| One other thing that Colby learned about Brian was his punctuality. At precisely seven o'clock Saturday evening the front door bell rang. Colby was still fussing with her hair when she jumped at the sound of the chime. She had been lost in her own thoughts. On the exterior she had been calm and reserved about her dinner with Brian this evening even though Arlene and Donna kept teasing her about it for the past couple of days. She would never rise to the occasion and show her true feelings. But deep down she was more excited than she wanted to admit. He never called after he left her on Wednesday and Colby's heart would beat faster every time the phone rang in anticipation of his voice being on the other end. She yearned to see his face and hear his voice, all the while reminding herself they were just friends. Yet the memory of his lips on hers told her that the kiss went beyond the bounds of friendship. She had been struggling with her feelings and what he meant to her. Did she want more? And when Barbara showed up earlier in the day she found Colby's bedroom in a complete shambles. Barbara told her it looked liked she had been vandalized and Colby just laughed at her and said she had been trying on clothes for over an hour and still couldn't find the right outfit for dinner. It was just dinner, but she wanted to look her best. This baby meant the world to Colby, but it was getting harder and harder not to feel like she was carrying a watermelon. So with Barbara's help she settled on the soft blue dress with the matching sleeveless coat. As they hung up all her things, Colby confessed her nervousness to Barbara. She had suppressed her feelings over the past couple of days but as the hours ticked down to seven, she had to voice her wariness to someone. She was worried they had depleted all sources of conversation and would have nothing to say to each other and what would she do if he tried to kiss her again. And then there was Rob. Colby didn't want to bring dishonor to his memory by accepting this invitation, but she couldn't deny the strong attraction she felt for Brian either. It was almost more than she could cope with. As she poured her heart out to Barbara, she paced back and forth wrenching her hands. Barbara finally grabbed hold of her and assured her she would be fine. They had spent time together already, so the initial awkwardness was gone. Besides there was always his work and the Wildcats, Barbara chuckled as Colby rolled her eyes. As far as Rob, well he would want her to make a life for herself again. And as Colby had said it was only dinner. Barbara told her to just enjoy his company and not worry about the future. And if he kissed her again? Barbara stopped for a minute. Well, on the surface she felt Colby should just let nature take it's course and enjoy the moment. But she could see the confusion on Colby's face. What did she want? Colby hedged. She wasn't sure, part of her wanted to let go and give over to those banked feelings and the other part held a tight rein reminding her of Rob. Colby knew that this was a problem. It kept surfacing all the time, the feel of his lips on hers. If she closed eyes, she could relive it all over again and Rob's face never entered the picture either. It frightened and thrilled her at the same time. Colby had never imagined dating again, but here she was all turned out. She felt like sixteen and emerging for her first date. Colby descended the stairs slowly. When she reached the landing, she took a deep breath and proceeded to the open the front door. She wasn't prepared for what greeted her on the other side. Up until that moment Colby hadn't given much thought to Brian's clothing. In all honesty she never really noticed, because he had a way of drawing her to see only his face as his eyes would keep her spellbound. His lack of clothing, save for his swim trunks, that day at the club had been disconcerting and that image was still etched in Colby's brain. But the man standing before her as the door opened took her breath away. The blue silk shirt fit his body perfectly giving a hint of his well defined torso underneath. It was open at the neck and the sleeves were rolled up above his wrists. The color only enhanced the blue of his eyes and as Colby looked up into them they sparkled in the early evening light. The shirt was tucked into a pair of tailored, gray pleated slacks that hung off his trim waist. He held a bouquet of summer flowers, mostly daisies and mums. He simply had no idea how he could unnerve a person. Colby swallowed and a smile crept across her lips. "Hello." She opened the door further. "Please, come in." "Hello. These are for you." Brian handed her the flowers. Somehow he wasn't sure roses were right and when he saw the simple arrangement he knew it was what he wanted. "Thank you. They're lovely. Daisies, are one of my favorites." They stood awkwardly in the foyer each a bit unsure of what was expected of them. "Please, come into the den," Colby recovered, "the bar is well stocked. Just, help yourself, while I put these in water." Colby