HELLO NATTO

For those of you who have never had the pleasure of living in Japan, you probably have no idea what natto is. Neither did I about 2 years ago when I first came to Japan. My friend, Hiro, (you can see his picture and info at hiro.htm) was kind enough to show me around my first week. I had a new apartment in dire need of food supplies. So he took me to the local supermarket. There he proceeded to introduce the various Japanese foods and foreign foods that I could buy. He showed me umeboshi (which I LOVE!), age (which I also LOVE), and one more food that I was told nearly all gaijin (foreigners) HATE. This was my first introduction to natto.

A PRELUDE: WHAT'S NATTO?

Natto is molded beans. (I could put it more delicately but that's what it is.) It gets worse. It's not the description of its make-up that makes this food disturbing. It is its smell. That is the reason most gaijin stay clear of natto. Imagine being locked in the trunk of a car for 24 hours with only a dozen rotten eggs and yesterday's socks to keep you company. I think you can get the picture...

THE PROBLEM...

The problem, back in that long ago summer's day, was that Hiro failed to mention the above point. ALL he said was most gaijin don't like it. So naturally I didn't want to be like the majority of foreigners who refuse to fit into Japanese society. So I said to Hiro, "watashi wa rippana nihonjin ni naritai." (I want to become a great Japanese!) and bought the natto.

THE MORNING AFTER

The following day, alone, I went with a hungry stomach to the kitchen to test the sincerity of the previous day's pledge. Full of confidence, I grabbed the natto with one hand and raised my other hand in a fist vowing, "Henceforth, I shall forevermore be a great Japanese!" Lowering my hand and realizing, shamefully, that I was talking to myself, I proceeded to open the Natto.

THE NATTO AWAKETH!

So there I was, all by my lonesome, with but a week's training in the Japanese doings of things. Propelled by my hunger and the will to be a 'great Japanese,' I cracked the Natto open. With but a slit, my nose perceived the presence of a formidable enemy. Surprised, I ran to the nearest trash can and ridded myself of what I thought to be mold (kabi) . Which wasn't too far from the truth.

NATTO

Today, as I write this some two years after the said event, I have yet to eat this mysterious natto. I have a gaijin friend who claims it to be delicious. I will take his word for it, but I won't take his natto.

- By Clay