont think my conscience would let me. but i cant just wuss out now. specially during the worst week of them all. im gonna look like im taking the easy way out. ugh. ill just keep telling myself what kenny told me... just go through with it. then when you turn active, change it. we'll make a difference. thanks kenny. i hope you feel better. you know you can always call me bro. (okay, not call me bro, as in refer to me as "bro," but you can always call me, bro... as in im calling you bro. shut up)
oh yeah. it's 3:41am right now. i got home from work about 30 minutes ago. and i have 2 more overnight floorsets to go this week. plus markdown morning. and i have hell week all week. and i have 2 exams and an essay this week. and (hopefully) six flags over the weekend. this week is gonna suck. i might as well not even try to get any rest. because its not gonna add up to diddly anyway. bah. nm. i have a couple of hours before daylight. just pray for me this week.


November 21, 2001
maybe it's because im sick. i must be hallucinating or something. or something. or maybe its the drugs. or maybe the lack of drugs that im taking. maybe it's the lemonade. or maybe there was something in my burrito. but things have been turning around lately. and i dont know why. and i dont understand why. ugh. i just dont get people anymore.
i checked my email today. like a coupla seconds ago. i received 2 emails from people that i would have never expected to hear from ever again. but i think one was accidental. but whatever. i was on that mailing list. =P and another was from an old CG sister. one that i thought hated me inside and out. one i thought would bring that grudge to her grave. i thought wrong. a sister is a sister, and this time im not gonna fuck up.
hmm... what else... oh yeah. last night... i knew my shit. you know why???? CUZ IM DAMN GOOD! (yeah right) but i did good last night! bah. you dont know what im talking about. but i dont care.
but... here's a little tip... next time you take a test or something... just have confidence in yourself. and dont think about the consequences. because it's not gonna kill you. and you know what? just do it. who cares.


November 20, 2001
hey. so my momma n my lil bros went to watch harry potter without me. =( they popped by while i was working and told me that they were there to watch the movie. damnit.
that field trip to UCLA and the LACMA wasnt all that. at least i got to eat at KooKooRoo. which was an experience i would rather not repeat. i thought it would be good food. bah. no it wasnt. it was like a kitschy boston market. the food was really ick. but at least whenever i pass by one, i will no longer have that "ooh. i've never eaten there before. i think i should stop by. i bet it's gooood." feeling anymore.
i have an art exam in 15 minutes. i was gonna study online, but i ended up here. (a true sign of an addict, right erik?) no really. i was. but i found out that the material is missing and it's not on the website. it's somewhere in the book. so neeeevermind. i think ill go read after this entry. (and reading a coupla the dailies)
so hey... how are YOU???? miss me? oh yeah. i lost my second pledge pin. needless to say, i will be the ribbon QUEEEN! blablabla. and im sore from dancing yesterday. and today i have a pledge activity. and tomorrow i have work from 9-2, school from 3-6:30, and then work again from 7-midnight. thursday is gonna be GREAT! because ill be so sore that i wont have the energy to eat. which means i wont gain a million pounds right before hell week. which means i can probably fit into a nice dress without all my fat peekin through my dress. woopeee!