led Brian into a large, well appointed room. It contained all the usual entertainment equipment and large, soft-cushioned sofas and chairs. The long-low windows provided a view of the large yard in the back of the house. On the low sofa table Brian noticed a sampling of various pieces of artwork from soft, subtle, muted tones to bold, vibrant, bright ones. As he sipped from his glass of Pellegrino, he sifted through them all and this is how Colby found him as she brought in the vase of flowers. "See anything you like?" She came and sat next to him. She pulled some others out of a large envelope and spread them out on the table. As she did her hand inadvertently brushed his bare arm causing Colby to pull back abruptly. Brian noticed the sharp movement and reached out and took her arm. "Colby, I don't expect anything from you. I'm sorry I kissed you the other day. Kissing always makes two people think they have to move to another level in their relationship. I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I meant what I said about being friends. So please, don't jump every time we happen to touch each other. I like being with you and if at any time I overstep the bounds of this budding relationship just let me know." "I'm a bit nervous, Brian, that's all. I never expected to be in this position again." She let out a hesitant laugh. "What do you mean?" He had released her arm only to take her hand. Colby slowly slipped it from his grasp. The heat permeating through her body was more than she could take and she needed to keep a distance between them. "Going to dinner with a man, other than my husband." She lowered her eyes and began to gather the prints on the table. "Maybe we should leave." She stood up and Brian took hold of her shoulders. "Colby, look at me. This was not my intent, to make you feel discomfort at the thought of going out with me." The pain on her face cut to his core and Brian felt a strong desire to gather her in his arms and make her forget. But he knew that was last thing she wanted at that moment. He removed his hands from her shoulders and put his glass back on the bar. "Come on, let's go to dinner." She nodded in agreement. As they went to Brian's car, Colby berated herself for her foolish behavior. I've ruined the evening, she thought as he helped her in the front seat. Why can't I just let things happen instead of thinking so much. I want to be with Brian, yet I'm sending all the wrong signals. Oh God, help me. I want this but I'm scared. Brian came around the car and got in next to Colby. He started the engine and as they backed out of the driveway he gently placed his hand over hers. "It's okay. Just relax. I know Colby, I know. I'll give you all the time you need." He picked up her hand and placed a soft kiss on her fingertips before placing it back in her lap. No words were spoken as Brian drove to the restaurant. Colby's heart was pulled in two directions and she just knew that no matter what the outcome people would be hurt and shocked. As Brian turned onto the county road a nondescript black car followed at a discreet distance. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Brian gave her some space. Soft music filled the car and they both used the drive to ponder what they felt for each other. Brian knew where he was headed and that he would have to hold back. He thought about Colby all the time and had to restrain himself from calling her these last few days. She was struggling with deep emotions and familial loyalty and he wanted her to take her time. Yet it was so hard not to hold her and kiss her again. As Colby sat across from Brian she ventured to glance at him a few times only to have him catch her and smile back. She melted inside and fought the urge to reach out and touch him. Yet Colby knew that she wasn't the only one involved, there was the baby. It would be so much easier if she was alone but she had to consider her child too. And the strictures of mourning were strangling her. How long was she to be the grieving widow. Deep down she would never forget Rob, he was her first true love and he would always be part of her. But life did go on and well Brian was here and … and what? She wasn't sure what she actually felt for him, yet her body reacted whenever she was with him. All this was circling in her mind as Brian turned onto a gravel drive. Set back off the road about 200 feet in a small clump of trees was a small house. There were only a couple of other cars parked when Brian pulled in. He came around and opened her door, giving her his hand. Colby looked up and took hold as she got out of the car. Brian placed his hand on the small of her back as they walked up the stone path to the door. As he went to open it, Colby stopped him. "Brian, wait! I'm sorry for the way I acted. I'm nervous, that's all. I don't want to put a strain on this evening." Her eyes asked for understanding. "It's okay. I know exactly what you mean." He smiled and opened the door. They were led to a quiet table in the corner. There was a beautiful garden outside with a few tables on