Q: So why are you trying to make our lives more difficult by switching from blog to a webpage?

A: I’m not trying to make anyone’s life more difficult (other than mine). What I’m simply doing is moving the great hit that my blog was to a full-blown webpage which allows me to have more room to put up dick, fart, and retard jokes. So really it’s a win-win for everyone. So stop whining.

Q: How often do you update this abortion of a website?

A: There will always be new posts (like the old blog style entries) throughout each day Monday-Friday. I will also update the other sections with Special Editions, comics, jokes, and other misc. items. But don’t hold your breath.

Q: So what’s so new about this site?

A: I have included a lot more sections including: “The Archives” section. This is pretty self explanatory. It’s basically where you can find all my posts I have ever written. If you need further explanation to this, please put a plastic bag over your head and suffocate yourself for your own good.

* The “Linkage” section basically is a breakdown of websites that you should give look at. It has my friend’s sites, shopping, things to do, TV, etc. It has taken me a long time to add all of these and I will continue to update them as needed.

* The “Quote of the Day” section is where I will add quotes that I come across that I deem worthy of my stamp of approval. If you come across any, email them to me and maybe yours will be on the site! Or maybe I will just delete your email. Whatever.

* “The Ladies of Jackass” is a very special section. This is a list of ladies that I deem to be incredibly hot and that I would like to share with all of you. Click on their names and you will be whisked away to their site. It’s the least I can do for them after all the joy they have brought into my life.

* “From the Mouth of a Jackass” section is the daily blog that you all loved from my old blog website. This will be updated Monday-Friday throughout the daytime hours. Read it. Believe it. Live it.

* “Jackass Picture” is a section that will have a comic or funny picture or whatever the hell else I want because it’s my damn site. So there.

* “Today’s Special” is a section that will have Special Editions, jokes, stories, Linkage, etc. This I would like to update daily, but sometimes will be every couple of days. Sorry I have a job and life to attend to.

* “Special Edition Archives” section is pretty self explanatory too. It is where you can go to have easy access to my world famous Special Edition quizzes, advice columns, and stories.

*“Jessica Simpson Tribute” section is simply that, a tribute to the queen of hotties, Jessica Simpson. While the pictures may change from time to time, this section will never change. Just like my love for her.

Q: That’s it?

A: Yeah, that’s about all. At least for now.

Q: I’m not really that impressed.

A: Yeah, I’m not really either.

Q: [silence] So you want to go grab some Chicken McNuggets?

A: Sure.