November 17, 2001
did i tell you that i got invited to the Harry Potter premiere? on thursday at midnight.. well technically it would have made it friday morning... but whatever. i was invited! HOW COOL AM I!!! hahah. well no. my friend got invited and he invited me. i think he just needed a ride (cuz it was up in HOLLLYYYWOOOOOD)... cuz homie dont drive even though he's ballin. bah. i wish i went. but i reaaallly couldnt afford to (nothing to wear, no popcorn money, no gas money =P) i guess it was for the better. i had to work the next morning. (as if that woulda mattered!) and my momma wouldnt let me go. go figure.
oh yeah. GUESS WHERE IM TYPING THIS ENTRY!!!! im hollerin at you live from UCLA in the charles something research library. eek! im suck a GEEK! (and im wearing the SHIRT TOO!) but oh yes. i love you all that much to write to you when i could be taking in all of the beautiful UCLA architecture. i should probably go snap up some pics... but i forgot to bring film. and i needest some for tonight's little formal affair at the holiday in on the bay.
ive been calling all my LA friends, but all of them seem to be fast asleep at this hour. so ive been pulling loner status all morning. it's okay tho. i should really study. buuuut... i dont know. im just not in the mood. i've been swamped with exams all week. i have a million hours of work next week. ive got hell week the week after this week. and i still have more exams for this upcoming week. suffice to say... i am probably not gonna be hitting up internet land in the next 2 or 3 weeks. lemme bask a little would you please?
this research library bears a striking resemblance to the UCSD library in san diego (dur mar. where else would UCSD be?)down tot he stairs and the signage and the computers. the layout is a little inverted, but its pretty much the same thing. and the lights are flashing. feels like people are taking photos of me or something. what. is the the hat?
hey i had some ideas while we were on the ride up here. well kinda because of the movie we were watching. (we watched Miss Congeniality). yes. i can feel her. because that's ME! except without the pageant part, instead stick in a sorority. EEK! haha. and then another movie came into mind.... She's all that. but im not all that.... so scratch that. i think im more of a Gracie Lou Freedmont/Hart. yes. i am/was a tomboy. all huffypuffy about all this girly shit. but you know... im a pretty pink princess somewhere deep inside. shut up.


11.16.01.bored
bah. the internet is boring. specially when there are thousands of people outside, waiting for me to step out in my bright pink kitty hat. and thousands more looking into the computer lab staring at the fishies in the bowl (im at a computer right in front of the window. and the blinds are GONE! and people can see me clearly through the glass. i think i shall go and mingle. the internet is boring during the day. blah blah blah.
oh yeah. i was supposed to write and email or soething. maybe ill call my bro. hmm... or maybe ill go to Tadais. or maybe ill go (eek! i see a girl with MY jacket on!)
wait. i think the jacket is far more important than thinking up recreation. BAH! i dont like that girl! she's wearing the jacket i wanted (A&F cord jacket w/ fluff n stuff) but couldnt get because the only one they had left was on a diplay and they wouldnt frickin sell it to me because they didnt want to mess up the display. ugh. i hate abercrombie employees. and this girl... has a big bright bubble gum pink backpack. and she's wearing my retro sunglasses w/ some cutsie extreme low rise jeans. is she trying to be me or what? hah. but im taller. ugh. but she has my jacket. and my backpack. and my glasses. what a freak of nature. next thing you know she'll be sporting my ultra-cute kitty hat. bastard.
WHOOAAAAA. the guy thats sitting next to me just received a phone call. and it was on vibrate. n that thang VIBRATED like crazy. it was LOUUUDDD so loud that it turned heads from the other end of the table. geez man. they make specialized toys you know. you dont have to use your phone for pleasure. freak.
i have to pee. and i have gas. shall i wait? nah.

November 16, 2001
so apparently the most popular source of hits im getting is from people that type in "sorority aim buddy icons." that's lame. i coulda got those hits just by typing normal crap. damnit.
well i should be studying for my geography exam... seeing as how i havent yet, and that the exam begins in an hour and a half... and that i have a class right now that runs for an hour n 15 minutes. but... whatever. id rather type. at least im not on aim. that would be really bad. hmm. i wonder how much my warning level is now. bah. im not worried. i figgered out a way to cheat warnings. yipeee!
okay. 8am. that means the library is now open for business. if anyone needs me, ill be in the basement.