the adjoining patio. Soft piano music drifted from the other side of the room. Once seated Brian ordered two glasses of mineral water and gave Colby a couple of suggestions on the menu. Once their orders were taken Colby went out on a limb and asked about Brian's earlier comment. "So you've been wary about this whole dating thing too?" She said as she took a sip from her glass. "Yes. It's harder than anyone can possibly imagine." He broke off a piece of bread and placed it on his plate. "How so? I would think you could have your pick, considering your celebrity status." Colby waved off the offer of bread for herself. "That's the problem. You can have just about anyone and they will do anything and I mean anything to go on a date. The propositions we've gotten would even make a sailor blush." He grinned at her and Colby chuckled. "Most of the time these women aren't looking for anything long term, just the chance to date a Backstreet Boy or they want to use your contacts to help them in their careers. We're ordinary guys, just like your brothers or whatever. We want the same thing as anyone else. Someone to love us for whom we are, not what we are." Brian's voice grew a bit loud. "Sorry didn't mean to get so emotional. But it's hard to know whom you can really trust with your feelings. I've been there too many times and it still hurts no matter how much you may have learned from past heart breaks." Colby didn't answer him. Just nodded in agreement. She knew exactly what he meant. It wasn't easy deciding whom you could give your heart to. She had even been wary of Rob at first until she really got to know him. But sitting here with Brian, all his cards were on the table. She still had a hard time believing he was this big pop star because he sure didn't act like one. Oh yes, his clothes were designer, but conservative and even though he was well known in local circles, he had a tendency to keep a low profile and not bring attention to himself. It was just as she had surmised before; his family had a lot to do with this. Their support kept him focused on the important things in life. "I guess it's not easy no matter where you are or what you do. I always imagined that people in your profession would find someone easily. It's almost as bad in the corporate sector, fathers looking for good matches to bring companies together. It may not happen so much any more, but there were couples Rob and I met over the years that were 'arranged' to a certain respect. Some of them flourished while others. Well let's just say that they went home together but that was it." Colby realized what she had said and blushed slightly. "Sorry. I shouldn't have said that. They're nice people, they just shouldn't be together." "I understand. Marriage is a big commitment, one that should last a lifetime. But people just don't take it seriously anymore. Our throw away society makes it too easy to give up." Their dinner arrived and they both ate quietly for a while. Colby looked up at one point and noticed Brian staring at her. "You're staring and that's not polite." Colby chided him like a schoolboy. She lowered her fork and sipped from her glass. "What did I do?" "Nothing, just thinking that you don't seem so nervous any more. The silence between us was not awkward but comfortable." As Colby placed the glass on the table, Brian covered her hand with his and she didn't jump at his touch. She let it slip off the glass and rested it in his. Brian's thumb rubbed the back of her hand gently and when she looked up his eyes told her more than she wanted to know at that moment. "I don't want you to take this the wrong way, Brian but it wasn't who you are or what you do that made me nervous. It was the whole idea of dating again. Whether the man be a famous singer or an insurance salesman, just starting over is scary." She removed her hand from his and took her fork again. She played with the food on her plate trying to find the words to say. She looked up at Brian and went on. "It's trying to remember all the things to do, like how to act, what to wear, how personal should the conversation get and should you let him kiss you goodnight. All the things I never thought I would have to do again in my life." She slowly looked up from her plate to see his reaction. Brian took hold of her hand again, forcing her to look at him. "Listen. I would never force you to do anything that would make you feel uncomfortable. I like you Colby, probably more than you realize. I want to be with you and if it can just be as friends, I'll take that for now." He took the fork from her hand a placed it on the edge of the plate. "That's just it, Brian. I like you too, more than I should under the circumstances. And if it was just me, I would throw caution to the wind and jump in with both feet, but I can't. As it is I've got tongues wagging about my behavior. I have to consider the baby. Right now that is my number one priority, no matter what I may feel or want. I have to be sure to provide a good home for him or her and that includes any man that may enter my life in the