November 13, 2001
well it turns out that not everybody is as excited as i am about my new head piece. a few of my friends acted like i was some sort of psycho for wearing it. but hey... its cute. so i wore it. they see stranger things everyday. what the hell is the difference if they know the person being strange? well bah. im not gonna let that kill my mood. i was cute today damnit. roar.
oh hey. i scored a 38 on my 2nd psych exam. bringing me to a grand total of a B in the class. so that means i have to down a red bull everyday so i can score a perfect on this next exam so i can pull at least an A- for the semester. wish me luck. =P
okay. well i have to pee really bad. and i have to study. and im tired as hell because i couldnt sleep last night. certain people signed on at the wrong time. and certain people raised my warning level and i couldnt communicate very efficiently. bah. have you ever been at 70% warning level on aim? it sucks dandruff scalp because you can only send out like 2 messages per minute. so the other person thinks you cant type for shit (which actually works out if you cant) and when the other person cracks a joke and you respond a million minutes later, you look like a dumbass. uh hur hur hur.
so i guess people are typing in "sorority manicure" in google and ending up at my site. hahah. last week it was "jet li buddy icon." i should type in something random so i can get more hits =P like uh.... mating rituals of the bohemian rhapsody. or sorority porn (but that phrase in itself would probably already have a lot of related sites). how about pineapple princess of the late 13th century. boring or essay on the effects of morphine on alcohol abusers. an in depth analysis of the role of Ophelia in Macbeth. a comparison of shakespeare and homer. uncensored images of effects of drugs. marijuana laced with ecstacy. lyrics for Im A slave by britney spears.
should that be enough? okay. let's see what happens. check back soon. ;)


November 12, 2001

check out my new hat! do you likes? no one else does. but i think it rocks. it's bubble gum pink and comfy as hell. and i look damn cute in it. (whoa okay. moment of cockiness there..... okay. the moment has passed).
i went to plaza bonita wif the parents n the pooh bear. saw my old pretzel buddies. saw the same mall rats as years before. and the same people working in the same places. even saw nicmonkey. (she's 5 months n showing! im gonna be an auntie AGAIN! YEY!) nothing has changed. everything is the same. (and im still redundant). bah.
and i've had 2 whole days off. away from work. away from school. and away from the sorority. im tellin yah... i loved every minute of it. its so rare for me to have some time to myself. like real time. not shower time. or sleep time. or study time. im talking about time to get away from the stress and the drama and everything else that comes along with being a busy little beaver.
and i got my hat. and i got my shirt that says "geek." =) that's the best part!


November 10, 2001
whoa. now erik's gone MIA too. how suck. this is what happens when life bites you in the ass and you drown in school and social work. erik, we have to stop being so social. it's killing our um... social lives? i dont know. whatever.
but do you know how weird it is to meet your ex's new bf/gf? without your ex actually introducing them to you? okay now imagine that you met this new bf/gf at a gathering of friends. but not your ex's friends. your friends. now imagine if the new gf/bf will be one of your closest friends in the near future. hard to imagine that part right? well last night, i went to the Alpha Phi Gamma & Theta Delta Beta bonfire up in Pomona. APhiG has a pomona chapter, so we headed up north to go meet them. well as we were introducing ourselves, one of my pomona pledge sisters goes "you're name is mar? what school did you go to?" "uh.. morse. why?" "oh nothing. your name just sounds so familiar.....[long pause] do you know nemo?" "whoa. yeah.... wait.. you know nemo? how do you know nemo?" [dur mar! you're in POMONA!!!] then my pledge SIS goes "HE'S MY BOYFRIEND!" after that just came a bunch of shrieks and "oh my God"s how weird is that? and this girl (oh and by the way, her name is ofelia) n me are gonna be helluva close by the end of our pledgeship. the cosmos are fucked up.
and on the way up to pomona, i got into another fender bender. actually, almost two. the first was immediately after we passed the mira mesa exit. some big ass SUV cut across from lane 1 trying to exit and just barely swiped us. luckily he didnt, but we lost complete control of the crowded little civic on a bridge. but we were fine. and so was the car. then in orange county, we got sandwiched between a red celica and some hoopty. the celica was in front, and the front was fine. they were cool people. but the guy in the BACK of us.... he was a different story. this guy musta been going twice as fast as we were with twice as sucky brakes. because he rear ended our civic, then drove off as we were talking to the people that we rear ended. what an ass. so now joanne has this big ass dent in her bumper. not one that you can just pound out, because the screws that held up this guy's license plate were indented in the bumper. and the rear lift has to be replaced. faack. that was trauma trauma. no more pomona. no more cars! ack! i cant take it anymore!
shit. im stressed. anyone wanna pamper me? i deserve it!


November 8, 2001
coming to you live from love library computer lab... its ME! yeah. i just finished my 2nd psych exam. notice how i said "finished." not "rocked." not "bombed." so im really iffy on how i did. i got around to studying at 6am this morning for my 8am class. i was planning on pulling an all nighter, but i guess God thought i needed to rest more than i needed to study. its okay. at least i knew the core of the material. didnt exactly fail. bah. how sad. hopefully ill do better on my next one. im pulling a B- in that class and i need to pull my grade up to at least an A- to maintain the good ol GPA.
have you ever been lasertagging at UltraZone? because until last night, i was an ultrazone virgin. went with the Betas and my sistas. it was a whoooole lotta fun. even scored like crazy too! YEY! i ranked 3rd of 16.
dum dee dum. i really shouldnt be writing this much because i will probably be back for my break. or maybe ill go take a nice nap before art. then another red bull. then ... BAH. i got a D on my last art exam. FUCK! so that means im pulling a B in that class.
no more school talk. no more sorority talk. no more work talk.
*cricket* *cricket* my sentiments exactly.


November 7, 2001
hello childrens. my weekend looks mighty packed, so im just taking advantage of this computer time (cuz i had to email some shtoof for sorority shtoof) to say hello to you wonderful people. ack. someone help me!
i really shouldnt be dilly dallying online. because im missing Just Shoot Me and i still have that pesky little psych exam in the morning. eek. i should be makin some flash cards or recording a tape or something. but you are so important to me. nm. gtg. i miss you!


November 6, 2001
did you miss me? ofcourse you did! why wouldnt you? bah. im just kidding myself. well ive been gone because every fucking waking moment of my life has been spent away from my room, my computer and my world of internet. work. school. study. sorority. family. boyfriend. not exactly in that order, but i havent even had time to pluck my eyebrows and armpits (eww). so im hairy cherry at the moment. and im taking advantage of my cancelled psychology class to catch up wif yalls.
did i tell you about my promotion yet? i think i did. so i wont go into detail. but they've been killing me at work. and all for what? all for a lousy raise and a key. bah. one month of suffering will be okay. thens i gets mo moolaaahhh!
the sorority has been killing me too. its time consuming, and im not even able to make it to half of the events. good lord. im a robot! but it's hard. im just hoping that it will all pay off in the end (which is in THREE WEEKS! by the way).
had another one of those breakdowns the other night. i think it was nov. 1. full moon and im bloated. go figure. but i was gasping for air because i was crying too damn hard. it was crazy. i think i lost it for a coupla hours. eek. its okay. im fine for now. as if you cared.
and i rented memento. after hearing about it a million times, it finally came out on video last week. my psych professor recommended we watch it because it would help us on our upcoming exam. and it did. i think psych majors get a bigger kick out of the movie because we know exactly what's going on with him. but its a good film. go see it.
and i say film because it's not a movie. my english teacher in my senior year taught us the difference between movies and films. there really is one. i just have to remember what it is.
and i saw cindy's baby. little Annabel. she's the most precious thing ever. (well that's come along in a while) i saw her on halloween. she was all dressed up in a cow outfit. her mom is gonna make her a heffer. awww! but the precious moments cow that i got for her was twice her size. i have pictures, but they're not developed. boo. like i have a scanner anyways. hah! im waiting for richie to send me some via digicam, but he lags. i bet he lost my email addy.
but it looks like everyone is getting out of class now. which means i must sign off and disappear for another who knows how long. will you miss me? trick. i might be back tonight if i get home on time. we'll see.