future. I need to know they will accept my child and offer love and protection too. But before that can happen there are some family issues that I need to deal with." Brian sat back and listened intently, watching as Colby told him her concerns. He could tell she was torn between obligations to her dead husband's family and her own personal needs. And yet all that kept running through his head while she spoke was the thought that he could love both her and the baby, given half a chance. Colby saw how serious Brian looked and decided this line of conversation had gone on long enough. "I'm sorry for turning the conversation into a monologue of my personal problems." She had lost her appetite and pushed her plate away. "What can I do to help?" Brian sat forward and reached across the table again wanting to feel her hand in his again. As he took it, he felt her stiffen but he wouldn't let go. "You can't, Brian. I don't want you involved. I can handle it and besides the less you know the better." The waiter came and removed their plates and Brian ordered coffee and some dessert for them. "I've said too much already. I'm sorry. I've ruined the evening." "You haven't. I'll keep your confidence, Colby. I promise." Coffee and dessert arrived and Brian changed the subject. He related some stories about their travels and the fans and slowly a smile returned to Colby's lips and he even had her laughing. They sat for a long while, Brian doing his best to keep the conversation light and moving. When Colby stifled a yawn, Brian suggested that he better get her home. They drove back in the quiet and when he took her hand she curled her fingers around his and held on tight. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ The PI stayed about an hour at the restaurant and then decided to go back to Colby's and get a good vantage point for when they returned from dinner. The tree-lined drive afforded him the cover he needed. Under darkness his black car could hardly be seen under the trees. He pulled out his phone and dialed the familiar number. "Yes." Garrett spit into the phone. "Where is she?" "Dinner at some small place way out of town, small, cozy, very romantic. She's with the singer again. I'm back at her place waiting for them to return." The words came out cold and unfeeling. "Why didn't you stay, you fool. They may go somewhere else." Garrett chastised him. "Look. I know what I'm doing. He has to bring her home. You want to know how far this has gone. Well, I'm here waiting to see if she invites him in, spends the night, whatever. I'll give you a full report as soon as I know." "You better. I want to know everything. Every move she makes and who with." Garrett sipped from his glass. This disgusted him. He had better things to do. "Have you been able to get in the house? I want those taps on her phone. I've got to get this over with soon so my father can see we don't need her in this family. He can have the child and throw Colby into the street for all I care." He barked the last bit into the phone. Catherine backed away from the patio and went through the parlor to the foyer. As she climbed the stairs, she could feel the anger rise in her like bile. She now had the information she needed. Between what she had just heard and the file she had found in William's desk the previous afternoon, she new Colby had to be warned. Catherine still wasn't sure what they had planned, but she needed to tell Colby and soon. And that young singer, he could get hurt. From what she gathered Colby was seeing him. She so wanted Colby to be happy and if this young man could provide her with a good life Catherine would help any way she could. She dialed Colby's number and left her a message. They needed to meet for lunch as soon as possible. Her husband and son would be stopped even if it were the last thing she did. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ As they reached the front door, Colby turned to Brian. He held her left hand in his right one. "Thank you for dinner." Colby went to put the key in the door when Brian stopped her. "What did you decide about the goodnight kiss?" He gave her a cheeky grin. "I, huh," she let out a soft breath, "I decided that if he tried I would let nature take it's course." She looked into his eyes and saw they were smiling back at her. Brian pulled her close and softly pressed his lips to hers, as his left hand cupped her cheek. It was a fleeting gesture and as their lips parted Brian whispered in her ear, "I'll call you tomorrow." He gave her a peck on the cheek and opened the door for her. Colby entered the house and watched as Brian went to the car and backed down the driveway. As she ascended the stairs to the second floor all she kept saying was, we're friends, just friends. But in her heart she knew she felt more than friendship and so did Brian. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ He clicked away, snapping picture after picture. These were just what Spencer wanted. Well here was the proof. He waited till the singer's car was well gone before he pulled away himself. |